


A Spymaster's Pet

by Ficmog



Series: ASP [1]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers: Prime
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Fluff, From chapter 4 onwards, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Intimacy, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mutual Masturbation, Not all sad though, Psychotherapy, Sexual Content, Suicide Attempt, Tickling
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-17
Updated: 2016-09-18
Packaged: 2018-07-15 12:58:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 44,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7223260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ficmog/pseuds/Ficmog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Afflicted with an uncertain mental health condition and feeling useless about, it Bumblebee is driven to commit suicide. Yet through a strange coincidence, he attracts the attention of a certain Decepticon spymaster by doing so. </p>
<p>Taken to the Nemesis, he finds himself exposed to a very different atmosphere where his supposed enemies act in stark contrast to what he was led to believe, at last seeming to receive the care he always needed. Nonetheless, recovering isn't easy, either for himself or for the weary Autobots and Decepticons.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 瞬き(Flicker)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took much longer than it should have, but I finally got the first chapter done. I hope you enjoy reading.
> 
> Kanji 瞬き(まはたき-Mabataki) in title means Blink, but there's also a second translation (ブリッカー or Burīka) meaning Flicker. I used the latter translation here. I started doing these Japanese title names after finishing chapter 6. Not sure why; I suppose it's just my enthusiasm for language shining through.

"Is someone there? This feels familiar... but... I'm not sure-"

His optics came online, though half closed. It seemed he had only been dreaming or imagining it. He sat up slowly on the recharge berth in the dark, barely able to see the yellow colour of his frame through all the black. It must still be night, he thought, since the automatic lights in the base came on during the day and weren't active yet. Bumblebee would spend more time awake in the dark if he could; it was much more peaceful than daily life and work at the base. Still tired, he lied back down to get some more recharge. He would know when it was "morning", as the humans called it, from all the noise in the command centre. He remained motionless for a while, but found himself overthinking. Again. He knew he shouldn't, but it just seemed to happen on its own. First it was annoying, then distressing, and eventually horrifying, forcing a pair of coolant tears from his optics. Why did this always happen when he was awake, and why he have such terrible thoughts in the first place? He felt so useless. He just wanted it to stop, he wanted an end, he just wanted...

...The overhead lights in Bumblebee's quarters lit up. Confused, he looked around his room for his personal datapad and checked the time. 9:00 am, in human time. He sighed and sat back down, concluding that he probably cried himself back into recharge without noticing. The rest of the Autobots in the base were likely active by now. He didn't expect things were going to get any better for him, so he decided to wait until he was called, as he usually did. Being alone was generally better for him than being with too many people, so he tried to drag it out as long as he could. It would probably be a while before he felt comfortable going out.

"Where is it? I thought I told you all not to touch anything in here!" yelled the voice of Ratchet from the command centre, With a groggy looking Bulkhead walking into the room just in time to hear. 

"Uh, hey Ratchet. What's up?" Bulkhead asked, receiving an irritated glare from Ratchet before his reply came. Ratchet seemed to be acting indignant over trivial issues, as usual. 

"My field scanner is missing from where I left it. You wouldn't happen to know where it is, would you?" the medic questioned to Bulkhead in an accusatory manner, to which the wrecker gave a surprised expression and fumbled for a moment before replying. 

"Er... about that... I took it last evening to scan myself after an accident while driving, and I accidentally broke it. You looked too busy yesterday, so I didn't tell you. Erm... my bad, I guess?" He'd almost forgotten about the scanner, and now he was probably going to regret not telling Ratchet about it earlier. He braced himself for his response.

That response was nothing short of livid; "My bad? Bulkhead, I needed that! I can't scan people outside the base without it! Did it honestly not occur to you to tell me if you thought you were damaged? You shouldn't even be taking such equipment without notice anyway!" 

The medic's classic indignation rolled off every word he spoke. Yep, Bulkhead definitely regretted not telling Ratchet about that accident. The impending rant was halted, however, by the entrance of Optimus Prime into the command centre. 

"Calm yourself Ratchet," he spoke slowly; "It takes little time to replace scanners of such basic design, and we have all the necessary components in the base." He then looked at Bulkhead and made his voice firmer. "Though In future, Bulkhead, I must ask that you obtain permission before using medical equipment, no matter how replaceable. It should save you further embarrassment."

"Yes, of course. Sorry Optimus, and sorry Ratchet as well." Bulkhead's apology sounded more formal than he intended. His respect for Optimus, both as his leader and as a mediator, tended to have that effect whenever he was with him. The prime gave a nod as an acceptance of the apology, though Ratchet responded more abrasively. 

"Humph, just let me get on with my work." he said dismissively, only to be dragged back into the moment by Arcee, who had just entered the room and was standing beside Optimus. 

"Maybe you should put alarms near your storage areas, unless all the beeping just annoys you," she joked, remembering how any siren that wasn't Ratchet's own made him get irritated. He just ignored her, and she smirked to herself before turning to Optimus and speaking again. "It's been pretty boring recently. No attacks by cons for months. Not that that's a bad thing, but there's only so much waiting around I can take."

"Do not let yourself become too eager," he replied with his usual caution; "There is no sense in provoking unnecessary fighting."

Arcee's face took a strained expression. "You make it sound simple. You know, I try, but I don't think I could ever develop the same restraint you have, Optimus." He was well aware of Arcee's past sufferings in the war, and made sure to keep that in account when advising her.

"I don't expect you to control yourself all the time. Just keep practicing and you should gradually see results." Arcee smiled at him, after which they both looked across the command centre. Optimus was reminded of a missing yellow mech, his face adopting a similar forlorn expression to that of Arcee a few moments ago. 

"I guess Bumblebee's getting up last again." she acknowledged, picking up on Optimus's thoughts. 

"Yes," Optimus replied with an unusual vagueness; "He is."

Noise. It was the only way he could describe the last few kliks as he groaned on his berth. Ratchet always got overly grumpy about his belongings in the base. He was too overbearing for him to be around. Sometimes he wished the medic would just shut up and die-What? Bumblebee's servos shot up to his head. Die? No, that wasn't what he wanted. He didn't want Ratchet dead...did he? He felt himself becoming anxious again as he dropped his head down to look at the floor. Here it was again. It felt horrible, but he could never stop it. Why did he even have such thoughts at all? Was there something wrong with him? If there was, he'd probably never know. The war had always taken priority, so medical diagnoses were scarce, especially for mental health. It must have been such a burden to the other Autobots to have him with them. Maybe he should-

"Bumblebee!" boomed Bulkhead's voice from outside his room. "We're about to receive a mission briefing. You should come out soon!" He began to walk back down the hall, but stopped and added "Oh. And sorry if I was too loud."

'It's alright, Bulkhead.' Bumblebee thought. He didn't mind the big wrecker, despite his occasional clumsiness. Maybe he would have talked with him more often if there was more time and he wasn't afraid to. He sighed and lifted himself from the berth slowly, reaching for the switch to open the door in his quarters. Hopefully the briefing wouldn't last long, that way he could avoid some triggers. With that hope in mind, he exited his quarters and walked hurriedly to the command centre in an attempt to distract himself, and upon entering he found Optimus Prime standing near the base computers with the other Autobots opposite him. He moved to the side next to them and waited for Optimus to begin the briefing.

"Thank you for joining us, Bumblebee," he acknowledged before beginning; "I am pleased to report that there has been no significant Decepticon activity in the past few Earth months. Therefore your duties will not extend to more than energon mine excavation and patrols. We have recently discovered a new deposit, and I will be assigning Arcee and Bulkhead to investigate the location."

"Aww, I thought I was gonna be off duty today." Bulkhead moaned, prompting Arcee to nudge him.

"Can it, Bulkhead. It only takes a few hours at most. You'll have enough time to yourself after."

"Yeah, alright," he responded with less annoyance in his voice; "I'll just play lob ball or hang out with Miko afterwards."

Bumblebee glanced around the room nervously, anticipating the arrival of more familiar faces as a car sped into the command centre and stopped in between Arcee and Bulkhead. Three humans came out of the car, which he immediately recognised as Jack, Miko and Rafael. The humans immediately moved towards the Autobots and started conversing with them, While he watched from a distance. They all seemed to be enjoying themselves, at least. Bumblebee found himself looking mostly at Rafael and Optimus, who was his guardian. They looked to be having quite the cheerful conversation, and Bumblebee smiled faintly in happiness for them both until a painful memory ruined the moment for him and he turned away. Bumblebee had been that human's charge himself at one point, but at the climax of constant fear and worry on his part Optimus decided to take guardianship of Rafael himself. It was a source of guilt and shame for Bumblebee, and yet another reminder that he could barely protect himself, let alone anyone else. It lingered, but he tried to ignore it and looked over to the other conversations going on in the room. Bulkhead and Arcee were also talking with their charges while Ratchet continued working, only responding half heartedly to any questions or statements thrown his way.

The situation before him seemed enjoyable at first, but once again gave way to his worries and regrets. Each of the other Autobots had something to admire about them: Arcee was a skilled fighter and considerate to those around her, Bulkhead was strong yet gentle around those he liked, Ratchet was helpful when not in a mood and Optimus was wise and understanding, always listening to others when he had the time. And what about Bumblebee? All he seemed to do was cause problems and worry constantly, when he wasn't having random violent thoughts of course. He covered his face with a servo and walked over to a wall, a deep sadness erupting in him. Why was he here, and why did Optimus keep him around? Did he feel it was his duty to protect other Autobots? It must have been such a hindrance to the others to have him here. He just couldn't seem... to do anything right...

Bumblebee collapsed into a quiet sob, his body slumped down the side of the wall. He remained that way until he heard a voice calling him. 

"Bumblebee? Bumblebee!" it called, as he quickly recognised it as the voice of Optimus Prime. He opened his eyes to find Optimus sitting beside him with a servo resting on his shoulder. "You seem quite upset," he noted with concern. "Is something troubling you?" 

Bumblebee gave a small nod and babbled something in response. "I d-don't know how to explain, I'm sorry, I-" 

Optimus gave a firm nod and squeezed his shoulder gently before replying. "It's alright, I understand. You should rest in your quarters for now."

He helped Bumblebee up and watched as he walked slowly to his quarters. Bumblebee made sure not to look back at everyone who had been watching him while he did so. When back in his room, he quickly climbed onto his berth and huddled himself, trying to put what just happened as far back in his mind as possible. The effort was useless, however, once he overheard the other Autobots talking about him.

"Don't think I've ever seen him just break down like that." mused Bulkhead; "You sure he hasn't got something up with him?" 

Bumblebee's attention was caught, the mech listening intently but worriedly in his fragile state. 

"I'm with Bulkhead," said Arcee; "He needs to get checked out. It's becoming more of a problem over time."

Bumblebee thought he heard something break in him upon hearing that. If even Arcee thought he was a problem then it all but confirmed his fears.

"You think we haven't been trying?" Ratchet blurted, speaking for himself and Optimus; "We're all soldiers here, there's hardly any time to address it! Besides, even if I had the time, there's only so much I could do. I'm a combat medic, not a psychiatrist!" 

He spoke loudly as he always did, but in his current circumstance it sounded frightening to Bumblebee rather than just annoying. He hadn't heard any humans talk yet, so maybe they had been sent home or out of the room? It wouldn't matter either way, it was still terrible regardless.

He heard Ratchet mutter something else. "Just great. This is becoming worse than the voice box". 

Were they still all going on about that? They all said it was done by the Decepticons, but Bumblebee simply couldn't remember exactly what happened. His focus returned once another voice spoke, which provided the final push to break him. 

"I fear it is my error," Optimus entered the conversation, commanding attention as always; "I should have known better than to allow such an issue to fester. It is now showing its effects on both him and us." 

Bumblebee was left distraught at Optimus's words. He must have been regretting assigning him here. He held his head in his servos and let out and anguished cry. He knew it. He was just causing everyone problems; he shouldn't be here. Bumblebee began to sob and couldn't hear the rest of the conversation. He continued for a while afterwards until he couldn't seem to cry anymore, then laid on his berth depressed.

With nothing else he could think of doing, Bumblebee began to reflect on his life up till this point. Come to think of it, he'd never wanted to be an Autobot, or get caught up in this war at all. He had been drafted unwillingly while young, and subjected to many horrific sights. There was never much chance to talk to anyone, and even if there was, no one seemed able to assist. It all felt like a waste to him. As he reflected, he decided on something he had been pondering for a while. If his life was wasteful, it would be best just to end it. He crossed his arms around him as if shivering in the cold upon thinking that. He had been putting it off in the hopes of finding something else, but now it seemed like the only option for him. He then wondered how he could carry it out. He had a good opportunity to leave the base this cycle without being noticed: Arcee and Bulkhead would be out on patrol, while Ratchet was soon to be checking energon deposits in the storage rooms with Optimus. That would leave him a few minutes to quickly drive out of the base. He knew a steep cliff in the mountains of Wyoming that would be appropriately high to do the job. He'd have to use the ground bridge to make it quick, which would alert the others when they came back, but it didn't matter since he wouldn't be. Deciding on that action, he waited until Ratchet and Optimus left then quickly entered the command centre, activating the ground bridge and heading through in his alt. mode.

...Why didn't he just shoot himself? It would have been much quicker than all this driving. Thinking over it further, he winced and decided against it. He was probably just sick of all the gunfire, having no fond memories of it. He exited the ground bridge a short distance away from the cliff, so all he needed to do was drive through the forest area leading up to it and he would be there soon enough. After a few more minutes of driving, Bumblebee found himself at the cliff which was his final destination. He transformed back to his base form and walked up closer to the cliff edge, jolting in surprise when he realised just how steep it was. It would definitely kill him to jump off from here. Just then, it fully occurred to Bumblebee what he was about to do, and he tensed up in fear at the prospect. Taking a few steps back, he collapsed to the floor and began crying uncontrollably, lamenting over his impending suicide but finding no other way out. He wanted to stop suffering, and this was the only way he could do it. Managing to get to his feet again (and unaware of someone watching him), he closed his eyes, ran forward and launched himself off the cliff, still crying as he fell. He was surprised to feel an impact quite early in his fall, one that felt softer than he'd anticipated. 'Is it over already?' he thought as his consciousness slipped... slowly... as if he were just going into recharge...

...He could have sworn he heard the sound of jet engines...

***

Arising... receding... in... out...-

"Sir?" a familiar voice chirped, prompting him to exit his waking meditation. As expected, he was met with the forms of his minicons, Laserbeak and Ravage. 

"Yes, is there something you need?" Soundwave asked, focusing his attention on them with the consideration he always gave. 

Laserbeak, who had spoken before, replied "We just wanted to inform you of a predicament that's recently occurred onboard." The avian mech then deferred to Ravage, who came closer to Soundwave as he often did to be respectful before speaking to him. 

Soundwave nodded to signify he was listening, and Ravage began; "There's been some hull maintenance issues last hour, so a lot of workers are being rushed to the affected areas to patch things up. You might find yourself disrupted by all the people traffic."

He ended nervously, as Soundwave quickly noticed. Perhaps he thought he was wasting his time with such a trivial issue? Soundwave smiled to reassure him and replied "Thank you both. I will keep it in mind," before standing up and walking to the door. He paused before leaving, turning his head back to the minicons. "You may stay here for a while if you wish," he offered; "I do not believe you have any shifts at present." 

Ravage immediately perked up and happily jumped onto Soundwave's berth, rolling around to soak up any remaining warmth while Laserbeak looked on in embarrassment until a devious idea came to him. "I'll... look after him while you're gone." he said with a hint of mischief, which Soundwave noticed but paid no heed, nodding before placing his visor on and leaving to begin his work for the cycle. Laserbeak then flew over to his berth and perched on the side, facing Ravage who was still rolling about and messing the covers up. "Enjoying yourself, kitten?" he asked innocently, Ravage noticing him and looking up with a smile. 

"Yep, it's warm and there's lots of space. Wanna join?" 

The feline was then startled as Laserbeak suddenly pinned him down. "You could say that." he chuckled darkly, a smirk gracing his beak.

Soundwave brought up a touchscreen and checked Vehicon activity across the ship to verify what his deployers had said. They looked to be correct; there were several large regiments rushing towards the hull area of the Nemesis, right through corridors which he usually walked through to get to his workstation at the bridge quicker. Soundwave adapted to the disruption by calibrating a different route which involved passing near the medical bay, and set off down the necessary halls. He would likely still be on schedule, and he welcomed the chance to see different sights than usual on his way. Walking past the medical bay as his new route entailed, he spotted Breakdown striding towards the doors with Knock Out closely following. He overheard a conversation between them as he walked and, as was his custom, set up an automatic record. 

"You know, there hasn't really been much to do lately," Breakdown mused; "Aside from securing our energon mines, we haven't been given any particular orders outside of typical duties, not even about Autobots. Kinda makes me happy for the little problem with the hull we've got right now." 

Knock Out gave a light scoff before responding: "Well, I'm certainly not. Problems with the ship just mean more chance of people getting damaged, which means more Vehicons in the medical bay and more work. I already have five patients from last cycle, you know!" He cried out in complaint, servos clenched into fists.

Breakdown tried to ease his tension with his next comment. "Hey, at least you'll get more recognised if it does come to that. Everyone will have to appreciate how tirelessly you work to keep everyone functioning, even Starscream." 

Knock Out smirked, amused at Breakdown's remark. "You do exaggerate," he downplayed; "But maybe you have the right idea, if only so I can see the look on our sub-commander's face." He then sighed and looked down. "Still, I do get sick of constantly reminding everyone that breaking, and not fixing, is my strong suit." 

Breakdown then slapped his shoulder gently and consoled him. "Hey, the next time we both receive a combat order, we can go and break things as much as you want." Knock Out smiled at him in response as they both entered the medical bay.

'How typical' Soundwave thought as he stopped recording. Some mechs had become so caught up in the fighting that they seemed to value that over what they were actually fighting for, if anyone even remembered that now. It left Soundwave disappointed how corrupted the Decepticon cause had become over time in the minds of many who professed to ascribe to it. Even Megatron, who had brought them all together, whom he respected both as a leader and a fellow gladiator, no longer seemed to have sight of why he formed the Decepticons in the first place. But Soundwave always had recordings, much like the one he just made, and kept them close. They were windows to the past more accurate than memory, which could easily become distorted, and he made sure to listen to them regularly to keep himself from faltering. Thankfully, Megatron had begun to have concerns of his own and wanted Soundwave to advise him. It had come to him as a request rather than an order, as Megatron often allowed himself when speaking to his old friend. With any luck, perhaps he could steer Megatron towards their original path, or at least a better one than he was taking now.

Continuing on his way to the bridge, he came across a sight he would have immediately labelled as 'bothersome' were he not above making knee-jerk assumptions. It was Starscream berating one of the Vehicon regiments who had just come back from the hull area, though thankfully they were at a crossway between corridors so he could still walk past. 

"You lazy morons!" Starscream barked in a tone Soundwave was used to but still found grating; "Get back in there and finish the job!" 

Just then one of the Vehicons mustered the courage to defend the group's actions, a rare sight when faced with Starscream. "But commander, the main hull breach has been fixed, all that's there now is some tiny cracks-"

"I don't care how small they are!" Starscream blurted back; "If any blemishes are there at all it could spell disaster. Get back there! No mistakes!" 

Soundwave was surprised he hadn't reacted worse. He was paranoid about Spacecraft maintenance, probably from his time as a naval commander, and even if the issue wasn't significant it could still send him reeling. 

Starscream then turned to Soundwave and spoke at a much lower tone. "I apologise for the commotion, Soundwave. Dealing with incompetent workers often requires raising my decibels, regrettably." 

Ignoring how hilarious it was for Starscream of all people to be complaining about incompetence, Soundwave gave him a brief reply in the monotone voice he used when speaking to those who weren't close to him. "Apology: not needed. Soundwave: required at bridge." 

Starscream muttered a small "Of course." before walking down the hall where he had sent the Vehicons at his usual agitated pace. 

Soundwave continued along his route and found the doors to the bridge, entering and heading to his workstation. Soon after he had begun working, the door to the bridge opened, and Soundwave heard familiar large footsteps enter the room. 

"Soundwave," rumbled the voice of Megatron; "I am glad to see you could still make it here despite the current disruption." 

Soundwave kept his optics on his work, but gave a response. "Laserbeak and Ravage informed me beforehand. I simply charted another route." He spoke in his own voice, like he did with his minicons, as Megatron had earned that privilege. 

Megatron walked closer and continued, which as Soundwave had observed often signified he wanted a conversation. "I have been taking time to consider what you said to me previously. Many of your points have raised concerns, and I have reduced the amount of orders I give per cycle to make time to address them." 

Soundwave was elated to know that his work as an advisor was producing effects, and though continuing to work he took the moment to express his approval. "That is all I can ask for now. Thank you for your consideration, and I hope we can go into more detail over time." 

Megatron looked to the other side of the bridge, a servo covering his mouth, before he picked up on Soundwave's last sentence. "About that... " he began; "What particularly concerns me is the words you spoke regarding our cause, and what has become of it. Do you truly believe I have strayed? I suppose my fixation with the Autobots would make it appear as such, but I thought I would still remember the basic principles. Yet you have indicated to me otherwise." A tone of regret and sadness lingered across his voice as he spoke, and Soundwave allowed him time to deal with his thoughts before speaking again. 

"I could give you copies of my recordings if you wish. They may clarify matters for you."

"Yes," Megatron agreed. "That would be helpful. I am grateful you would offer that, considering how protective you often are-" 

They were interrupted by Knock Out and Starscream barging into the bridge, bickering over some trivial matter.

"How many times must I tell you not to dump absolutely all injuries on me?" Knock Out blared loudly; "You could easily treat these Vehicons yourself with a medical kit! I already have patients with far more serious injuries to treat!" 

Starscream then responded equally as loud "I am your commanding officer! You will take on as many patients as I say!" he cried, being insecure about his authority as usual. 

"Oh, for spark's sake," Knock Out retorted; "I bet all that bluster is just a cover for your not knowing how to use a medkit. Why, I wouldn't be surprised if you never took the time to do even basic health procedures-"

"Silence!" Megatron roared; "No wonder this ship is falling apart, if even the officers won't work because of ridiculous disputes like yours! I may as well just rip out your-" Megatron stopped once he noticed Soundwave staring at him in warning. He lowered his voice and sighed before thinking up a solution for the issue. "Knock Out will continue working on the patients in the medical bay. Starscream will find a medical kit and use it to treat any Vehicons with minor injuries, and if he has difficulty he will defer to either a Vehicon competent in first aid or to Knock Out once his main work is finished." 

Knock Out simply nodded and went back to work muttering to himself, while Starscream said "Yes, Lord Megatron." begrudgingly before quickly leaving.

Soundwave had just finished his work for the cycle when Megatron turned to face him again. "You have great patience to have been able to work through all that." he acknowledged with amusement. But his face quickly took a more solemn expression as he spoke again: "I am sorry. I could have made that far worse than it was, had you not stopped me." 

Soundwave walked up to him and placed a servo on his shoulder. "You are still practicing at least. Do not be deterred by mistakes." he comforted before making a request; "Although, I would like to go outside and cool off after all of this cycle's events." Megatron gave a smirk, essentially his version of a smile, and nodded to grant his request. Soundwave made his way to the door, pausing to add "I will check on my minicons before I go. May I suggest you take some rest as well?" 

Megatron nodded once more and replied "Agreed. I will retire to my quarters. Use the docking bay to exit when you are ready." 

Soundwave then left the bridge and made his way back to his quarters, taking his usual shorter route now that all the commotion had died down. 'I wonder what Laserbeak has been doing with Ravage.' he thought while walking.

Arriving at his destination, Soundwave entered the passcode for his quarters and upon entering was met with an amusing sight. 

"I told you I'd look after him," Laserbeak greeted as Soundwave entered. He had Ravage trapped between two pillows and covered with his wings, and was tickling him all over with his claws. "Don't worry. I gave him some breaks, from my perspective at least," he stated wryly, nuzzling against Ravage's head while he tickled him. "You've been a good little kitten haven't you?" he teased, deepening his strokes and making him writhe in laughter; "You haven't messed up sir's room nearly as much as usual. I'm so proud of you." 

Laserbeak then placed his beak to Ravage's neck, stroking it with the tip and releasing his tongue to lick it, and Ravage mewled before catching a glimpse of Soundwave, who had just removed his visor. "S-Soundwave, hahaha! M-make him stohohop! Please!" 

Soundwave smiled. He probably wouldn't have minded if he didn't stop Laserbeak. They both enjoyed it, and Laserbeak knew when it became too much for Ravage and would always stop at that point. But he decided to anyway since he needed to tell them he would be out for a while. "Laserbeak, you can release Ravage now." he told him, so he reluctantly loosened his hold on the feline and helped him out of the pillow trap. Soundwave sat on the berth and Ravage darted into his lap, looking back at Laserbeak and staring. 

"You're evil." he pouted jokingly, Laserbeak smirking and taking it as a compliment.

"And don't you ever forget it." 

The two of them then focused their attention on Soundwave, and he promptly told them where he was going. "I am about to take a flight to cool off; this cycle has been rather hectic. You each have your night watch duties coming up soon, so I expect you outside the door at midnight next cycle. You should get some recharge until then." Ravage and Laserbeak both nodded to him and went to their shared berth. 

"We'll be there even if you're not!" Ravage assured, to which Soundwave nodded before reapplying his visor and leaving the room again. He headed to the open docking bay and transformed into his alt. mode before flying out of the Nemesis and into the sky of the Earth.

It was much more peaceful out here than in most places on the ship. So many stimulating sights, and so little to distract from them. Yes, this was what he needed after such a tiring day. A few moments to himself and he would be all refreshed-

'Bleep!' came a detection alert on his radar and HUD. It was too distant to determine exactly what it was, but he could determine its location as being somewhere in Wyoming, USA, which he had just flown near. With little else to do, he decided it might be worth investigating. He flew closer to the signal location, pinpointing it to a steep cliff at the edge of a forest, and was able to define the signal more accurately as an Autobot signal, one he was familiar with. He touched down in the forest to avoid detection and transformed to base form, moving towards the cliff edge and hiding behind the trees to get a closer look. As he suspected the signal was coming from the Autobot scout, Bumblebee. He remained hidden and observed his actions, wanting to avoid instigating conflict if possible. The scout was pacing nervously and shaking a bit, walking towards the cliff edge. He then stopped, took a few steps back and collapsed, crying rather violently. Soundwave was confused, wondering what could be upsetting him. He kept edging towards the cliff and then jolting back, like he was debating whether to jump over it. But why would he wish to do such a thing? This was a very steep cliff; jumping off it without an alt. mode capable of flight would spell death for any Cybertronian. It would be illogical, suicidal, to do it. Unless...

Unless he was in fact committing suicide. Soundwave felt a large degree of sadness and compassion well up inside him upon realising that, and his chest ached and tensed up. He realised what Bumblebee was doing moments before the scout made his jump, and the sight of him running to the cliff made him disregard him as an Autobot and an enemy. The moment Bumblebee's feet left the cliff edge, Soundwave immediately transformed to his alt. mode and flew after him at full throttle. He managed to get under Bumblebee and catch him on the top of his jet form, extending his feelers to support him and prevent him from bouncing off, and took his now unconscious frame back up the cliff and into the forest. He transformed to carry him in and lay him at the base of a tree, examining the scout to check for any damage and making some perplexing finds. There had been no damage from the fall just now, but there were several cuts across his frame, mainly on his chest and especially his Autobot insignia. They looked too precise to be caused by battle or accidents, and Soundwave wondered if Bumblebee might have caused them himself as a form of self harm. Soundwave stroked Bumblebee's head in concern, pondering what to do, then decided it would be best to take him to his quarters and examine him further. He picked up the other's smaller frame and opened a ground bridge to the Nemesis, heading through. It was going to be quite the long night before this cycle was over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I enjoyed writing this. It might be a bit ambitious for my first fic, but if I persevere I'll be able to make it work.


	2. 夢 (Dream)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was able to write this chapter surprisingly quickly. I think things are progressing steadily in the story now.
> 
> Kanji 夢 (ゆめ-Yume) in title means Dream or Dreaming.

'There would be no point trying to hide him.' Soundwave reasoned to himself as he stood in the Nemesis docking bay, holding Bumblebee unconscious in his arms and over his shoulder. The ship was surveyed too heavily for that, no thanks to his own efforts, and even if he shut off all the cameras and motion detectors there were still too many people onboard. One of them was bound to spot him. Walking towards the door, he decided it would be best to just go to Megatron and make Bumblebee's presence known immediately to avoid surprises. He went through to the hallway and made his way to the bridge, where Megatron would be giving night shift orders. He was met with murmurs and muttering from many Vehicons as he walked, but none of them dared to ask him why he had brought an Autobot onboard, making his journey quicker than it could have been. He entered the bridge and found Megatron back from his rest as expected, looking out of the window with Knock Out, Breakdown and Starscream gathered behind him.

"I am aware that this cycle has been rather troublesome for all of us," Megatron addressed the officers behind him; "But I believe it is best to continue at the normal schedule regardless, lest any further issues present themselves." 

The officers nodded grudgingly, clearly unwilling to do night shifts after the events that occurred earlier. 

Megatron looked over his shoulder to gauge their expressions before addressing them again. "If you are truly agitated by this, you may send your grievances to me early next cycle. I will hear them if it suits me." he conceded in half-compensation, about to turn his head back to the window but catching a glimpse of Soundwave, and instead turning his entire body around to face him. "Soundwave, you are back so soon? I did not expect that your flight would be so-" he was cut off briefly by his own surprise at seeing the body Soundwave was holding; "short," he ended. Megatron quickly got over his surprise and let a large smirk run across his faceplates as he began walking towards Soundwave and the familiar scout he held. "Well, tonight just became much more interesting," he rumbled as the officers began to give reactions of their own to seeing the Autobot in Soundwave's arms, Breakdown looking confused while Knock Out and Starscream gave expressions of amusement. "And where did you find the scout exactly?" Megatron queried, having stopped a short distance from Soundwave. 

"Autobot: found at cliff in Wyoming, USA." Soundwave answered in monotone as he preferred to when in an overly public environment. 

"I see," Megatron responded; "Was he doing anything of particular interest?" 

Soundwave took a glance at the unconscious mech he held before answering again: "Autobot: was attempting suicide." 

Megatron's expression changed to be more serious upon hearing his answer, while the officers muttered in confusion. "Ah," he responded, stumped; "Then this is quite the unique situation. I am not certain what would be an effective method of dealing with this."

"Then why did you not simply leave him to do his business?" Starscream interjected accusingly towards Soundwave; "You could have saved us the trouble of dealing with this Autobot again."

"Oh, how boring," Knock Out rebutted him; "You should really use your imagination more. This provides so many opportunities!" 

Starscream glared at Knock Out, while Breakdown remained silent. He knew better than to get involved with disputes between them. 

Megatron then found himself smirking once again. "Yes," he mused, considering Knock Out's words; "There are indeed several ways we could make use of this,". But he restrained himself from doing anything drastic, turning to face Soundwave once again. Soundwave would have applauded him for that were they not in a formal situation. "What do you think, Soundwave?" Megatron deferred; "You are the one who brought him here. It would only be appropriate for you to have a say." 

Soundwave nodded and gave his proposal: "Soundwave: will keep Autobot in quarters. Bumblebee: will be protected from harm." Soundwave was surprised he had stated that so honestly, and Starscream immediately reacted. 

"What? You make it sound as if you care about him!" he cried out in protest, but Megatron prevented him from continuing. 

"Now, now, Starscream," he spoke chidingly; "There's nothing wrong with having affection for a pet." 

Soundwave immediately caught on with what he was doing. 'Pet' wasn't perhaps the best of possible statuses for the former scout, but it would do for now in order to appease the others onboard. 

"Oh, this should be good." Breakdown spoke with interest, rousing Knockout to speak as well.

"I'll bet," he responded to his partner chuckling; "Soundwave's the last person you'd normally expect to be proposing something like this." 

Megatron ignored them and continued focusing on Soundwave, sorting out the details of this new arrangement. "Is this what you most want to do with him?" he enquired looking for confirmation, to which Soundwave nodded. "You understand that you alone will be responsible for him?" Soundwave nodded again. "Very well," Megatron resolved the matter in announcement to everyone on the bridge; "This mech will be kept on the ship in Soundwave's custody. He is his responsibility, and no one else is to approach him without Soundwave's permission. I will send another announcement to the rest of the ship on this matter shortly." All others in the room besides Soundwave and Megatron nodded, and Megatron promptly sent Soundwave on his way back to his quarters.

As he made his way through the halls he pondered the course of action Megatron had just taken. Anyone other than himself would not likely have had such a proposal granted by him, and he did it in a way that would prevent tensions rising too high. Whether it was for his benefit or Bumblebee's he couldn't be certain, but what mattered was that the scout would be safer on the ship through the arrangement. He was also glad that Megatron hadn't brought up the incident at Tyger Pax regarding his vocaliser. That, he suspected, was for his own benefit, as he had never approved of the action and had reprimanded Megatron when he first learned of it. He forgave him over time, and simply listed it as one of the many consequences of Megatron's anger that they needed to work on reducing. While on the topic of Bumblebee's vocaliser, he made a note to have it repaired when the opportunity came, before arriving at the door to his quarters and meeting Ravage and Laserbeak whom he had posted there on night watch.

"We heard the announcement," Ravage informed Soundwave while looking at the unconscious Bumblebee curiously, wondering what it would be like to live with an Autobot. He exchanged looks with Laserbeak before Soundwave entered his quarters with Bumblebee, and the two followed him in behind. 

Soundwave asked Laserbeak and Ravage to take the blanket off the berth, which he anticipated they would find confusing. 

Laserbeak, surprisingly, was the one to question: "Won't he be uncomfortable?" 

Soundwave moved towards his maintenance cabinet, opening it, and explained: "I want to replace it with a thicker blanket." 

The two then understood, taking the sheets off. Soundwave took Bumblebee off his shoulder and placed him on the berth, before heading to the cabinet to get the thicker blanket he was referring to. He returned and placed the blanket over Bumblebee, then sat beside him and removed his visor while Laserbeak and Ravage came up to the berth next to him. 

"He's cute, but his chest doesn't look good." Ravage commented, noticing the cuts that Soundwave saw previously. 

"Yes... " Soundwave murmured, stroking one of Bumblebee's doorwings; "I wish to know what brought him to this, but we will likely need to spend time calming him down first when he awakes." 

The minicons nodded in understanding. They both already knew what had happened on the cliff, since Soundwave shared the data with them digitally through a program he built into their frames along with his own. It sent copies of the data he gathered to them as backups, and in a sense made them extensions of himself, albeit with their own personalities. It was more secure than the telepathic links he was also capable of making, and they both preferred the more intimate connection it gave them to their creator. 

After spending a few moments in silence, Soundwave decided to find a method of repairing Bumblebee's vocaliser and stood up. "I am going to the medical bay to enquire about vocaliser repairs," he explained to them; "Keep watch on Bumblebee while I am away, but if he wakes up do not make your presence known to him until I return."

"You're inviting disaster." Laserbeak warned jokingly with his eyes on Ravage, who turned his head in disapproval. 

Soundwave reiterated to them more firmly: "I am trusting you both not to cause unnecessary distress." They each responded more seriously by nodding before Soundwave took his leave. He could trust them. They were playful, but not rough, and they made sure to follow his directives as closely as possible.

***

...Mmm, this felt nice. Wherever he was it was so warm... he wanted to stay like this...   
Bumblebee's optics opened gradually. He glanced around slowly and found himself in an unfamiliar place. The room he was in had a violet and light grey colour scheme, with a collection of data pads on shelves. There was a cabinet built into the wall near the door, and the room as a whole was quite spacious, with a wide floor and ceiling. He was lying in a large berth that must have been at least twice the size of his own back at the outpost, covered with a thick and comfortable blanket. 'What is this, some kind of afterlife?' he pondered, unsure why he was here. He had just tried to kill himself after all, and he had no company while doing it as far as he knew. It was possible someone had saved him, but it seemed unlikely considering how remote the location he chose was. He tried to assure himself that this was an afterlife, then shifted slightly in the berth. The lull of the warm blanket came to him again and he pulled it closer to himself, snuggling more deeply into the berth and the pillow. Wherever this was, at least it had better recharge facilities than the base, he acknowledged with a slight smile.

Unknown to Bumblebee, Laserbeak and Ravage were watching him from the corner where the cabinet stuck out of the wall. 

"This is adorable." Ravage whispered to Laserbeak, who smiled to him in agreement before refocusing. 

"But we need to make sure he doesn't see us yet." Laserbeak reminded him. 

Ravage nodded and made a suggestion: "Maybe we should send note to Soundwave that he's awake." 

Laserbeak glanced back at Bumblebee for a moment before before facing Ravage again. "Good idea." he whispered before sending the visual data to Soundwave.

***

The medical bay was busy as usual, Soundwave noted as he entered. Knock Out had three patients in intensive care, while Breakdown was sorting his data files and sometimes attending to patients with less serious injuries. All Vehicon miners, he observed, as he walked further in to the room's centre. Knock Out was moving to get some surgical equipment when he turned his head and noticed Soundwave. 

"Soundwave? You're a rare sight in here. Do you need something?" he asked rather hastily, likely wanting to get back to work as soon as possible. 

"Soundwave: wishes to enquire about voice box repair." hr explained bluntly, in an equal hope to get back to his own business quickly. 

Knock Out was confused and agitated, but he knew better than to outright complain in front of Soundwave. "Why would you need to know about-oh," Knock Out interrupted himself as he remembered that Soundwave just brought a mech with a broken voice box onboard. "Fine. But may I still ask why you want to?" he questioned.

Soundwave kept his answer simple: "Repaired vocaliser: will make communication simpler." 

Knock Out smirked a little at the technical term Soundwave just used, then conceded. "Alright then, you can search for ways of repairing voice boxes," he said in conclusion of their talk, pointing at the data terminal where Breakdown was. 

Soundwave nodded and walked over, plugging in with one of his feelers to make the process quicker. Breakdown simply continued with his own work and didn't speak, which Soundwave was happy to allow. He found a method suitable for Bumblebee's case, then abruptly unplugged and left the medical bay. While on his way back to his quarters, he picked up data from Laserbeak's visual feed. He analysed it and found that Bumblebee was now awake, making his steps faster in response. He now had the chance to properly interact with him, and he decided it would be best to do so early to ease potential anxiety.

*** ***

Upon entering, he first spotted Laserbeak and Ravage in the corner of the cabinet, a good hiding place. As he walked in further he found that Bumblebee was indeed awake, snuggling himself in the blanket he had provided. Soundwave smiled briefly underneath his visor, then refocused and pondered what would be the best approach to take. He didn't want to come across as a threat to Bumblebee, after all. He would need to make his presence and the atmosphere of the room welcoming to him. Removing his visor in Bumblebee's presence would be a good place to start-  
Soundwave's pondering was ended abruptly by a shriek from the berth. He immediately looked ahead and found Bumblebee staring directly at him, sitting up on the berth with terror-stricken optics.

Bumblebee's chest tensed up at the sight before him and his entire frame shook violently. Was this a nightmare, or some kind of punishment? The frame before him remained motionless for a time, as if analysing him. It definitely looked to be Soundwave. He knew next to nothing about him, other than that he was the Decepticon spymaster and had minicons to assist him. The lack of past interaction only made him more terrifying now. Soundwave took a small step forward, making him shake and tremble further. Assuming Soundwave planned to interrogate him, Bumblebee began frantically giving various bits of information on the Autobots, whatever he could think of. "Wait, please! T-the base is in Nevada, J-Jasper, in a missile silo." he explained in terror, saying whatever he could to keep from hurting again.

Soundwave gazed at him in sadness from behind his visor. The poor thing seemed to think he was about to be tortured. Soundwave just felt like holding the scared mech now, and began walking towards the berth. Risky, perhaps, but he doubted he could reassure him with only words at this point. Laserbeak and Ravage, meanwhile, looked on from the corner in concern.

Bumblebee shrieked once again as Soundwave approached, coolant tears beginning to drip from his optics. "No, I'll tell you! I'll tell you anything you want, just don't... please don't... " The drips became rivers, Bumblebee burying his face in the pillow and descending into quiet but violent sobbing and whimpers. Why was this happening? He wanted to make this stop, Why hadn't it? He was... about to be hurt, be tortured... he was about to suffer again...

...'Why hasn't it started yet?' he wondered, aware that quite some time had past with nothing happening. He kept his optics shut, but he could tell something was different. He was in a different position, though his head was still on the pillow, and felt what seemed like a pair of long and wide arms wrapped around him, covering his whole back. His frame from the neck down felt like it was pressed gently against something. Another frame, maybe? It seemed that way. His torso rubbed against a wider and bulkier one, while large pedes rested against his smaller pair, which only seemed to reach above their knees. He only noticed now that his crying had all but stopped. This frame beside him was so comfortable, it was even warmer than the blanket...  
As if noticing he had calmed down, one of the arms moved up a bit, and he felt a large servo with thin fingers on his head, stroking it. The size of the fingers made their strokes precise, feeling sensitive on his head. He couldn't help but snicker a little at the contact. 

A deep and soothing voice whispered above him as the servo continued stroking. "It's alright," the voice reassured; "You needn't be afraid. I will not harm you." 

Bumblebee didn't know whether to believe it, but he moved closer to the frame beside him to test the waters. 

"Please, open your optics." it continued, servo cupping his cheek plate and stroking near one of them as if responding to his action. 

He liked the feel of the servo there, smiling faintly, before complying and opening his optics. They widened at the sight which slowly came into view. It was Soundwave as he suspected, but he looked different, much less threatening. He was gazing down at him softly, and Bumblebee noticed he was lacking the visor face he normally had. Instead he saw a different face, one as dark as his visor, illuminated only by piercing indigo optics. He sighed lightly; just the optics were enough to make him feel more comfortable. Soundwave then brought his face closer, resting it on the pillow next to Bumblebee's, just above, before speaking again. 

"I am called Soundwave, though you may already be aware of that." He introduced himself in a gentle manner, not as formal as Bumblebee would have expected. 

"I'm...Bumblebee." he greeted slowly. He guessed by now that this was real, and Soundwave must have saved him on the cliff when he jumped. 

"You were in quite a bad state of mind when I found you." Soundwave recalled, thinking to himself over how ridiculously unlikely their encounter had been. Had he been a few metres away or ignored the alert he received, neither of them would be in this situation now, and Bumblebee would be dead. 

"I still am... " Bumblebee admitted; "But I'm glad you took notice. I honestly thought I'd never be able to talk about this with anyone."

Bumblebee's face then took a regretful expression as he remembered what he said while scared. "I just told you several things about the Autobots. That means you have to go and tell Megatron doesn't it?" he asked guiltily. 

Soundwave smiled. "Not necessarily," he replied; "Besides, you assume that I didn't already know most of those things." 

Bumblebee gave him a look of bewilderment. It made sense that Soundwave would already know, considering his job, but if so then why hadn't he acted on that information earlier? 

As if reading his mind, Soundwave then gave an answer to the question he was thinking. "Let's just say that there are people in both factions that are looking for a more peaceful solution to our conflict," he explained, Bumblebee reassured and sighing again in relief. Soundwave then posed a question to change the topic. "Are you comfortable with me being so close?" he asked in an offer to move in case he wasn't. 

In a move of pleasant surprise to Soundwave, Bumblebee wrapped his arms around his neck and replied "Yes, I'm fine with it. I've never been this close to another mech before. I'm a bit curious about it." Soundwave smiled and sat up, pulling Bumblebee into his lap and holding him there for a while, Bumblebee responding by nuzzling into his chest happily.

"He's finally coming round." Ravage spoke in satisfaction out loud, Laserbeak promptly nudging him. 

Bumblebee looked around the room in surprise before joining Soundwave in staring at the corner of the cabinet. "Who's there?" He asked, unnerved by the idea that someone had been watching them. 

"Come out now, you two." Soundwave told them. They obeyed, coming out of the corner and into full view before making their way to the berth. 

"Hello!" Ravage greeted cheerily as he jumped onto the berth beside Soundwave and Bumblebee; "I'm Ravage." 

Bumblebee adopted a more relaxed expression as he realised what was going on. "Oh, that's right, I forgot. You have minicons." he recalled as Ravage rolled over to make room for Laserbeak beside him, the other flying up and landing in the space provided. 

"I am Laserbeak." the bird minicon introduced himself to Bumblebee. 

"He's a handful." Ravage joked, then found Laserbeak looming over him, ready to pin him if he spoke something similar again. 

"Hardly as much as you, kitten," he retorted before facing Bumblebee again and explaining; "Ravage has large reserves of energy, and often gets quite jumpy. I frequently find myself 'settling' him when that happens." Bumblebee smiled in understanding while Ravage pouted in protest.

Taking note of the time, Soundwave informed the other three about it. "It is quite late now. We would all be best retiring for recharge until next cycle." he told them. Laserbeak and Ravage nodded, jumping off the berth and heading to their own in the other corner.

"We'll see you tomorrow!" Ravage called back, Bumblebee nodding as Laserbeak wrapped Ravage in his wings, and they both rested in wait for recharge to overtake them. 

Soundwave set Bumblebee back on the berth and watched as he lay down under the covers. Then he entered himself and lay beside him. "You should get some rest as well," he recommended; "I suspect this has all been quite eventful for you." 

Bumblebee nodded and edged closer to Soundwave. It felt strange to be readily accepting accommodation from someone he'd barely interacted with until now, but he put the thought aside and offlined his optics. He was still a bit confused, and he hoped Soundwave would explain more tomorrow.

Soundwave lay stroking Bumblebee's head for a while, musing over how he should approach the next cycle. He decided to divide the time he wasn't working between explaining more about Bumblebee's current situation, asking about what was troubling him if he was willing, and also offering to repair his vocaliser when there was time. It would probably be useful to contact the Autobots at some point as well, as they were likely in turmoil over Bumblebee's actions by now. That would take some time, and he would likely need to convince Megatron to allow it first. Having Laserbeak and Ravage accompany him when he was away would keep him safer onboard, so he made note of that too. Satisfied with his plans for next cycle, Soundwave placed his servo back to his side and off lined his optics alongside Bumblebee, in preparation for a recharge that they all needed after so many unconventional events.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This should do until the next chapter comes to me. This chapter sets up up how the rest of the fic will be developed, so I'll probably keep coming back to it for reference. I hope you enjoyed!


	3. もろせ (Fragility)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter twice. I had it all finished but then I accidentally deleted it. Thankfully I still had the plan, so I could reproduce it easily.
> 
> This chapter will introduce some new terminology used to measure time by Cybertronians. Some of the terms are common across Transformers fan fiction, others I simply made up. There is a list below.
> 
> Cycle-24 hours  
> Macron-1 hour  
> Micron/klik-1 minute  
> Nanon/nanoklik-1 second
> 
> Klik and nanoklik are more commonly used by Autobots. Those terms along with nanon are not used in this chapter, but they will appear in future chapters.
> 
> And that should do for the notes. This chapter is quite long, so I'm sorry if anyone finds that inconvenient.
> 
> Hiragana もろせ (morose) in title means Fragility or Frailty.

It was quite early, he noted, having just come out of recharge. The room was dimly lit, as it was set to be during lunar macrons, and there was little movement besides his own. He deduced that Bumblebee, Laserbeak and Ravage were still recharging, then sat down quietly on the floor, taking a meditation posture. It would be beneficial to spend a few moments in present awareness so that he would be prepared for the cycle ahead, and the new responsibility he had lain upon himself. Hopefully Bumblebee would be awake when he was finished so that they could talk, but it was more important that he received a good recharge after the turmoil of last cycle. Soundwave closed his optics, entering a meditative state.

Roughly a macron went by, Soundwave having passed through several stages of awareness in his meditation. Upon exiting, he saw Laserbeak and Ravage just coming out of recharge as per usual.

"Mrrgh, I don't want to yet... " Ravage complained to himself, still slightly disoriented and wanting to stay in the warmth of Laserbeak's wings. 

"Too bad, kitten. I'm waking now as well." his counterpart replied having overhead him. He helped Ravage out of their berth, the two of them having barely set foot on the floor before they noticed Soundwave staring at them with a light smirk. 

"You both look a certain way while waking. I believe a suitable description would be 'cute'?" he spoke endearingly, receiving snickers as a response since 'cute' wasn't common in his vocabulary. 

"Pleasant recharge, sir," Laserbeak said as an early cycle greeting; "And you?"

"Also pleasant." Soundwave responded. He then turned to the berth and saw Bumblebee still deep in recharge, indicating they would have to postpone their talk until later since his shift was to begin soon. 

"Heavy recharger, or do you think he's just tired from last cycle?" Ravage wondered as he looked as well. 

"I will assume the latter for now," Soundwave replied; "But we will come to understand his recharge patterns more the longer he is with us," He stood up and summoned a touchscreen to check activity on the ship, then placed on his visor and turned to face his minicons. "When Bumblebee wakes up, make sure to fulfil any needs he has and monitor his condition." he instructed, both of them nodding. 

"Understood. We'll contact you if anything comes up." Laserbeak affirmed for them both. 

Soundwave nodded, pausing for a moment, then left and deferred care of Bumblebee to them for the time being. As he walked, he felt concern over how Bumblebee might cope without him there. Hopefully his minicons could take care of him. This was a new instruction for them, but they would strive to fulfil it as much as they would any other. Confident that they could handle it, Soundwave continued on his way.

***

....Everything felt stiff. That much was obvious even before he opened his optics. That probably meant he'd had a good and long recharge then. He sat up, barely having time to glance around the room before Ravage noticed him and jumped over. 

"Hello!" he greeted enthusiastically; "How was the recharge?"

"It was...quite good, I think. Best I've had in a while." Bumblebee spoke in satisfaction. His recharges since living at the outpost had rarely been pleasant, and would sometimes get interrupted, so he was glad to have one without worries or pressures for once. 

Ravage then ran over to Soundwave's cabinet. "Soundwave keeps energon and the like in here if you want any." he informed his new roommate.

Bumblebee nodded and gave a "Thank you." in response. Before he walked over, he spotted Soundwave's other minicon Laserbeak perched on the data pad shelf with a duster. 

"All finished, now," he called down to Ravage; "Are you done yet?" 

Ravage gave a firm nod before turning his head in Bumblebee's direction. "Look who got up as we were finishing." he showed his counterpart, who flew over and landed on the berth next to Bumblebee. "We were dusting while you recharged," Laserbeak explained, before asking "How are you feeling after last cycle?" 

Bumblebee thought the question over for a few moments, Laserbeak watching patiently. "I'm a bit better... but still feeling sad." he admitted after a while, Laserbeak giving a small nod in appreciation. 

"Alright. Just remember to ask if you need anything." he offered, Ravage promptly coming up beside him. 

"That goes for me too." he reaffirmed; "We'll both be here to help if you need us." Bumblebee nodded appreciatively, then went over to get the energon that Ravage mentioned while the minicons remained on the berth. 

"You did very well with the dusting today," Laserbeak chirped in praise of his counterpart; "Would you like to stay up here for a while?" I won't give any surprises to deter you this time, provided you don't roll around too much." Ravage's face beamed, and he immediately leaped over to where Bumblebee's frame had been and curled up there. Laserbeak looked over at him with a smile, suspecting it would have been impossible for him not to stay up here given his enthusiasm. 'Just you wait,' Laserbeak schemed in his mind, his smile having morphed into a smirk; 'It won't take long until you get carried away, then I'll be free to run my wings and talons all over you, my kitten,' Then he turned to look at Bumblebee, who was ingesting energon from a vial. 'That is, provided our new roommate remains stable.' he concluded his thoughts, refocusing on their task.

***

It was close to mid cycle now, and Soundwave had just received an update from Ravage that Bumblebee was awake. He resolved to go to his quarters as soon as his shift was over so they could talk sooner. While Laserbeak and Ravage could do it themselves through their connection, Soundwave considered it best to speak in person so that Bumblebee would be more comfortable. He was essentially his caretaker now, after all. Soundwave noted that he had about two macrons left before his shift was over. He worked at a concentrated pace, neither too slow nor too fast, making sure that the servers were intact and the ship security was active. The smaller screens were set to pick up transmissions from the service, since such transmissions and similar data were an important part of his work as communications chief. He continued in that manner for one macron and fifty microns, leaving him with ten more before his shift was over. As always, he plugged a feeler into the console to create a backup of the data in his own frame, and his minicons in turn. Before he left, he caught a glimpse of Megatron standing at the other end of the bridge, reminding him that he was going to give copies of his recordings to him soon. It would be prudent to do so during their typical conversations, but right now his first priority was checking on Bumblebee's condition. He knew the times during a cycle when Megatron retired to his own quarters, so he decided to speak to him then as an alternative. He sent a message asking to meet Megatron at the beginning of late cycle, then left the bridge, heading back to his quarters.

***

Quite a while had gone by now without Bumblebee seeing Soundwave yet. Laserbeak told him that he had to leave earlier for his work shift. He understood that, communications chief probably being a busy job to have, but he still felt restless. He held his face in his servos and groaned. Soundwave had took notice of him last cycle. He had the time for him; he saved him from a horrible decision. Soundwave had given him some hope again, and he wanted him there so they could talk together. Even if it was just manipulation as he feared, he was glad just for the company. The longer he was away the more he overthought, and it was becoming too much to bear...

"Hey, you doing okay? You don't look so good." a concerned voice came from his side. He glanced over and saw Ravage looking up at him. 

"I...no, I guess I'm not." he admitted. 

"Like we said: just say if you need any help," the feline minicon consoled, placing a paw on Bumblebee's thigh and focusing his gaze on him compassionately; "Is there anything you want to talk about?" 

Bumblebee looked up for a moment, unsure of what to say. Laserbeak noticed and flew over beside him. 

"You don't need to hesitate around us," he assured him; "We're just as willing to listen as sir would be." Ravage placed another paw on him in encouragement. 

Bumblebee faced back down towards them. "I'm just... anxious to see Soundwave again. I want to talk some more." he explained after a while. 

"You want to know why he brought you here." Ravage deduced, Bumblebee nodding in confirmation. 

"We could just tell you ourselves, but it's probably best that you hear it from sir himself." Laserbeak suggested, Bumblebee nodding again. 

"Yes. That would be best for me." he agreed, though his expression remained glum.

Laserbeak then had an idea to communicate their openness to him better. "You should know, Ravage and I often help each other when upset, so we're not just saying things to you. Consolation is familiar to us both," he began while moving over towards Ravage, who watched him curiously; "For instance, if Ravage here was having a bad cycle, we'd sit down and discuss it, maybe work out some solutions together." 

Ravage nodded in agreement to Bumblebee, before noticing the smirk growing on Laserbeak's face. He anticipated what was about to happen, but didn't move away for Bumblebee's sake. 

"Of course, there's also more 'direct' ways of cheering him up, often done after a talk or before. Shall I illustrate?" Laserbeak snickered while pouncing on Ravage and nuzzling him. 

Bumblebee looked on confused, but Ravage reassured him. "Don't worry, I'll be fine. I enjoy this, really." he managed to say before yelping in mirth as his paw was rubbed by one of Laserbeak's wings. 

"I'll keep it short since we're just demonstrating," the bird minicon decided, voice then growing more sinister; "But we often do this for far longer, and more vigorously." Ravage descended into uncontrollable laughter as Laserbeak brought his other wing and talons into the foray, digging in to his paws and under plating. 

Bumblebee gave a small laugh of his own and watched. They kept going for about two microns before Laserbeak stopped, turning to face Bumblebee with a smile while Ravage remained down sighing. "That looked fun," Bumblebee applauded; "And... it was quite the cheer up too... thank you." 

Those last words were sincere, Laserbeak could tell, and there was a deep satisfaction in his expression that wasn't present before. 

"Whew, glad to hear it!" Ravage called as he jumped up in rapid recovery, moving beside Laserbeak. 

"Energetic, isn't he?" Laserbeak quipped in amusement before concluding; "Anyway, the point is you have three people to talk with if you get upset, not just one." 

Bumblebee nodded in gratitude, elated to have such good company. Just as they finished speaking the door opened, Bumblebee's optics pleasantly widening as Soundwave entered the room.

*** ***

"That's a better reaction," Soundwave commented upon seeing Bumblebee's smiling face, retracting his visor. "How do you feel?" he asked in a more concerned tone as he walked over to stand opposite him. 

"Much better, thanks to these two." Bumblebee replied while pointing in Laserbeak and Ravage's direction. 

"I see," Soundwave acknowledged, turning his head towards the deployers; "Would you like to tell me what happened?" 

Ravage eagerly began explaining the event: "Bumblebee was afraid because he hadn't seen you in a while, so we came over to show him that he can talk to us as well." Laserbeak nodded to confirm his partner's statement before giving his own comment. 

"We also gave him a 'demonstration' of how we often help each other, if you know what I mean." he added with a smirk, Soundwave returning a similar expression in understanding.

The minicons made room for Soundwave and he sat down next to Bumblebee, who immediately edged closer. "I apologise for leaving you so abruptly." he spoke while placing a servo on his shoulder.

"It's fine, no need," Bumblebee brushed it off; "I understand that you're a busy mech." He moved even closer to Soundwave, their frames touching, and the other moved his servo from his shoulder to the back of his head. He felt so much safer, calmer, with Soundwave there. The larger mech simply smiled, happy to let him stay close if it helped ease his mind.

"I'm still a bit... afraid." Bumblebee admitted after a while, Soundwave shifting so his head could rest on his chest. 

"Of me, as well?" he wondered. Bumblebee stayed still for a while before responding. 

"Only in case I'm being manipulated." he answered honestly to him about his worries, which Soundwave appreciated. 

"Yes, I can understand why would fear that. This is an unfamiliar situation for you after all." he mused to him, wrapping his arms around Bumblebee's back. 

"If I am, then I don't really mind," Bumblebee murmured after a moment; "I just...want some company for a while. I don't care if it isn't genuine." His voice was shaky while saying that, Soundwave surprised he didn't cry. 

"Encountering you on that cliff last cycle wasn't something I expected," he recalled in an honest appraisal of his emotions; "Watching you break down like that, there was no time to be forming plans or ideas. You looked so scared and distraught. All I could think of was saving you. To even consider trying to use you after that... " 

He stopped, beginning to shake a little himself. Laserbeak and Ravage watched closely, as it was rare to see Soundwave's emotions expressed so visibly without his own awareness.

"I guess not then. Not if you're about to start too," Bumblebee laughed faintly, Soundwave smiling and quickly regaining his composure. Bumblebee had wrapped his arms around Soundwave as well. They didn't reach all across his back, being smaller, but the action was no less appreciated for it. "Maybe I'm just worrying too much. Like I always do." He dropped the matter, satisfied for once that his fears were unfounded.

Soundwave allowed them both a moment before speaking again. "Am I correct in assuming this worrying happens frequently?" he wondered, picking up on Bumblebee's last words. The smaller mech nodded, but quickly changed the subject to what he'd been wanting to ask for a while. 

"Can we talk about what I'm doing here first though? I'll explain more afterwards." Soundwave agreed, looking over to his minicons who nodded in encouragement before explaining. 

"I will give you the official explanation first. You are onboard the nemesis in my custody as a pet, which I arranged with Megatron. Only I can approach you freely."

"Pet? That sounds interesting." Bumblebee pondered, taking it far better than expected; "I'm guessing that's not all there is to this though?"

Soundwave nodded and continued: "Correct. My personal reasons relate to the worries mentioned earlier. If you are willing, I want to work with you to find the sources of those worries and other issues we find, and help you overcome them." 

Bumblebee locked his gaze on him, optics widening as far as his frame would allow. "You...you mean that?" he whispered hopefully. When Soundwave nodded to confirm, he shot his arms around him in a tight hug. "T-thank you...I thought t-that I'd never g-get the time, that I'd be s-stuck like this f-forever," he babbled out, tearing up. But for a change, they were happy tears. Soundwave's face formed a solid compassionate expression as he returned the hug, pulling Bumblebee up to his shoulder and nuzzling him. The minicons watched in excited happiness for them both, Bumblebee's euphoria eventually settling into a content feeling and expression. "Yes. I want you to help." he consented. Soundwave smiled and placed him back down, then they both noticed Ravage coming over teary-eyed.

"I'm so glad to see you happier like this," he squeaked, Laserbeak snickering at how adorable he sounded. "Um, can I-" he interrupted himself and glanced at Soundwave, who predicted his question and gave it to Bumblebee.

"Ravage would like to sit between your legs," he explained; "He often does so with me when feeling emotional. It's also his way of signifying a friendship." Bumblebee nodded almost reflexively in his good mood, Ravage eagerly moving between his legs and curling there with a bubbly expression on his face.

"I probably should have told you earlier; he can get overly emotional sometimes as well," Laserbeak quipped in amusement. He flew to Bumblebee's shoulder and perched on it. "Now we can welcome you fully into our abode. I hope we can help with your recovery." Laserbeak rejoiced, nuzzling the side of his head.

"I hope so too." Bumblebee responded happily, Laserbeak returning to the berth surface.

Soundwave stayed in his quarters for a while longer, showing Bumblebee the locations of various tools and items. Laserbeak and Ravage, meanwhile, were doing a quick patrol to fill in any details Soundwave might have missed during his shift. Bumblebee was particularly interested in Soundwave's data pad collection, each one a repository on some area of Cybertronian knowledge. There were two pads that most caught his attention: one containing a map of Cybertron before wartime along with detailed descriptions of its ecosystem, and another which was a large collection of Cybertronian tales and stories. Soundwave let him take both from the shelf to read at his own leisure, his minicons entering the room after Bumblebee did so. "You're both just in time," he acknowledged before facing Bumblebee again; "Now that we've finished browsing, I need to go and see Megatron in his quarters, as I arranged earlier." 

Bumblebee nodded and replied "Okay, I'll be fine in the company of these two." while pointing towards Laserbeak and Ravage, who smiled in gratitude.

"Then I will leave now. Take care, I will try to return shortly." Soundwave bid them all goodbye before placing his visor on and heading to Megatron's quarters.

***

He didn't have to walk very far, Megatron's quarters only two corridors away from his own. He stood by the door when he arrived and knocked. It opened quickly, the large form of Megatron standing in the doorway. 

"You're early." he growled lightly, a common reaction whenever he was surprised. 

"Only by a few microns," Soundwave chuckled; "Think of it as a precaution in case we take a while." Megatron then gestured for him to come in and he did so. The room was a modest one for the leader of the Decepticons. It was of the same size and dimensions as Soundwave's and contained many personal effects of Megatron's, most of them mementos from his time as a gladiator. There was an appropriately sized berth placed against the back wall, as well as a desk in the corner filled with encrypted data pads. They mainly contained information on Decepticon intelligence and activity, the type of things Megatron would share only with Soundwave. He sat down by the desk and began sorting the files, gesturing again for Soundwave to come over and assist. Anyone who thought Megatron didn't work himself would be surprised to find out what he did in here, Soundwave thought.

"Before we get to your business here, I would like to ask how you are doing with that new pet of yours," Megatron began; "Has your work schedule been affected?" 

Soundwave finished organising a file set before replying. "Not significantly," he responded in recollection of the cycle so far; "I have ample time to tend to him each cycle, and my minicons take care of him when I am away, so my work schedule remains the same." 

Megatron grunted in satisfaction, then picked out some more files for analysis. "Very well then. Although, I am amused by some of the terms you use. Most would not think of you as this considerate." he laughed mildly, aware that Soundwave was viewed as stoic and aloof by the Nemesis crew. Soundwave shook his head in disregard of the assumption before speaking again.

"While on the topic of Bumblebee, I have been concerned about how the Autobots might react to the events of last cycle." he stated honestly. He saw no point in hiding his thoughts around his friend, a trait which both pleased and frustrated Megatron depending on the context. 

"Oh, and why might that be?" he asked, clearly agitated but not unwilling to listen.

"I wish to contact them," Soundwave continued bluntly; "This may provide an opportunity to improve relations, or at least to cease activity from the Autobots." 

Megatron grumbled for a while, turning the idea over in his mind. "Fine. I'll postpone it for consideration." he answered, unnerved by himself. Soundwave tended to bring out a more reasonable side of him when they were together, something he had thought he was incapable of given his past and present. It scared him since it suggested he had lost something of himself, hence why he asked Soundwave to be his advisor in the first place.

"I believe we should discuss my reason for being here now," Soundwave shifted the topic; "You expressed interest in receiving some copies of my recordings last cycle, so I have brought a set from the period of the Decepticons' formation to give to you." 

Megatron's optics widened and he turned to face Soundwave, postponing his work. "So soon? I was not expecting such a prompt fulfilment. Thank you." he rumbled in gratitude. 

Soundwave uploaded the audio files to Megatron's personal data pad on his berth, then turned to face him again. "I hope you will find it helpful, Megatronus." he said playfully, Megatron chuckling in embarrassment at being called by his former name. 

Before Soundwave left, Megatron asked him one more question: "I suspect you will be repairing the former scout's voice as well?" Soundwave nodded. "Then do as you will." he brushed it off with no quarrel; "He's your responsibility after all. I will see you next cycle." 

Soundwave nodded again and left the room, heading back to his own quarters satisfied with Megatron's conduct.

*** ***

When he returned to his quarters he was intrigued to not find Bumblebee on the berth as before. Instead he saw Ravage sitting on the floor as if in wait, then noticed that Laserbeak was missing as well. 

"Those two are in the cleaning chamber," Ravage predicted his thoughts, as he and Laserbeak were adept at doing; "He's teaching Bumblebee how to use it." 

Soundwave nodded in acknowledgment and retracted his visor. He strode over to the chamber door and knocked, Laserbeak recognising him and opening it. Inside he saw Bumblebee by the controls, gazing back at him with a bashful expression, and smiled at how cute he looked. 

"So, do you remember what I said about operating the chamber?" Laserbeak called over to Bumblebee, who nodded to confirm. "Okay. Feel free to ask if you do forget though." he concluded, flying out and leaving only Soundwave and Bumblebee in the cleaning chamber.

"Do you want me to leave?" Soundwave asked in case he wanted privacy. 

"No, it's okay. I'd rather you stayed in case I mess things up." Bumblebee replied near instantly as he reached for the controls. 

"Is that the only reason?" Soundwave teased, picking up on his eagerness for him to stay, and Bumblebee blushed. 

He continued adjusting the controls, looking over at Soundwave for approval before turning the chamber on, and did so when he nodded. Small white lasers poured out of the ceiling and walls, creating a tingling sensation when they hit his frame. "This...feels nice." he thought out loud while moving to the centre of the chamber. Cleaning chambers were a good method for removing dust and dirt from a frame without needing to use liquid. Humans would probably come up with a name like 'laser shower' for it if they learned of it. 

Soundwave stayed by the wall and watched as Bumblebee cleaned himself, standing by in case he was asked anything. 

"There was only one cleaning chamber back at the base," Bumblebee recounted while Soundwave listened; "We often ended up having to share all at once. It was very noisy." 

Soundwave huffed in amusement, but then noticed Bumblebee's frame beginning to shake. 

"I was afraid of them," he trembled; "I wanted to satisfy them, to not let them down. It gnawed at me every cycle and made me terrified of failing, which I often did. I wanted to leave, but it was the only life I knew and I had nowhere else to go. The only way out was... " 

He trailed off, falling into the mournful sobbing that Soundwave was now familiar with. If he could get to this state just by overthinking, then it seemed clear that there was a mental health issue present. He walked up to Bumblebee and wrapped his arms around him to communicate his presence. "Shh, I'm here. Cry as much as you need to." he soothed, pressing their frames together. 

They stayed in that position for five more microns, Bumblebee eventually stopping and looking up with worn out optics. "I could... so easily enter that state again without you here." he lamented. 

Soundwave knelt down so their faces were level and stroked his cheek plate. "Bumblebee... " he called solemnly. After a while the yellow mech calmed down, Soundwave standing to full height again when he noticed.

"I was thinking about my voice box just now," Bumblebee told him after a moment; "You might be surprised to hear that I don't get as upset about that as everything else." 

Soundwave's interest was caught and he listened intently. 

"You see, I don't remember exactly what happened. I was probably traumatised too much. Everyone at the base told me it was done by Decepticons, Megatron I think, but my memory is blank there." 

Initially shocked a little, Soundwave found it more understandable as he thought it over, an event as painful as that being a likely candidate for suppression. "The Autobots...are correct, I am sad to say," he stated remorsefully; "Your vocaliser was torn out by Megatron during an interrogation. I was not present at Tyger Pax, and when I learned of it restraining my anger was difficult." 

Bumblebee looked down sadly, though he wasn't surprised at the event being true. "He could have done more than that... " he muttered in depression before realising what he was saying. "No! That won't help! That won't solve anything!" he cried out against the thought. 

Soundwave embraced him again, waiting a moment before continuing: "I reprimanded him for it. While I forgave him over time, it is clear he has some anger issues, so I have become his advisor. He will not interfere with our affairs, so I plan to repair your vocaliser at some point, if you want that." 

Bumblebee looked up and nodded appreciatively. "Can you finish the cleaning for me?" he asked meekly, Soundwave agreeing and adjusting the controls.

The lasers barely came out now, leaving Bumblebee confused, but Soundwave simply walked behind him. He removed a dust cloth from a rack near the controls and came back over to Bumblebee. 

"It would be more thorough to include some manual cleaning as well." he reasoned to him before starting, beginning with his back. 

Bumblebee sighed as his back was rubbed with the cloth on every area. Soundwave also used his servos to pry off smaller dirt pieces, Bumblebee welcoming the contact. His face flushed when his aft began to be cleaned as well. Soundwave finished with his back after a micron and moved to his front, cleaning his head first. Bumblebee's optics shut reflexively each time the cloth brushed against his face, Soundwave amused at the reaction. Finishing up with his neck, he then moved to the torso, Bumblebee shivering as his chest and abdomen were worked on. "Ah! C-careful! I'm sensitive there!" he yelped as the cloth rubbed his ribs. He relaxed once more when the cloth was moved to his arms. Soundwave adjusted the controls before continuing, the lasers pouring out like before. Bumblebee purred as his legs and pelvic plating were then rubbed with the cloth. 

Soundwave finished after cleaning the top of his feet, then stood up to examine him. "The cuts on your chest are more visible now." he observed, Bumblebee looking down to see.

"Yeah, I did those myself," he recalled sadly; "I was having a bad cycle, and I resorted to it out of shame. Shame for not living up to Autobot standards. Eventually I decided it wasn't worth it, but I ended up thinking worse ideas in its place," He shook his head and focused on Soundwave. "Please continue," he beckoned; "I don't want to dwell on it." Soundwave nodded and cleaned him over once more.

"There are some areas to clean which are harder to reach," Soundwave spoke while examining Bumblebee again; "Brace yourself; I have a method for doing so." 

Bumblebee wondered what he meant. "What do you mean? It looked like you went over everything, unless you're talking about-whoah!" he exclaimed as Soundwave lifted him off the ground effortlessly. He extended what looked like two pairs of tentacles from his chest and upper back, stepping backward as they wrapped around his limbs and held him in place. 

"Hmm, quite lightweight," Soundwave chortled to himself before explaining; "Do not be alarmed; these are my feelers. They are cables used for computational work, though they have many other uses, like holding you in place while I clean you." 

Bumblebee gave a mock pout and expressed interest. He could appreciate their size difference more like this; the tall dark mech had him helpless before him, yet he also felt safe. It seemed he trusted Soundwave enough now to feel comfortable when exposed. Soundwave moved his feelers to hold Bumblebee's servos above his head and spread his legs out wider, Bumblebee realising that his targets were his lower feet and underarms. "Umm, those areas are sensitive too." he bleeped nervously, Soundwave merely giving a deep chuckle. 

"It won't take very long. Besides, you've seen Laserbeak and Ravage do similar things before. Just relax and enjoy the moment, as we have been doing." he consoled before beginning. 

Bumblebee barely held back his giggles as Soundwave rubbed his underarms with the cloth, doing each individually. A similar reaction was produced when his lower feet were cleaned, both mechs realising they were enjoying the activity. Once Soundwave finished, he moved over to the controls again. "What are you doing?" Bumblebee bleeped again nervously.

"Setting the laser output to maximum." he replied nonchalantly, Bumblebee gasping; "It will make rinsing you a quick process, and I suspect you will find it most 'stimulating'." His last words had a clear mirth to them as he increased the output to full, the lasers shooting out of the chamber walls and making contact with Bumblebee's entire frame. 

He laughed helplessly and heartily as each of his sensitive areas was hit, bewildered by how much he was enjoying it. Soundwave noticed and walked over behind him.

"Something tells me you enjoy being at my mercy," he murmured teasingly, Bumblebee unable to deny it; "Perhaps 'pet' isn't so inaccurate a term for you." He moved his servos and extended his feelers to provide tickles of their own, Bumblebee practically howling in laughter. The climax of their cleaning session continued for one more micron before Soundwave turned off the lasers, releasing Bumblebee and moving over to his front. "Are you alright, Bumblebee?" he asked in case he overdid it. 

Bumblebee was preoccupied with noticing an increased temperature in his frame before responding. "Yes, I really enjoyed that." he beamed up at him happily. Before they left, Bumblebee touched Soundwave's servo, who correctly interpreted it as him wanting to hold hands and placed his servo in his own. Soundwave then unlocked the door, both of them going back out to the berth room.

They noticed Laserbeak and Ravage by the cabinet as they walked out, who barely hid their amusement on seeing them holding hands. 

"We could hear you in there just now." Ravage informed them chuckling. 

Bumblebee looked slightly embarrassed, but Soundwave paid it no heed, gesturing for him to go over to the berth. They both walked over, the minicons following behind them. Once they had all sat down on the berth, Soundwave went over an observation with Bumblebee. "What we experienced in the chamber before has indicated more clearly that there may be a mental health issue present with you," he began, Bumblebee concurring; "I am no psychiatrist, and I hope we can find you one in future, but I do know several methods of coping with anxiety and the like." 

Bumblebee nodded and enquired more about the psychiatrist question: "Is anyone else here suitable?" 

Soundwave went over possible candidates among the Decepticons in his mind before replying. "Knock Out is a combat medic, so I am not certain he could be of much help for your particular issue," he analysed; "Shockwave is a possibility. He is mainly a physical scientist, though I have known him to study psychology as well. He may be the closest candidate I know of, but unfortunately he is on Cybertron at present."

"Shockwave?" Bumblebee wondered cautiously; "I've never heard many good things about that Decepticon." 

Soundwave then took the time to reminisce over the scientist, remembering what he valued: "His actions can be ambiguous at times, but so long as he is provided with logical reasoning he is relatively harmless. I find convincing him to take little effort, but that may be due to my own familiarity with logic more than anything else." 

Bumblebee nodded in a careful trust, accepting the possibility.

An idea then came to Soundwave: "While on the topic of Shockwave, he once invented a device called a cortical psychic patch. It was modelled after my own telepathic functions and feeler anatomy, hence I am quite familiar with how it works. I believe it would be most useful for you." 

Bumblebee made sure he was listening, Laserbeak then joining the conversation. "It's basically a way of linking minds," he explained; "When two heads are connected with cables, the patch enables a person to look into another's mind, and the other way round if needed. It would let us address any issues you have directly." 

Bumblebee thought about it carefully, unsure whether to go through with it. 

"You don't have to agree," Ravage spoke up to him; "We won't do anything without your consent, and we certainly don't want to cause you any more pain." 

Bumblebee smiled to him, then faced Soundwave. "I'll consider it." he gave his answer, leaving it until later. 

Soundwave was happy to postpone, nodding and then checking the time. "Ah, it seems we have all been talking until late again," he informed them all; "It would be prudent for us to get some recharge now." Laserbeak and Ravage immediately moved to their berth, Ravage snuggling into Laserbeak's wings once they were in it. 

"What about those coping methods you mentioned earlier?" Bumblebee recalled as he lay down. 

"I can introduce you to some of them next cycle if you wish." Soundwave offered while he came down beside him. 

"Can I stay close to you?" Bumblebee asked, Soundwave smiling. 

"Just ask whenever you'd like to." he murmured comfortingly as he pulled him close. He shifted so that their chests touched, and Bumblebee sighed happily as his frame was covered by Soundwave's. 

"Mmm... " he purred under the larger mech, their frames rubbing together so nicely in this position. After a moment his frame heated up, but Bumblebee was too deep in recharge to notice. 

Soundwave had noticed, but left it aside for now, soon slipping into recharge with Bumblebee underneath him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing this twice made me quite familiar with it. The original was a bit longer, but I think it reads better like this. Thank you for reading.


	4. 苦境 (Predicament)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting from this chapter the story will include some sexual content; best to notify readers at the beginning so it's expected. This took less time than I thought it would considering my inexperience with such material. Once again the chapter is a bit long, though not as long as the last one.
> 
> Kanji 苦境 (くきょ-Kukyō) in title means Predicament.

The mood around the base had been somber since the past two cycles. No one felt like talking much, not that Optimus could blame them. They had all searched frantically when they came back, until Ratchet discovered that the ground bridge had been used. The coordinates pointed to a high cliff in Wyoming, and they soon realised what Bumblebee had done. Everyone lamented in their own way: Ratchet was having more outbursts than usual and often cursed himself, while Arcee had become near silent. Bulkhead was taking it particularly badly, blaming himself and the others a lot and crying when he thought he was alone. He had often felt protective over the scout, though he never got much chance to show it, so the suicide was weighing down on him heavily. And as for Optimus, he could only regret and mourn for not having enough time to talk with Bumblebee. He would rather a vulnerable mech like him hadn't been dragged into the war at all, but he had little control over recruitment procedures; the Autobots had always been desperate for troops.

And yet despite all their grief, they were still gathered in the command centre as they were during every early cycle. With the lack of a familiar yellow frame in their midst, Optimus was hardly in the mood to give a proper briefing. 

Neither were the others, as evidenced by Bulkhead's abrupt speech. "Are we gonna be here long? I really wanna just get this over with." he questioned with mild anger. 

Optimus tried to reason with him: "I would rather not be following normal procedure either, but so long as there remains a threat of Decepticons on the planet-" 

He was cut off as Bulkhead snapped, ignoring him and going on a tirade. "Look, I can take news of a teammate being shot down by cons!" he shouted in lament; "I can take accidents during combat or being captured! But who can I blame for this, other than me and all of us together? Poor kid... dammit, I wish Wheeljack was here... " He turned his head away and started fidgeting, Optimus deciding it was best to leave him alone. 

He then noticed Arcee coming up to him. "Optimus... " she began, her first time speaking in many macrons; "I don't think any of us have the morale to continue fighting right now." 

She spoke calmly, but Optimus could tell she was in grief like Bulkhead. Optimus nodded sadly in concurrence, then turned to Ratchet for his view. 

He found him looking back as if expecting before he entered the discussion. "Bulkhead's got a point, Optimus," he opened slowly; "It's much easier to cope with a death when you can just blame it on your enemies. But there were no Decepticons involved in this, just us. Fighting now would just remind us all of our scout's loss." 

Optimus then turned to look at the ground bridge alcove, where Bumblebee would have driven out on his last journey. "Then... I shall not press the matter further," he relented, acknowledging that he felt similar to them; "But I do not know how long we will be allowed to mourn. There just doesn't seem to be a peaceful resolution ahead... "

Brreep! The Autobots were startled to hear the base computer alert them about a message. Ratchet attended to it and checked its transmission location. "It's... from the Nemesis... " he informed Optimus in shock, who nodded in a signal to have the file opened. An audio recording played, the voice unfamiliar to all of them.

"Bumblebee is alive. He is onboard the Nemesis. Please contact the ship if possible."

***

He awoke later than usual, sitting up on the berth and hearing his minicons rise as well. No matter, he had multiple ways of centring himself. He could simply engage in a moving meditation on his way to work. He turned to look at Bumblebee, optics widening with a chuckle at the sight he was met with. The yellow mech was leaning close to his frame with an exposed and pressurised spike. "Well, it was likely inevitable after our intimate moments last cycle." he mused out loud, the minicons coming to the berth in curiosity. Bumblebee had implied an attraction to him previously, trying to stay close whenever they were together. They had spent long moments in frame to frame contact last cycle, which calmed him effectively, and Soundwave was now accustomed to comforting him in that manner when he wished for it. Sleeping together was clearly another factor, add to that Soundwave's willingness to be intimate as well and-  
He felt a bulge at his pelvic plating and gazed down, seeing his own spike elongated as well. He chuckled again; it seemed he had the same feeling towards Bumblebee. His minicons shared his amusement when they reached the berth to see both of the erect spikes.

"He'd be startled if he woke up now." Ravage purred, Laserbeak noticing his tone.

"I hear mischief from you. Did you expect this, kitten?" Laserbeak asked, not for want of an answer but merely to explore his partner's behaviour. 

"Are you saying you didn't?" the feline teased in retort. Laserbeak huffed and shook his head to concur with Ravage, the two exchanging smirks over the matter and their anticipation of it.

Soundwave caught their attention with a wry smile, sharing the moment with them."Are you going to talk with him about this?" Ravage wondered, Soundwave giving it some thought.

"I would rather discuss the topic as it comes up," he answered after a few nanons; "Our first priority should remain helping him to manage," Ravage and Laserbeak nodded, Soundwave standing up and preparing to leave. "You remember what to do while alone with him, I presume?" he checked, the minicons nodding. Soundwave gave another in return, but before he could leave he received a message from Megatron.

"There has been a major energon leak near your area. You are advised to stay in your quarters until sanitisation is complete." the message played through the inbuilt loudspeaker in the room. 

Soundwave looked back down to the berth, facing Bumblebee. "This is unexpected, but not unfortunate," he commented on the new turn of events. Now there was more time for him to spend with Bumblebee this cycle; they could use it to discuss issues in greater detail, also Soundwave could give him a better introduction to his coping techniques if he wished. He decided to use some of the extra time to meditate, but before doing so he noticed his minicons preparing to clean the room as usual. "You two aren't under any obligation to do that." he spoke lightly to them. 

They just continued while Laserbeak responded. "Simply a habit, sir," he told him; "It keeps us busy when not on patrol or night watch, and I believe the benefits to the room are obvious. Besides, Bumblebee will likely appreciate it." 

Soundwave nodded in agreement and left them to clean; he was grateful of the things they did for him outside of their typical duties. He offlined his optics and began to meditate for a while. Perhaps Bumblebee would see him like this when he woke up, he considered before concentrating.

*** ***

'Nngh, that's so nice. Please, keep doing that... what?' He woke up slowly from the strangeness of his dream. That was odd. He usually expected nightmares while recharging, not such a pleasant feeling all over him. His recharges seemed to be improving since he wound up here...

His thinking was interrupted when he noticed Soundwave on the floor near him. He was sitting cross legged and didn't seem to acknowledge him. 'Is he meditating?' Bumblebee speculated. It was a topic that interested him, though he didn't know much about it. Maybe it would help manage his condition a bit? He decided to ask Soundwave later when he was finished. Bumblebee found himself staring longer than he intended. Just having Soundwave near made things more bearable; so long as he was there he felt like he could handle living again. It didn't hurt that he had a nice frame design either...

A twitch at Bumblebee's pelvic region roused him from his daydream, compelling him to look down. The frightful jump he made alerted Soundwave and the minicons, who turned to face his direction. He sat with his back against the wall on the berth, his spike unsheathed and fully erect in front of them. "Why is my spike out?" Bumblebee cried out loud. He felt just as embarrassed as scared with the attention he had attracted.

Neither Soundwave nor his minicons showed surprise, the dark mech only standing and climbing on the berth while the other two followed. "Do not worry yourself," he comforted while sitting next to him; "I awoke to find you like this before. It is not uncommon." 

Bumblebee was astonished; had this really been happening during his recharge too? He looked up trustingly at Soundwave, though he was still afraid. 

"It happened several more times as well," Laserbeak added while he and Ravage joined them on the berth; "We glanced sometimes while cleaning and saw it pressurised. It's really no big concern to us." 

Bumblebee took note, cuddling up to Soundwave to calm himself. 

"It won't settle if you do that," Soundwave laughed mildly, but allowed him to regardless. He was right; pressing against his frame just seemed to make the spike throb more. Bumblebee pulled back, Soundwave focusing on him with concern. "If it helps you to know, the same thing is occurring with my own spike," he told him, Bumblebee calming some more at the thought of Soundwave sharing his issue. "Do you want any help with it?" he offered, not expecting a yes considering how alarmed the other was. 

"I... not yet. I'll just wait for it to die down for now." he answered quietly, still having trouble thinking straight.

Soundwave thought it best to switch the topic. "I have been thinking, would you like to have your vocaliser repaired this cycle?" he proposed; "There is currently a commotion onboard the ship, but there should be time for it afterwards." 

Bumblebee faced him and paid attention.

"It will involve us walking to the medical bay, so be warned that we would likely encounter other personnel on the way." he clarified, Bumblebee taking time to consider the proposal. 

"Alright, but I'm a bit nervous about going out." he consented after a moment. Soundwave smiled, then was called by Ravage. 

"Say, this energon leak has taken up most of your work shift." he commented while checking the time on a touchscreen, Soundwave moving towards him and looking to confirm his statement. 

"Energon leak?" Bumblebee enquired behind them, Laserbeak then coming over to answer. 

"That's the reason sir is still here," he explained; "Seems like it's taking a while to fix." 

Bumblebee smiled to thank him, then noticed that his spike was back under his panel. 

"You see? No big concern." Laserbeak reiterated his previous words cheerfully, Bumblebee nodding to signify his improved mood. The bird minicon then folded one wing over his frame in a bow before flying off to do more housekeeping, Bumblebee giggling at the formal gesture. He turned to Soundwave and Ravage again. 

"Presumably there will have been some mild security disruptions onboard," Soundwave inferred while bringing up his own touchscreen next to Ravage; "I will engage in some compensatory work for a short while." 

Ravage noticed Laserbeak working on the room and closed his touchscreen, giving Soundwave a smile in goodbye before running over to help his counterpart. 

Soundwave then turned to face Bumblebee, the yellow mech moving to sit next to him closely. "You might wish to read for a while," he suggested; "It should take your mind off things until you are ready to talk again." Bumblebee nodded and walked over to the data pad shelf, while the minicons came over to the berth. 

"We're about to tidy over here now," Laserbeak told Soundwave, who raised himself off the berth while still working with the touchscreen. He moved to the wall near Bumblebee, the four mechs diligently performing their respective activities as the time passed.

About ten microns passed by, Soundwave then receiving a message from Megatron on his touchscreen. 

'Soundwave, I fear that sanitising the leak will take at least another macron, so you won't be able to conduct your shift this cycle. I apologise for the inconvenience. There are too many tasks for me to speak with you in person at present, but you should know that I have granted you clearance to contact the Autobots when you wish to. Be careful while doing so, my trust remains low.' 

The message ended there, Soundwave filing it and replying with a quick 'thank you.' message. Perhaps Megatron had been paying attention to his recordings, he wondered, then prepared a suitable message to send to the Autobot base. He decided on an audio message: "Bumblebee is alive. He is onboard the Nemesis. Please contact the ship if possible." he recorded using his own voice before saving the file. He looked over to see if Bumblebee heard him, but he was too engrossed in his reading to notice, so he decided to show it to him later and ask if he wanted it sent. He closed the touchscreen, satisfied with his alternative work, and walked towards Bumblebee.

He noticed him coming and commented on some new information he'd learned. "I didn't know Cybertron had that many Insecticon hives underground before the war," Bumblebee enthused; "These ecosystem files are fascinating."

"Yes, the planet's environment was quite diverse before the fighting started," Soundwave mused in response, happy to see him enjoying himself. "How do you feel now?" he asked in a change of focus. 

Bumblebee switched off the data pad and placed it back on the shelf, moving closer towards him. "I'm not as shaken up now," he replied calmly; "I won't be as startled if it happens again." He touched their frames together to illustrate his words, Soundwave smiling and taking one of his servos in his own. "Can you tell me any more about the vocaliser repair I'll be having?" Bumblebee enquired after a moment, Soundwave quickly recalling the data in his mind before responding. 

"It will likely take a macron or longer to complete, and you may need to refrain from speaking for a time." he elaborated, Bumblebee nodding in understanding. 

Then he suddenly winced at seeing his spike pressurised again. "Again? I thought... but we've only been close a few kliks!" he cried, not as frantic as before but still trembling. Soundwave moved so they were closer, Bumblebee reciprocating and not caring if it prolonged the erection. 

"This is going to get quite irritating for you if it continues... " Soundwave predicted. His voice was laced with concern, but also had a teasing quality to it, making Bumblebee blush a bit. 

The minicons had noticed by now and came over, happy to see Bumblebee taking it a bit better than before. 

"I've... had thoughts about you... " Bumblebee admitted to Soundwave after a moment; "But I didn't think they'd develop into this so soon!" 

The larger mech continued to hold him, pondering how to ease his predicament. "Have you thought about masturbating to release the tension?" he asked, Laserbeak and Ravage snickering to themselves for a moment before refocusing. 

"I never really did that much," Bumblebee replied, then reminisced over his past experience; "I at least knew what self-servicing and interfacing were, but Autobot barracks were always so crowded. I was too afraid to service myself in case I was caught." Soundwave gave a light chuckle before speaking, confusing him. 

"It likely wouldn't have mattered if you were," he stated dryly, Bumblebee getting further perplexed until he spoke again. "Self-servicing is common among all Cybertronians, soldiers or otherwise. It can be done in private or with one or more partners. The second case is often called mutual masturbation." 

Bumblebee looked up at him in interest. "Mutual? As in I could do it with others without any shame? With you?" he asked quietly, Soundwave nodding. 

Ravage then came towards him to help him understand. "It's fine, really!" he encouraged; "Shame shouldn't even need to come into it. We're all adults here after all." 

Bumblebee's mood improved; yes, he was an adult, though probably quite a bit younger than Soundwave. Maybe it would be good to try it. He turned to face the minicons and asked a related question: "If you don't mind me asking, do you two engage in anything like this?" 

Laserbeak and Ravage both gave wide smirks. "I don't think we've ever gone many cycles without it." Laserbeak commented mischievously. 

Bumblebee smiled at the answer, turning back up to face Soundwave who was watching him patiently. "I like the idea, but why don't we leave it till late cycle?" he suggested. 

"If that is what you wish," Soundwave agreed; "It would likely be the most appropriate time for us-"

He was interrupted by the loudspeaker. "The energon leak has been sanitised. All personnel may resume activity as normal." This time it was Starscream speaking instead of Megatron, likely due to him being busy as he indicated in his message before. 

Soundwave decided to take the opportunity now available and turned back to Bumblebee. "Would you like to have your vocaliser repaired now?" he proposed. Bumblebee nodded, his spike having depressurised again. Soundwave placed his visor on and they walked to the door. 

Bumblebee wasn't afraid of him with the visor on anymore, now that he was acquainted with the mech behind it. They both left the room to head to the medical bay while Laserbeak and Ravage stayed behind.

Laserbeak remained on the ground for a moment, Ravage wondering if he was lost in thought. "Hey, something up?" he asked cheerily, Laserbeak raising his head and turning towards him with an unnerving focus. 

"Kitten, when was the last time we interfaced?" he shared his pondering bluntly, Ravage left briefly surprised. 

"Err, I think... maybe eight cycles ago?" he estimated; "We've been quite busy, so it's hard to tell precisely." Laserbeak then suddenly covered him with his wings and moved closer. "Um, Laserbeak?" he uttered, excited and uncertain what his partner was doing. 

"Ravage... " the avian minicon called affectionately; "Have we been holding out that long?" He began to nuzzle him around his head and neck, the feline sighing contently. 

"It's fine," he replied with equal affection; "We both know constant interfacing doesn't define a relationship; I'm happy just for the feelings we share. Besides, we've still been intimate with all the tickling," They both shared a laugh, then noticed their panels heating up. "Though I could do with some attention now that you've brought it up." Ravage inferred. 

Laserbeak nodded and held him with his talons, flying with him to their berth. "Now then, let's release some of our own tension." he trilled mischievously while setting him down, Ravage purring and shivering as he began.

Bumblebee stayed close to Soundwave as they walked through the corridors, shuddering a little. He trusted that he'd be safe so long as he stayed with Soundwave, but there was still the off chance that a Vehicon or someone else might try and make a move at him. So long as he had the Autobot insignia here he was a potential target. He winced to himself as they continued walking; they'd only been out a few microns and already he was worrying about war related things again. He shouldn't have been involved in this in the first place, why had any of this even happened-  
Bumblebee managed to stop himself, relieved. He considered how he might resolve the issue rather than dwell on it. Soundwave was taking him to the medical bay, so maybe he could try something in there. 

They arrived at the door, Soundwave turning to Bumblebee before they entered. "Bumblebee: well?" he asked in monotone, surprising him. 

"Yeah... " he responded dubiously; "I almost had that problem again, but I managed to stop myself. Why are you speaking like that, by the way?"

"Monotone voice: used in public," Soundwave answered; "Real voice: private. Reserved for people Soundwave is close to." 

Bumblebee nodded, grateful that he viewed him in that manner. The door to the medical bay then opened. 

"Soundwave: often uses recordings of other voices instead," he added; "Quickens conversation when desire to speak is not present." Bumblebee laughed quietly, then they walked into the medical bay.

Knock Out and Breakdown looked quite busy, half of their patients being Vehicons afflicted with energon burns from the leak before. It was simple to treat, but it could get irritating in large numbers. 

Knock Out finished treating one of them before noticing Soundwave and Bumblebee by the door. "Oh, Soundwave," he greeted, noting the yellow mech beside him; "Am I right to assume you're here for that voice box repair considering the guest appearance?" 

Soundwave nodded and played a recording of Megatron: "Try not to take long." Bumblebee looked up at him amused. 

Knock Out picked up a data pad and walked closer to them. "I don't plan to," he replied to the recording; "I'm too busy with these Vehicons to waste time right now," He directed the pair towards an empty operating table, Bumblebee lying down with Soundwave standing at the side. Soundwave uploaded the repair file he found two cycles ago to Knock Out's data pad for him to assess. "Hmm, you picked out a good method. This should take only a macron or so provided I'm careful," he approved. He went away to gather the necessary tools for the operation and quickly came back. "Now this will require some precautions," Knockout guided Soundwave through the procedure; "I'll need to work on some sensitive locations in the neck, so we'll need to put him in stasis before I can work. If it goes smoothly, the operation itself should take half a macron. Then he'll need to spend the other half in stasis still to allow his systems to adjust." Soundwave nodded, turning to Bumblebee for his approval. 

He consented with his own nod, but then made an additional request. "Would it be possible to remove my insignia as well?" he questioned, pointing to his door-wing and upper chest. 

Knock Out widened his optics in surprise. "What? why would you-wait, why am I complaining?" he stuttered, deferring to Soundwave who focused his attention on his 'pet' lying on the table. 

"Bumblebee: certain?" he asked to clarify. Bumblebee nodded firmly, then rested his head back. 

"Alright then. Nothing I can't do," Knock Out accepted, turning to face Soundwave; "You must have been treating your pet well for him to be asking this." Soundwave just turned his head back to Bumblebee and didn't respond. Knock Out activated the table's stasis inducer so Bumblebee fell unconscious, then began the operation.

'...What? What's all that noise?' Bumblebee wondered, regaining consciousness slowly. His vision returned, and he saw Knock Out and Breakdown a few tables away from him. 

"I keep telling you that the type 4 patches are better than type 8 for treating the burns!" Knock Out grumbled to his partner in a scolding. 

"I would have used those, but there's so many patients coming in that we've ran out of the damn stuff!" Breakdown blurted back in defense. 

Knock Out checked the supplies and found that he was right. "Oh. Alright, sorry Breakdown. I'll go fetch some more." he apologised before leaving. 

Bumblebee turned away satisfied; some medic's knew when to stay calm at least. He turned to his left and saw Soundwave standing beside him, probably having stayed in the room the whole time. 

"Time elapsed: one macron and two microns," he informed him. Soundwave then played a recording from Knock Out: "That should do it. He shouldn't speak for about half a macron when he wakes to allow it to settle. After that he can make as much noise as he wants." 

Bumblebee nodded in appreciation, Soundwave helping him off the table. As he rose, he noticed his frame lacking the Autobot insignia it used to have. He looked up at Soundwave in relief, who stroked the side of his head. 

"Bumblebee: can worry less about war now." he commented with care. 

Knock Out then walked over once he noticed Bumblebee up. "Glad to see you both well," he acknowledged; "Now I just need you to sign some files and then you can go." He handed them a data pad, both of them signing it and handing it back. They waved back in gratitude as they left, Knock Out doing the same before quickly moving to address another patient. 

As the pair walked back to Soundwave's quarters, Bumblebee felt much safer without an insignia. He heard Vehicons murmur about it as they walked past, but paid no attention and continued walking beside Soundwave while smiling to himself.

When they entered the room, they were intrigued to find Laserbeak and Ravage in their berth. Ravage was wrapped in Laserbeak's wings and seemed to be panting beneath him. 

"Ah, we finished just in time," Laserbeak chirped to him before facing Bumblebee and Soundwave's direction; "How did the operation go?"

"Quite well, I believe." Soundwave replied in his real voice, Bumblebee nodding in agreement. 

Ravage then panted more heavily. "Laser... beak... " he gasped, his counterpart turning back to face him while Bumblebee wondered what was going on. 

"Don't fret, kitten," he murmured; "It's getting late now. But I have many plans for you in the next few cycles if you're still pent up." He nuzzled him affectionately before turning his head back again. 

"It seems you two have had some tensions of your own." Soundwave commented knowingly, Bumblebee realising what had happened after a moment. He was surprised everyone here was so open about these things. 

"Would it be permissible for Ravage and I to take an earlier recharge?" Laserbeak requested, Soundwave nodding to approve. "Thank you Soundwave-um, sir." he stuttered. 

His creator gave a mild chuckle at his slip up. "You don't have to call me anything other than my own designation. Ravage isn't so formal." he told him endearingly. 

Laserbeak just nodded and tucked himself in alongside Ravage. "Thanks, but once again it's just a habit." he concluded their talk, resting and focusing on Ravage once more.

Soundwave and Bumblebee left them to recharge, walking further into the room. Soundwave picked out a data pad and turned to Bumblebee. "Why don't we read together until the repairs settle?" he offered as he retracted his visor, Bumblebee smiling in agreement. They went to sit on the edge of the berth and began reading from the pad. 

It was the Cybertron map pad again, Bumblebee noted as they read through some ecosystem files together. These things were so fascinating to learn about; did Soundwave really have the time to read these with his job? A little more than half a macron passed before Soundwave took his optics off the pad and looked at him. 

"I think enough time has passed now. Would you like to try out your voice?" he suggested. 

Bumblebee touched his neck and moved his glossa around his mouth before complying. "You mean like this?" he asked back with fully functional vocals, shocking himself. A deep smile formed across Soundwave's face, while Bumblebee was overcome with emotion. "I'm speaking... not just with beeps but with my own voice!" he cried in pleasant awe. He wrapped his arms around Soundwave in a deep cuddle, the larger mech returning the action. "Thank you... " he whispered graciously, tearing up a bit. 

Soundwave pulled him up closer to his face. "Bumblebee, I'm so happy to see you regain what you lost," he spoke compassionately. "I must say, your voice sounds rather androgynous, neither overly masculine nor feminine. It is rather unique." Soundwave commented as they cuddled, Bumblebee laughing mildly. 

He didn't realise, but after a moment he had begun to place small kisses on Soundwave's neck. Soundwave just watched him until he looked up and realised, jolting out of his arms and falling on the berth with a large blush. 

"Not bad," he chuckled in praise of the smaller mech lying before him; "Do you want me to reciprocate?" Bumblebee blushed even harder, but then noticed his spike erect once more.

He panicked for a brief moment but quickly calmed. "It's alright. Nothing to worry about," he assured himself, Soundwave glad to see he could handle it now. He sat up and faced him again, a nervous expression on his face. "You were right. This is going to be a problem if it keeps up." Bumblebee muttered, finding it more annoying than scary now. 

Soundwave moved closer and their frames touched again. "If left unchecked it can be irritating," he elaborated on the topic; "But managed properly, erections can be quite enjoyable to experience." 

Bumblebee locked optics with him, aware of his trail of thought. "Would you be willing to do that... mutual masturbation thing with me?" he requested, a bit embarrassed. 

Soundwave took him in his arms and nuzzled him. "Of course," he accepted; "Perhaps you will be more confident to do it on your own afterwards as well." He set Bumblebee down on the berth, lying next to him and gripping his spike with a servo. 

"Ahh... " Bumblebee gasped at the contact. 

Soundwave examined his frame to be certain he was comfortable, then began to pump the spike slowly. 

Bumblebee began moaning in relief and rolling his head on the pillow, relaxing into the pleasurable sensation while Soundwave looked on contently. After a few nanons the pumping sped up, one of the servo's fingers stroking the tip of the spike. Bumblebee whined happily while his face flushed, hardly believing he'd worried about this so long when it felt so good. After a while he noticed a large amount of heat emanating from his frame, looking up at Soundwave in concern. 

"It's okay," he reassured him; "Just relax and let it happen." 

He complied trustfully, feeling the heat build up more. Eventually his frame started convulsing, the heat centring on his spike as he overloaded with a soft whine.

Soundwave released his spike and lay down beside him, Bumblebee snuggling close. "Do you feel better now?" he asked. 

Bumblebee took the time to register the pleasant feeling in his frame before replying. "Yeah... that was amazing." he responded, still gasping a bit. 

Soundwave pulled the covers over them. "Usually I would suggest cleaning after this," he spoke quietly; "But perhaps we should just rest for now." 

Bumblebee nodded groggily, reckoning he would recharge well with this feeling. "Maybe this can be the first method to help me cope," he joked, Soundwave huffing amusedly. Bumblebee thought for a while, then made a request: "Could you give me that kiss you offered now, please?" 

Soundwave's optics widened, but he accepted and placed their lips together for a few nanons. 

"Not bad." he giggled as the larger mech pulled away, mirroring his words to him before. Soundwave just smiled, the two resting together for a while.

"I forgot to ask you about meditating," Bumblebee recalled after a moment, Soundwave facing him to listen; "I saw you doing it when I woke up. Do you think it would be useful for me?"

"If you are willing to make the effort required," he answered; "Meditation can be useful for settling the mind, but one shouldn't expect much change in the first few attempts." 

Bumblebee nodded and pondered it for a few nanons. "I'll keep it as an option then." he decided, like he did with the cortical psychic patch.

"I almost forgot something as well," Soundwave mentioned while he had the opportunity; "I have made a message to send to the Autobots, stating that you are alive." 

Bumblebee perked up in surprise and paid attention. 

"I have received clearance to send it," he continued; "Would you be alright with me doing so?"

"Yes! please do!" he consented immediately, Soundwave sending the file he saved earlier. "They must be so upset over me now," Bumblebee reflected solemnly; "I didn't consider how they might feel during that cycle... " Bumblebee was saddened as he thought, Soundwave deciding to interject in case he broke down again. 

"It won't do you good if you start blaming yourself," he told him in consolation; "You were distraught. There is no faulting you for what you did in that state of mind." 

Bumblebee calmed from his words, pulling himself close. "Thanks. I just hope they're okay. You've done so much for me Soundwave." he whispered gratefully, only shedding a few tears. 

Soundwave stroked his cheek to soothe him into recharge. "Rest now, and remember: you will always find help somewhere if you ask for it." the dark mech crooned. 

Bumblebee gazed at him blissfully in gratitude, his optics soon going offline as he slipped into recharge. 

Soundwave took some time to think before resting with him. This cycle had been quite the detour in several ways, he reflected, but not in a negative way. Bumblebee's voice was now repaired, and they had successfully dealt with what could have been a troublesome issue. Satisfied, he prepared for recharge alongside Bumblebee, the thought of the new level of intimacy they shared easing him into it.

***

Optimus mulled over the message sent to the base worriedly, as did the other Autobots. He had never heard a Decepticon with that voice before. 

"Do you think it's a trap, Optimus?" Ratchet questioned beside him. 

"I do not doubt the possibility," Optimus replied; "But if there is any chance that Bumblebee is alive, we need to investigate." 

He turned to Arcee and Bulkhead behind him, who nodded in encouragement. "Make contact," Bulkhead said almost demandingly; "Even if it's a trap, we should at least take the chance. We owe the kid that much, at least."

"It's all that's been on our minds right now," Arcee concurred; "We may as well see it through now that there's an opportunity." 

Optimus nodded in acceptance, then turned back to the computer, setting up the system to make contact with the Nemesis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm satisfied with how this chapter turned out, and I hope the mature content I included can complement the character relationships and the story. Hopefully it hasn't done the opposite and detracted from them instead.
> 
> I'm starting to notice character development better the more I write of the story. Laserbeak for instance seems to be becoming more elegant with each chapter. I've also decided to remove the 'Implied' from the Laserbeak/Ravage tag now, since this chapter pretty much confirms their relationship.
> 
> And that's all I can think of to say for now. As always, thank you for reading.


	5. 恐れ (Fear)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My fluff pot is in operation again! This chapter ended up much more detailed than I thought it would be. I just developed so many suitable ideas to include in it and worked on it for quite a while. The result: this chapter is long, as in over 10,000 words long. I don't recall ever writing so much.
> 
> Kanji 恐れ (おそれ-osore) in title means Fear.

"Hmm, this keeps taking up my attention," Megatron sat on the edge of his berth, reaching to grasp a memento, and began fiddling with it. It was an old shoulder plate, probably broken off from one of his opponents during a gladiator match. Having something to touch helped him focus better and promote deeper thought, which he most certainly needed after all he had learned. Listening to Soundwave's recordings had alerted him to many things he had forgotten, verifying his fears that he had lost the essence of the Decepticon movement. He groaned in frustration, setting the shoulder plate on the floor. Had he really veered so far off course? By now he could admit that fighting the Autobots had turned into an obsession, one that seemed to have consumed him and blinded him to his original aims. Looking back, hadn't he and Optimus wanted the same thing anyway? "Screaming pit, this has all turned pointless!" he vented, trudging over to his desk.

Megatron began file examination work earlier than usual, in an effort to shave off the irritation growing in him. As he worked, his mood stabilised, and he soon regained focus. He didn't recall going a cycle without having the Autobots on his mind, though in large part due to Soundwave he was no longer fixated on eradicating them. The recent acquirement of Bumblebee also opened more room for negotiation, and while he was still wary of making contact he concluded that it might be worth a try, especially if it could end the war in the Decepticon's favour...

"No, just end the war," he rephrased out loud. Any 'victory' gained now would be fleeting in comparison to the losses suffered. Time for both factions would be better spent rebuilding after so much damage. He stopped working, standing up. It would be time to brief the officers soon. Before leaving, he took a quick look at a photo on his data pad. It showed himself and Soundwave standing next to each other in the gladiator arenas, at the end of their first match and first meeting. He remembered that time fondly; Soundwave was the only opponent in the pit to truly drive him to his limits. Their first fight ended in stalemate, earning one another's respect. They had many more matches after that as per the crowd's request. Megatron would win some and lose others, his relationship with the future spymaster improving after each bout. Even now, Soundwave remained the only opponent besides Optimus Prime capable of defeating him. Perhaps he should ask if they could spar together sometime. It might help with his recall, or at least make for good stress relief. 

He placed the data pad back down and exited his quarters. Standing in the corridor, he replayed an excerpt of one of his speeches that Soundwave recorded. "In these pits there are no distinctions between us, no castes or social statuses, no wealthy or poor, no haves or have-nots. There are only people, their skills and their merits. Likewise, my vision which I now share with you is of a Cybertron without the restraint of caste, a place where all may know the freedom that comes from achievement through merit rather than arbitrary status. Let these words be spread as widely as the width of the Rust Sea, as high as the towers of Tarn and Iacon! Let us awaken the conscience of the council so that future generations need not suffer as we have! Rise up, and our cries will attract more fellows who wish to see a better future! Rise up, and we will make our collective voice loud enough to shake our world! Rise up!" Megatron stopped the recording there, a solemn but proud smile enveloping his face. As he walked to the bridge, he hoped it was still possible to realise that vision. He would at least try; he owed that much to Soundwave, Optimus, all of his brethren in fact.

*** ***

"Ooh, he's adjusting to our wake up time, Soundwave." pined Ravage at seeing Bumblebee awakening at the same time he and Laserbeak were. He adored seeing Bee show signs of better health and make progress. It felt so exciting to have a new person to interact with after so long, and if his partner's shared reactions were any indication, Laserbeak felt the same way.

Bumblebee shifted under the berth covers and glanced around the room wearily, just managing to see Laserbeak and Ravage near the opposite wall. "Oh, hi." he croaked, only barely acknowledging them and snuggling into the covers. Was it early cycle already? He was still too groggy to think clearly.

A giggle from Ravage and snicker from Laserbeak helped rouse him only slightly out of his disoriented state. "Haha, you're like me when I wake up!" Ravage compared playfully; "Maybe I could 'help' with that," He held his mischievous idea in focus as he poised himself to pounce on the berth. Gently, of course, since he didn't want to startle Bumblebee to the point of fear. Laserbeak stared at him in slight worry, so he quickly clarified. "I don't mean any harm; just want to do something fun with the moment. Hopefully he'll like it."

Laserbeak paused briefly, then nodded slowly in approval. "Okay, but do something wrong and these talons are going to drive you wild." he warned, Ravage's frame shuddering at the thought.

Staring aimlessly at the wall the berth was placed against, Bumblebee barely registered Ravage's soft jump. He yelped when Ravage landed on the covers atop his frame, the feline smiling and walking towards his head on the pillow.

"C'mon, Bee. You may as well get up now, 'cause our racket will just keep you awake anyway." Ravage purred to the mech in the covers, his voice weaving a threefold string of reasoning, teasing and affection into Bumblebee's audials. He pressed his face against his, nuzzling Bumblebee while his paws stroked over his head. Ravage's purring intensified and his face beamed when Bumblebee began to shiver and giggle.

"H-hey, stop it," Bumblebee called up to Ravage unthreateningly, a laugh escaping him from the nuzzles. His request went unheeded as Ravage instead began to give quick licks to his cheekplates. "Ssstop, hahaha, R-Rahahahavage!" he pleaded, laughing louder as the minicon played with his head in a similar way to the domesticated cats humans sometimes kept. With the covers still on him he was helpless to remove Ravage from his frame. 

Ravage kept up for a micron before stopping, giving Bumblebee one last nuzzle before moving to the edge of the berth so he could sit up. "So, you like my wake up call?"

Bumblebee gave an appreciative nod in Ravage's direction, still a bit surprised but feeling pleasant and more awake. "I would've thought Laserbeak would join in." he commented while turning to face the avian minicon on the ground, who sent a soft smile his way.

"It was your first time on the receiving end of Ravage's antics, so I thought it best to watch in case anything went awry." Laserbeak replied logically, elegant in his speech as usual. As much as he'd enjoy sharing his and Ravage's bonding acts with him fully, it was necessary to keep Bumblebee's mental state in mind when interacting, as Soundwave made sure they were all aware of. He didn't need to worry about approval of that though, judging from Bumblebee's understanding nod.

"What satisfying sounds to hear." a familiar deep voice spoke near Bumblebee, startling him again. He whipped his head to face the centre of the room and found Soundwave sitting cross-legged on the floor, meeting his gaze with a wide smile.

"Wh-how long have you been there?"

"Throughout the entire event," Soundwave replied, becoming further amused at Bumblebee's embarrassed visage; "Quite entertaining, I think. A pleasant sight to be met with after my meditation."

Face flushing vividly, Bumblebee touched his back against the wall on the berth and turned away, embarrassed that Soundwave had been there all this time and he hadn't noticed. "Oh, stop it." he snapped endearingly, earning that familiar huff and chuckle that had a strange soothing effect. He looked back towards Soundwave, the focus and attention on the dark mech steadying him. Partly because of how funny Soundwave looked while sitting down, but he didn't voice that out loud.

Soundwave stood up, striding slowly towards the berth and sitting beside Bumblebee, whom appeared to have a rosy hue taking over his cheekplates now that he was closer. "You are improving," he observed, clasping one of his servos in his own; "Gradual, but still an achievement."

"Really? But we haven't even gone through any methods yet." Bumblebee wasn't sure what he meant. They hadn't gone through any practices like formal meditation in depth yet, let alone therapy, but somehow his ability to cope was increasing? Unless he meant...

Taking the time to admire the adorable look of confusion on his face, Soundwave allowed Bumblebee to think it through on his own. Once he saw the uncertainty leave him, he smiled and gave Bumblebee's servo a gentle squeeze to communicate that his thinking was on the right track. "Now you understand what I meant. Simply having others to listen to you will improve your health," He placed the palm of his free servo on Bee's chest, while moving the other's servo to his own. "Any problem can become surmountable so long as there are individuals willing to help with it."

A smile of gratitude graced Bumblebee's face, while his servo unfurled into a palm to mimic Soundwave's gesture. After a moment of silence, he noticed a peculiarity in Soundwave's behaviour and decided to enquire about it. "You always know what to say to make me feel better. Not that I don't appreciate it, but how do you manage to do that exactly?"

Soundwave folded his arms over his abdomen and looked up to the ceiling. "It is partly biological. I am what is called an empath, a type of telepath with a focus on emotions and thoughts that relate to them. Empaths can discern the mental state of those around them with greater ease than most other Cybertronians."

Bumblebee's interest was piqued, and the minicons on the berth poised themselves in preparation to contribute as they often did. "Empath? I've heard of telepaths, but I didn't know there were different types. Does that mean you can read my mind?" The possibilities of what he just heard unnerved him, but he wasn't about to jump to conclusions.

The reply was prompt. "Only if you wanted me to. I try to respect mental privacy where possible," Soundwave turned his face back to Bumblebee before continuing, in order to communicate his sincerity. "It is more diverse than simply reading minds, which can become straining if done for too long. More subtle and noninvasive discernment is possible, like greater accuracy at reading facial expressions and body sensations." He was satisfied to see Bumblebee grow less tense after his clarification. The minicons stepped forward to contribute as usual, so he and Bumblebee turned their heads to listen.

"We share the ability as well," Laserbeak spoke; "Though we're not as accurate with it as sir is. It's because of a program in all three of our frames that links us. You could have it too if you wanted to join our connection."

Connection? These two were sending more surprises his way by the cycle. He could really do with a crash course on minicon biology. And telepaths. How could such a connection be set up anyway? He'd probably need to get the required program uploaded to his frame, but wouldn't it require an adjustment of his networking functions as well, like through his nerves or processor? Or maybe all the data was just stored in the program so he could access it there. But then it would just be an uploading process and not proper data transfer between frames, wouldn't it? Bumblebee couldn't quite figure it out. In his pondering he hadn't noticed that he'd been staring down at the berth for a while, and remained that way until he felt something on his thigh.

Ravage had placed a paw on his thigh, as he did when Bumblebee was anxious previously. "Hey, don't make me climb up to that face of yours again." the minicon said affectionately. Bumblebee then looked up to see Laserbeak with a concerned expression, while Soundwave remained still and almost unnoticeable by his side, like he didn't need to get involved.

"Er, no it's okay I'm fine," he told them both with a jitter; "I was just thinking a lot about the connection you mentioned." Laserbeak gave a relieved smile, while Ravage rubbed his thigh with his paw satisfied.

"That's good. As I said, we're not as effective as sir is," Laserbeak replied; "We can explain more about it sometime later if you like. Sir will tell you more about telepaths and empaths if you're still wondering about that too."

There was something about the certainty and ease of interaction between these three mechs that felt so fulfilling to Bumblebee. Maybe joining their connection would be helpful. "Thanks," he responded after a moment; "I like learning new things, especially now that I have more time to. All I've been expected to know until now was how to shoot things."

"Like with those guns?"

Bumblebee's optics widened as far as they could. He barely registered the question as coming from Ravage before he brought his arms into view as if in a trance. An (unlock) message displayed itself on his HUD, followed by the sight of his servos being replaced by two double barrel pistols. He just stared, astounded that he had forgotten about them all this time, until his trance was broken by maniacal laughter from Ravage and Laserbeak. He placed the guns in his lap as if they were still servos and glanced around confused. He had weapons out and their response was laughter? Even Soundwave was giving a chuckle beside him.

"I'd almost forgotten until you mentioned shooting!" Ravage cackled in front of him, bashing the berth surface with a paw.

"Fancy us not even mentioning it for so long!" Laserbeak said between laughs in complement.

Giving a small sigh, Bumblebee returned to looking at his guns in his lap. Maybe it was a little funny that they'd gone unmentioned ever since he was brought here. Still, shouldn't they have had them removed in case he ended up a threat? Or at least to prevent accidents?

A servo rubbing his shoulder caught his attention, and he turned his head to face Soundwave. "It seems my test was successful then." the larger mech quipped, still donning the wry expression from when he was laughing before.

"Test?" Bumblebee was getting bewildered at how unfittingly calm everyone was acting over his weapons, but he trusted Soundwave to have an explanation.

"I wanted check how far your condition was affecting you, including your memory and recall, so I left your weapons alone to see if you would remember them." Soundwave spoke slowly, his expression more solemn. He hoped he hadn't caused any negative tension, though Bumblebee's expression looked more curious than angry or sad. In fact, he seemed to be thinking it over excitedly.

"I was too scared to remember when we first met, and ever since then I've been too happy... " Bumblebee looked up at Soundwave with an understanding nod. After a moment his face turned sadder and he cuddled up to him, deactivating his guns. "You could have all been hurt... " he murmured; "I know you're trying to help, but don't make it dangerous to yourselves to do so."

Soundwave wrapped his arms around his back, holding him gently. "I apologise," he spoke sincerely; "I shouldn't be so reckless with my curiosity, even if I have altruistic ends for it," He then tightened his hold in the way Bumblebee enjoyed it. "You have a kind spark, to be able to think of others after all you've suffered through."

"Thank you." Bumblebee replied, kissing his chest and receiving one to his head in return, before registering two familiar paws over his shoulders with surprise.

"You're not leaving us out are you?" Ravage questioned, holding on to Bee by his shoulders and hugging his back and neck. Laserbeak was in a similar position on Soundwave.

"Laughed enough now?" Soundwave teased them. He then looked down at Bumblebee. "What do you think? Would you like their company?"

"Alright, why not?" he consented; "But I'm a bit stiff here. Can we lie down?"

Soundwave smiled and lay them both down on the berth, taking the minicons with them. They stayed like that for a few moments, Bumblebee's processor whirring as it made sense of the situation. He was in a... group hug. Or better a cuddle, it feeling so deep. Granted it was easy considering two of the participants were minicons, but it was still a foreign sensation to him. It would have been embarrassing were it not so comfy...

"I'm going to forget my work at this rate," Soundwave chuckled to himself after a while, releasing himself and sitting up. The three mechs below giving discouraging moans almost had him laughing like before. "Later, I'm busy." he told them with a smile as he placed his feet on the ground and stood up.

The minicons treaded off the berth, remembering their routine cleaning and heading to get the equipment from the cabinet, while Bumblebee sat up and faced Soundwave. "What are we going to do about my guns now? Should I get them removed?"

"It would involve another trip to the medical bay. This particular cycle involves me working extensively alongside Megatron, so I won't be able to take you there for a while," Soundwave pondered alternatives for a moment, then suggested one. "You might wish to simply lock them manually for now. The climate is still hostile, so having a method of self defence would be useful until a peace agreement is reached. You'll find the option if you explore your weapon controls."

Bumblebee nodded and searched. As he did, he felt happiness from the idea that attempts at peace were being made. He was sure Soundwave was making a good advisor. Eventually he found the manual lock and activated it, relieved that his weapons wouldn't just spring out again if he thought of them too much. Soundwave nodded in approval once he was finished and moved to leave. Bumblebee waved at him, but before he was gone a thought occurred to him and he rushed to the door before Soundwave opened it and left. "Wait!" he called, Soundwave turning to listen; "C-can I have a job?"

Soundwave gave one of his rare surprised looks, while the minicons made sure to listen even while they cleaned. "A job? Are you certain? Any formal job will involve you working outside of this room, and there are few places as safe on the ship."

"I know, but I still feel like I should contribute something. I want be of some help, however small that is. If nothing else, I just want some way to repay you for everything you've done for me."

He looked determined, unlikely to relent, so Soundwave quickly scoured through outstanding tasks onboard and found a relatively safe job that Bee could carry out. "You don't need to repay me, but if you insist, there is a remote cargo hold onboard full of energon deposits. They were acquired some time ago and haven't been sorted into appropriate quantities for their size. No one has been known to use the room or even enter it for a while now, so it should be a safe option for you. I will monitor it when you work there." The immediate smile sent his way was encouraging. Bumblebee was certainly making progress to be even asking something like this.

"Thank you, Soundwave. Um... would it be okay if I started this cycle?" Bumblebee was still nervous to go out, but he needed to get used to this place eventually, so why not take the opportunity?

Soundwave thought for a moment. "If we go now, I can drop you off on the way to the bridge. Be warned that we will likely encounter Megatron on the way. He often waits for me when we work collaboratively."

Bumblebee felt more worried about his prospects if he was likely to meet the mech responsible for his formerly damaged voice. He'd always heard scary stories about Megatron, but maybe he wasn't so bad now that Soundwave worked closely with him? He wasn't sure what to make of it.

"We can come with you both if you'd like," Laserbeak called behind them. He and Ravage finished their cleaning early and came over. "We'll patch up any missed bits when we get back. Maybe it will be less daunting for Bee if we all go together."

"That's right. Don't give up just because the old scar face might be there." Ravage encouraged while facing Bumblebee. He really wanted to see him pull through, even if it involved a little break in routine.

After a moment of silence, Bumblebee locked optics with Soundwave and nodded cautiously, receiving smiles and returning nods as praise from the three mechs who would be accompanying him.

"Then let's go!" Ravage cried with enthusiasm, preparing to jump up to Bee's shoulders but missing his chance when Laserbeak perched on him instead.

"You had him in the group hug," Laserbeak reminded him; "It's only fair that we get a turn each."

Ravage gave one of his playful pouts and slunk over to Soundwave, jumping up and curling across his neck and shoulders while the dark mech shook his head at their silly 'taking turns' game. Placing on his visor, Soundwave opened the door and led Bumblebee through. The door's automatic lock activated behind them, and the four mechs proceeded on their way to the cargo hold where Bee would work.

***

'This early cycle is just too perfect!' Megatron's thoughts took a euphoric tint as he plodded down the corridors, a chaotic and telling smirk brandished on his face as he reflected on the last few microns gleefully. He didn't recall ever being informed of such outrageously fortunate events in any other briefing. It was rare to hear of positive developments in the current climate the Decepticons were in, and from all of his officers no less! He would have been satisfied just to hear that Knock Out and Breakdown had no patients for one cycle, but to then be informed that an enormous energon deposit had been discovered by Starscream and his seekers, of all people, elevated his mood to heights that wouldn't be lowering for quite some time. The deposit was in a remote location, in the region known as 'China', and had enough raw energon to sustain operations for well over an Earth year. Best of all it could be mined and transported to the Nemesis discreetly without fear of discovery by any large human population. There was always the Autobots of course, but the recent opening of their comms channel to the Nemesis network kept his hopes high; he'd have to thank a certain communications chief later. Megatron continued on his way to the corridor where they would be meeting, his uncharacteristically good mood unnerving the Vehicons he passed.

*** ***

They were walking a longer way than the last time. Even with all the company he had, Bumblebee still felt afraid. He trailed closely by Soundwave's side, slightly behind, while the minicons remained hitching a ride on their shoulders. Each corridor they passed through contained increasing numbers of Vehicons, indicating they were probably passing through the busier parts of the ship near the bridge. Bumblebee began to feel a great unease; would he have to pass through this busy area all the time? Was there any quieter route? Before he could get too upset though, he felt a wing brush against his neck.

"Are you getting scared?" whispered Laserbeak in his audials.

Bumblebee just nodded meekly, seeing no point in hiding it. If one of the three noticed something, they all did; he'd pieced together that much about them by now. The gentle nudge he promptly received from Soundwave, coupled with Ravage's focused gaze, only confirmed their nature further.

"Other routes available, will show them later." Soundwave spoke in monotone. 

He relaxed a little from that knowledge, but was still nervous, especially if Megatron would be there near the destination. How much further was it? At least they weren't attracting attention to themselves much; the majority of the crew seemed to know better than to bother Soundwave.

Noticing that the strained expression remained on his face, Soundwave slowed his pace to address Bumblebee's issue. "Slow down one moment. Take in your surroundings." he instructed, though the monotone made it sound rougher than he would have liked.

It felt daunting in his situation, but Bumblebee complied as best he could. He took his focus away from his mind and thoughts and outward to the world his optics showed him. He noticed the shape of the walls, floor and ceiling of the corridors, their colour and architecture. It was different from anything he had experienced before, oddly relaxing even, but it was difficult to maintain. His mind kept nagging him with his fears.

"Good attempt," Soundwave acknowledged; "Now include the people and the sounds they make. Watch the movements, listen to the steps."

Determined, Bumblebee brought the Vehicons into his vision, as much as his fearful mind urged him not to. He watched them move up and down the corridors, arms swaying slightly by their sides as their pedes and feet left the ground and came down again in a rhythm one after the other. He heard the distinct clomping sound that accompanied and characterised the rhythm, using it as an anchor to deepen his focus. After a klik or so he expanded his awareness to Soundwave and himself, feeling the close proximity of their frames as they walked. He listened intently to the steps: Soundwave's had a distinct sound, harsh and echoic, likely due to the design of his feet in comparison to the Vehicons. His own steps meanwhile resembled the clomping sound but were considerably lighter and quieter, owing to his small stature. With those things in mind, Bumblebee focused on the rhythm between their steps. He worked out that he took about two and a half steps to keep up with the pace of Soundwave's larger pedes, an irregular pattern but one that he kept aware of as they walked. Deeply ingrained in the practice, he was able to keep it up for a full three kliks, the anxieties he held previously diminishing.

Ravage shot one of his encouraging grins his way as they walked. "That was great!" he praised quietly in that friendly tone Bee was now familiar with; "Not far to go now. And don't worry if the cudgel's there; Megatron's no trouble so long as you take the right approach, and we've got good experience in doing that."

If any Vehicons were raising optics or murmuring, Bumblebee was too calm and relieved to care. The acknowledgement from Ravage was welcome, and he guessed from their bond with the minicon that Laserbeak and Soundwave were happy for him too. Had he just meditated then? He was surprised he managed it so quickly for a first attempt, especially with how he felt before. Soundwave must be experienced to have taught him a method so quickly, one which was appropriate to their situation as well. He wanted ask about it, but he left it for now to focus on walking in the other three's company. The corridors felt much less threatening now. Eventually they arrived in the area where the remote cargo hold could be found. It was almost void of people in comparison to the other halls, much to his satisfaction. They reached a junction where the corridor branched into left and right paths. They were about to turn left but then a door opened down the right pathway, the figure of Megatron entering the hallway and turning to face them. The Decepticon commander's optics raised at seeing the other mechs accompanying Soundwave, his gaze set particularly on the former scout. Bumblebee froze up briefly, feeling scared again and wanting to escape, but he quickly steadied himself. No, he shouldn't run away from this. It wouldn't do any good if he didn't expose himself to these situations, or he'd never learn to overcome them. Besides, he wasn't alone. He trusted that the other three would help him get through this.

"Here on schedule as always, I see," Megatron greeted Soundwave as he strode towards them; "Though I wasn't aware you were bringing company. Such behaviour is unlike you."

"I am attending to something I arranged with my charge," replied Soundwave in his own voice, surprising Bumblebee. It made sense as he thought it over, the two of them likely had a long history after all.

Megatron cocked his head, facing Bumblebee again. "Charge? You're quite protective of your pet then. I am left to wonder what conversations must take place between you." He took one last step and stopped, standing opposite Soundwave closely.

A strange mix of excitement and fear enveloped Bumblebee's frame at the closer proximity. Megatron was hardly trying to look intimidating, but his formidable stature gave him an imposing presence regardless, to him at least. He was only a little taller than Soundwave, but he towered over Bumblebee. It wasn't an uncommon feeling to him; it happened often whenever he encountered a significantly taller mech, like Optimus and Bulkhead back at the outpost. Around such tall mechs, he tended to find the size difference less intimidating and more comforting as he became better acquainted with them, like how he'd recently become accustomed to Soundwave. Megatron was still unknown to him though, so he kept on edge. At least he wasn't overly conscious of his height; he already had too many problems to be worrying about something so silly.

Before anyone could start speaking again, Ravage dropped down from Soundwave's shoulder and looked upwards at Megatron. "It's been a while, scar face." he said with a smirk, earning a huff from the silver mech.

A hint of mirth laced Megatron's reply, contradicting his words. "Watch yourself, feline. I'm still your leader no matter how acquainted we are."

"Like you even care anymore. You got tired of the formalities quite a while ago." came said feline's retort. Megatron was receptive to displays of wit and debate-like conversation, both of which he was eager to provide.

"Ah, but Ravage. You should at least prepare in the event that I start caring again." Ravage certainly had a good grasp of his psyche. Where possible, he never wasted the opportunity to make a game out of his conversations with Soundwave and the minicons. It kept his mind sharp and alert, like a mental gladiator match.

"I'll have to consider the likelihood of that first. But might I make you digress if we continue?" Ravage ended his speech there, sitting on his hind legs and assuming the role of a spectator. It had been short, but effective, and maybe Bee had gleaned something useful from it.

Megatron refocused his attention on Soundwave again. "So, Bumblebee, was it?" He glanced briefly at the mech he was referencing before continuing. "Where are you taking him? I don't suspect he will be coming with us."

"He is to work in the remote cargo hold with the unsorted energon deposits." Soundwave's reply was intentionally direct and authoritative, in contrast to his usual calm tone. He gave an anticipatory smirk behind his visor. If Megatron responded how he expected, this could turn rather comical, which would be ideal for getting Bumblebee comfortable here.

Unable to tell if Soundwave was luring him into something, Megatron kept his response cautious. "Work, you say? Interesting. Are you making him earn his keep, or is this more of a confidence building exercise?" He had another reason to be cautious than just the conversation. While he was far from the most compassionate mech in the galaxy, he could still appreciate that his newest crew member had an unstable mind considering his earlier suicide attempt. Hence why he left his status ambiguous: the lack of the 'prisoner' label was less antagonising and would reduce risk of harm, both to Bumblebee and the crew.

Ah, he fell into the trap perfectly. Soundwave masked his amusement as he spoke, his voice simple and unassuming. "No, he asked me for a job." Megatron's dumbstruck expression was priceless.

Any threat from Megatron had left Bumblebee's mind, and he was unable to contain a chest aching laugh upon seeing that face. It was just too funny. Laserbeak and Ravage seemed to think so too as they joined him. He continued to laugh for a while, until he noticed Megatron's crimson optics locked directly on him and abruptly stopped. His euphoria from the laughter prevented him from getting immediately scared, but he was still unsure what would happen.

The brief smile he received was odd, but a source of relief. "Well now. I see you're getting better already," He had anticipated being spoken to directly, but it still loosened his composure and he could only think to nod in response. "And your voice is functional once more. Do you feel any better with it back?"

The question took him aback. Megatron, the person who broke his voice in the first place, was asking if he felt better? Bumblebee didn't know where to begin answering that, instead turning to glance at the three mechs on and beside him. The faces of the minicons had turned deadly serious, while Soundwave's visor focused in front of Megatron seemed to be troubling the Decepticon leader. Were they expecting him to... apologise?

'Awkward... ' was the only word that Megatron's mind could use to describe this situation. He just dug a hole for himself, and he wasn't going to be allowed out until he did something to address his past actions. But what could he do that was appropriate? He didn't know what Bumblebee would want as compensation. Surely a simple apology wouldn't work... would it? He winced briefly and steeled himself to make an attempt despite his doubts. No excuses. He couldn't ignore his past actions forever. "I... am sorry, Bumblebee," he began, making no attempt to justify himself; "What I did to you at Tyger Pax was unbecoming of me. I lament having shown such a monstrous side of myself to you."

Bumblebee gazed down at the floor for a moment, unsure how to respond. His memory lapse made the event so distant, unremarkable. Could he give an appropriate response without a clear memory of the event? Would it be different if he did remember? The lack of excuses and simplicity of Megatron's words made his apology sound honest at least. After thinking it over he looked back up towards Megatron, deciding to leave the past where it belonged. "I forgive you," he spoke in full clarity; "I hardly remember the event anyway. I'd rather just move beyond it now."

Megatron sent a nod and a pained look his way, the crimson optics then gazing at one of his clawed servos. "I wonder if you would be so forgiving if you did remember... " He shook his head and adopted his usual commanding tone again. "As you said, we should move beyond it." He and Bumblebee were both pleased to see Soundwave and his minicons less tense upon finishing.

"Shouldn't we take Bee to the cargo hold now?" Laserbeak changed the topic.

Soundwave nodded and made an offer to Megatron. "Would you like to accompany us before I go to work with you?"

"Why not? You seem intent on gathering a group around you, after all." came his comrade's witty response.

Bee decided to interject. "I can't imagine it's as bad as the amount of people on the bridge every cycle." The subsequent barking laughter from the silver mech was a great encouragement.

"He's learning!" Ravage cried joyfully. They all set off soon after, heading down the left corridor on the short route to the remote cargo hold. When they arrived at the door, Soundwave entered the access code and the door opened. Inside was a large amount of metal crates, some sealed, while others were open with energon shards of varying sizes sticking out. The room itself was a dark grey in colour, illuminated by small rectangles of dim white light running across the edges of the floor and ceiling.

Soundwave gestured for Bumblebee to enter and he did so, familiarising himself with the new surroundings while Laserbeak removed himself from his shoulder and moved to perch on Soundwave's.

"You've been awfully quiet so far." Megatron observed. Usually Laserbeak conversed with him as eagerly as Ravage.

"I felt I should continue keeping watch on Bumblebee, commander." he replied. Maybe he took his tasks too seriously sometimes, but he usually knew if that was the case when Ravage called him out on it.

Megatron then addressed Soundwave. "I will walk on ahead to the bridge. Spend time briefing your charge if you need to, then meet me there. I have much good news to share with you." Soundwave's firm nod marked an end to their interaction for now, so he took his leave while musing over the last few microns.

The minicons moved in front of Soundwave once he left. "We'll do some reconnaissance on the ship then return to our quarters." announced Laserbeak.

Soundwave gave his approval. "Alright. I expect you back when I arrive there."

Before leaving, Ravage shot one last look at Bumblebee. "Bye! You'll find us in the room when you come back!" he called into the cargo hold, the yellow mech waving as he and Laserbeak sped away.

Soundwave entered the space a little, standing in the doorway to address Bumblebee. "Ignore the secured crates. All you need to do is sort the energon into the open crates appropriate for their size. Each crate has a chart showing what sizes of energon it is meant to hold."

Bumblebee nodded his understanding. "Are you sure I'll be safe in here?" he asked just to be certain.

Soundwave pointed to an embedded camera in the corner, something he wouldn't have noticed had it not been pointed out. "I control all security onboard, remember? I will keep watch in case anything happens." He walked in closer, standing next to Bumblebee and giving him a flash drive from his subspace.

Bee connected the drive to a port on the side of his neck, finding that it contained additional information on working with energon as well as the access codes for this cargo hold. He gave a quick "Thanks." as he gave the drive back, grateful to know Soundwave would be watching over him.

"Proceeding to bridge now. Will return here after work or if needed." Soundwave said in goodbye before leaving, the door closing behind him. That last sentence was in monotone again, Bumblebee noted with amusement as he began his new job.

***

Everything appeared to be proceeding normally. Well, as normal as the Nemesis could get at least. Working alongside Megatron was different from his usual tasks. It involved mobility outside of the bridge since there were many places to survey, and there were more social interactions involved. Megatron took him to do this work at least once a cycle, in which he functioned as a sort of 'second opinion' on the activities of the crew. His primary occupation was handled largely by Laserbeak and Ravage at this time through their reconnaissance; without them as backup he wouldn't be able to perform this additional task at all. It was also an ample opportunity to perform his advisor function since he was with Megatron for most of the cycle. They would find time for discussion while walking between areas, as they were doing now, during which Megatron would ask for his input on various things ranging from the contents of his early cycle briefings to the philosophy behind the Decepticons.

"So, it has come to my attention that the Autobot comms channel is now open for us to interact with more freely," Megatron broke the silence, entering upon another topic. Their pedes moved forward in complement, the two matching one another's pace with little effort. "No doubt in part because of your message, Soundwave. Do you believe making contact with our adversary will be of benefit now?"

"At this point I see little benefit in doing anything else," he replied directly. The focus of his optics remained on the space in front of him, but he was no less attentive for it. "The longer the war persists, the more potential resources for rebuilding are squandered by our fighting."

"But we just discovered a large energon deposit," disputed Megatron; "We could sustain ourselves for much longer, subdue our enemies and formulate a plan to rebuild Cybertron or settle somewhere else all on our own."

Soundwave just shook his head. "Irrelevant to my point. The deposit can theoretically last for over an Earth year, but it can easily be used up much sooner if constantly applied to the war effort. But should be looking beyond material issues by now. Our species has approached extinction; we can no longer afford more deaths over ideological differences. As such, no matter their affiliation we should strive to preserve as many of our number as possible and cooperate. Only then can we Cybertronians experience a plausible revival."

Megatron smiled beside him at his masterful refutation. "Once again, your mind is as sharp as your blade," he commented in praise of his fellow gladiator; "Cybertronians, you said? How long has it been since we called ourselves that? All we've heard for so long now is 'Autobot' and 'Decepticon', as if we'd split into two distinct subspecies when they were only ever political movements."

"Group mentality. Demonisation. Aggression." was Soundwave's only response, though Megatron immediately understood how precisely those terms described the civil war their species was entrenched in.

Another moment of silence passed between them, until they reached the door to their next room, opposite of which was a comms terminal. Anyone could have predicted the idea that came to Megatron upon seeing it after the discussion he just had. "Soundwave, before we enter, might we wish to make contact while the idea is fresh in our minds?" Nothing more than a nod was needed, prompting Megatron to access the terminal and connect with the Autobot base.

***

They had all just come back from another mine excavation. It wasn't much, but the energon would keep them from starving or losing power for another month at least. Everyone's spirits had been raised, however little, by the possibility that their former scout was still alive. Arcee had begun talking again, while even Bulkhead was willing to go on missions. Optimus could only hope that strange message spoke the truth, but how would he be able to approach Bumblebee again? He had been suffering for too long under his command; his concentration on the war effort instead of attending to his troops was now a glaring source of regret for Optimus. He had neglected Bumblebee. But before he dwelled on it too much, he and the other Autobots spotted the base comms terminal beeping as they entered through the ground bridge. 

Ratchet quickly went over to check, then looked back at Optimus with a grim expression. "It's them." were his only words, but the Prime knew what he was referring to.

"Patch them through." Optimus instructed. If they were expected to contact the Nemesis to learn more, then he supposed now was as good a time as any. It was their only potential lead, even if it happened to involve the Decepticons.

The monitor screen connected to whatever terminal the caller was using on the Nemsis, the distinct image of Megatron appearing shortly after. Everyone was surprised; it was rare for the Decepticon leader himself to call them directly. "Optimus," he began in his familiar hoarse tone; "Good to see you and your troops still intact. If there's one thing I can admire about you Autobots it is your resilience."

"Likewise, Megatron," Optimus greeted in brief, wanting to keep to the point since Megatron tended to go off on tangents if allowed to; "I have accepted your call because I wish to enquire about Bumblebee. We believed he was dead in a suicide, but later received a message from someone on your ship saying he is still living."

"Ah, yes. Your former scout. Funny you should be asking about that. Things up here have been much more lively ever since he was brought onboard." Megatron had adopted a jeering voice familiar to Optimus when he spoke, the type which left his intentions unreadable. He was technically making a peace arrangement, to be sure, but that didn't mean he couldn't still have some fun with it.

Optimus's optics widened for a nanoklik before a stern expression was layered over his features. "Where is he, Megatron?" he demanded, clearly serious; "Has he been harmed?"

Megatron recoiled mentally. Okay, perhaps not the best of approaches, as amusing as it often was. He gave the response, unusual to Optimus, of a simple head shake. "He is safe, and beyond you or your subordinate's reach. If you wish to see him you must come to the Nemesis." He made his tone serious to match the Prime, keeping his proposal straightforward. Now it only remained to be seen if they accepted it.

Optimus thought for a moment. Going to the Nemesis directly would be the easiest way to find Bumblebee, but it would also mean heading directly into enemy territory. They would almost certainly be considered prisoners in some fashion. He looked at the other three for consultation, but they seemed just as unsure as he was. He decided to get some clarification. "What are your terms? If we are to board the ship I need your guarantee that my entourage will not be harmed."

"Agreed. Provided of course you do not fire on my troops either."

"Can I trust you to hold true to that?"

Megatron's face looked unimpressed. "If I said yes, I doubt you would believe me anyway. But this is hardly a matter of trust in its present stage, Optimus. We need to reach a suitable peace arrangement before any trust may grow between us," Everyone gave bewildered looks on the other end, leaving him deeply satisfied. "Surprised?" he asked with a wide smirk; "What did you think I was doing when I ceased drawing your attention? You're hardly a suitable threat as you are now, so I don't believe attacking you has a point any longer."

"Negotiating from a position of strength, then," Optimus observed with a frown. He would rather not admit it, but Megatron was right. They often barely had enough resources to keep themselves alive here. A thought then occured to him regarding how easily their comms system had been connected to the Nemesis. "How long have you known the location of our base? Why have you not attacked?" he asked in accusatory prose.

Optimus could just make out a brief smugness on Megatron's face before his serious expression took it over. "It was discovered by Soundwave three months ago. Luckily for you, by that time I developed doubt as to whether this war is worth the effort anymore," He then adopted a more solemn look, perplexing him. "In all honesty, I am getting tired. We have fought for too long, and victory is not worth extinction. Are you aware that there may only be between fifty and one hundred thousand of us left?"

A sudden pain in his chest helped Optimus process the gravity of such a scenario. There were that few Cybertronians now? He was always cautious around Megatron, but he could at least be sure that the Decepticons had greater access to information than they had ever achieved here. He took a moment to himself, facing the ground, then faced the monitor again. "Send us the coordinates for the Nemesis, and keep them updated if it is in flight." The baffled looks from his soldiers were expected. He only hoped he had made the right decision.

"Glad to see you come round, Orion!" Megatron responded gleefully, catching him off guard with his former name; "I expect you all here by at least next early cycle. You will be temporarily detained, then released once we reach a settlement. And of course you may see Bumblebee as well; you won't believe who's been taking care of him! I will await your arrival." With that he ended the call, leaving four bewildered Autobots in his wake.

"I feel sick," Arcee commented once he was gone; "Are we seriously gonna head directly into the Decepticon stronghold? Can we even be sure he'll stick to what he said?" She was agitated, but not without suitable reason.

Optimus explained himself to her concisely. "Normally I would not be so quick to agree, but for once we have evidence to verify Megatron's words. He has not attacked us for three months despite knowing our base's location, nor have the Decepticons' activities directly affected us in that time."

Arcee let out a sigh, then relaxed a bit. "Fine. You'd better know what you're doing, Optimus." she told him before leaving for her quarters.

The distinct powering down of some of the monitors indicated that Ratchet had finished whatever work he was doing. He walked over to Optimus with empty servos, a rare sight. "I should get some rest as well, I believe," the medic suggested, Optimus giving an approving nod; "Do you really think Bumblebee will be there?"

"We can only be certain if we go, my friend." Optimus replied somberly, Ratchet giving a small groan and taking his leave.

"You might want to check on Bulkhead while you're here," he pointed out as he left, Optimus noticing the wrecker sitting in the corner; "Not a psychiatrist, remember?"

As he walked over, it became clearer what Bulkhead was doing. He had his servos on his head and was muttering as if he were praying or pleading, phrases like "Bee, please be safe." barely audible. It was very atypical of him.

"Bulkhead, I know you are worried. We can only hope that Bumblebee is unharmed, but if that is not the case I assure you we will save him." Optimus crouched down beside him, his words rousing Bulkhead and making him turn to look at him.

"Save him? So he can get screwed over by us four again?" he replied, half bitter and half sorrowful.

"No," Optimus replied firmly; "I want to him to receive what he deserves this time. Hopefully the Decepticons can help with that, if Megatron spoke the truth." Bulkhead nodded faintly, allowing him to pull him up off the floor.

"Who do you think's been watching over him?" the wrecker asked as he walked out.

"I would not know, but I hope he has been treated well enough." Optimus answered. Bulkhead was soon out of sight, leaving him the only person in the command centre. He went over outstanding tasks in his mind, finding none, and decided he would be best taking some recharge alongside the rest.

***

"That went better than expected," Megatron said in satisfaction and relief as he turned to face Soundwave; "I thought you would want to join, though."

The dark mech waved his servo in front of him. "It is best that I communicate with them in person. Revealing myself as Bumblebee's caretaker so soon would have caused unrest that could potentially hamper our prospects."

"Thinking ahead, then. You know, the little mech is lucky to be in your custody. Most other people onboard would not be so caring, regrettably including myself."

Soundwave was then reminded of a discussion with Bumblebee. "Speaking of care, is Shockwave available to speak with now?"

"Yes," Megatron responded promptly; "In fact I have spoken to him recently this early cycle. He has finished with all his work and experiments on Cybertron and awaits command to be sent elsewhere. Why, do you need him for something?"

"I would like his assistance in conducting psychiatry work with Bumblebee." came the blunt answer, sending Megatron into a laughing fit.

"Shockwave doing psychiatry? Now that is something I must see!" the silver mech guffawed, raising the optics of some Vehicons walking past; "Probably involving a cortical psychic patch I presume?"

Soundwave just smiled under his visor and allowed him a moment, checking the time. It had just hit mid cycle, so he decided to check on Bumblebee using the surveillance feed in the remote cargo hold. The sight immediately changed his expression from amused to concerned.

"I apologise, Megatron," he spoke, his friend ceasing his laughter at the serious stance he had taken; "But I must head to Bumblebee's location immediately."

"Has a problem occurred?" A quick nod was given, and he considered the amount of work they had left. "Fine." he agreed; "This was our last mandatory stop anyway."

Nodding again, Soundwave turned and quickly walked the way back to the cargo hold, wanting to reach Bumblebee as soon as possible.

*** ***

It became easier to do the more he worked on it. Just take the energon, place it in the correct crates, and watch that he didn't burn himself. Simple. Though it was a bit monotonous; couldn't the miner Vehicons have sorted it while doing their work? He suspected this deposit was probably collected in a rush. It was interesting how much everyone pitched in just to develop their war effort: the miners needed to collect resources, the manufacturers needed to fashion weapons, the officers needed to recruit soldiers to use those weapons-

A sudden painful memory caused his chest to ache. Bumblebee winced and tried to continue, consoling himself that he was almost done. Recruitment. That word held a very negative connotation in his mind, a reminder of his first encounter with this stupid, pointless-

No! This couldn't be happening again now, surely! He tried to practice focusing on his environment again, but it was so hard without Soundwave or the minicons there. He just kept getting pulled back into the memory. He didn't know the name of the town, but it was somewhere on Cybertron's northern hemisphere and he had lived there all his life. Well, until the invasion and conscription at least. He had been raised instead of forged: a longer process since the newborn couldn't be pre-programmed with data and a personality, but it was supposed to produce more adaptive Cybertronians who could respond to their environment better. Not that he ever seemed to though. Not after the town was razed, when he was dragged away somewhere, that red insignia burned and engraved in his memory. He began to tear up and collapsed on top of the sealed crates opposite the window. "Why? Why this again?" he whispered as his sobbing began. He'd been trying so hard to prevent this again, but it just came upon him so easily...

"It's going to be a long journey for you, isn't it?" Bumblebee was gently roused from his shell at the familiar voice and glanced after it, before realising its owner was all around him. He opened his optics to find Soundwave gazing down at him, visor off and showing a faint smile visible despite the dark face. He was in his lap, head against Soundwave's chest, with his pedes dangling and supported only by the larger ones they were brushing against. His frame had the long arms wrapped around it but also something else. The feelers, he realised, as he felt them slither all over him. The thick cables sometimes contracted and squeezed gently, releasing approving sighs from him. He looked around them both again, finally concluding that Soundwave was sitting on one of the secure crates with him in his hold.

"This... feels a bit like when we first met." Bumblebee murmured, face wet though he was no longer crying.

"Is there anything different about it?" Soundwave enquired.

"It's better... feels more familiar." Bumblebee looked up to face Soundwave, at last able to manage a smile of his own. They remained like that for a few more moments until Soundwave released him, then he moved over to sit beside him on the crate.

"I got caught up thinking about my past," Bumblebee spoke after a brief silence, already aware of why Soundwave had come. "It was the memory of when I was made an Autobot. I didn't want to be one, but they took a lot of us anyway."

"You were conscripted?" asked Soundwave in concern and with a hint of horror. The nod he received gave him pause. So Bee was an unwilling recruit. That explained quite a few things. "That is a rare occurrence with forged mechs. Were you raised instead?"

"Yes. I don't know who my carriers were; I might have had multiple in that place. They all likely died in the invasion though," Bumblebee's optics darkened as he recalled. "Afterwards I woke up with an insignia branded on me and weapons built into my frame. I was expected to just go outside and shoot people, though I could never get used to it. There was some brief training, and I was enlisted as a scout, but that was about it. I never understood it." A mortifying realisation then came to Bumblebee and he clung tightly to Soundwave's frame, tearing up again.

"Bumblebee?"

"I'm sorry!" he sobbed, voice frantic and self-deprecating; "I'm sorry I killed your soldiers and comrades! I never wanted to hurt anyone and I did and I hate that I did and-" he was cut off by a sudden tight feeling around him. There was a warmth near his audial as the tightness increased.

"Shhh, I forgive you. It's okay, I'm not angered." came a voice from the warmth, which he recognised as Soundwave's mouth. The voice was shaky, as if Soundwave might become upset himself. He guessed that they were cuddling again and relaxed, the two of them keeping that position opposite the window until they both calmed down.

"You can just... forgive me like that?" he wondered as they separated again.

"Everyone is a murderer of some form of life," the larger replied; "War just makes us murderers of each other. I have no right or reason to condemn you when I share the same sin."

Bumblebee then gazed out of the window into space. "If only more of us thought like that."

Soundwave followed his action. "I keep a file of casualties, for both factions where possible. Your body count is among the smallest I have on record."

"You keep records of deaths?" Bumblebee asked, intrigued.

"A reminder of our collective sin as a species," he answered. He was speaking with somewhat different language than he usually did. "It is hardly surprising if one gives thought to it: a war is not possible unless the leaders of a group demonise another group to give their armies reason to fight them. The intention is to create a separation between them and you, to make the enemy less than a person so that you will have no qualms killing them."

Bumblebee shot a horrified expression in his direction. "But why? Why would there be any need to separate us?"

"There isn't, but that is usually never realised at the time. It is difficult for people to see their own faults, but much easier to see the faults in others. They hold up their views as 'just' while condemning differing viewpoints as 'evil', not realising that they might be fundamentally similar. We are also expected to just keep shooting in pursuit of the cause and not stop to think about it. If we do, we might find out that our opponents are not so evil at all, which prevents the higher authorities in our own group from achieving their goals. That is perceived as detrimental to them unless they too can be persuaded. Make no mistake; I too am guilty of having thought in such ways at one time." He stopped for a moment to give Bee time to process his words.

"Then, shouldn't we be trying to unify ourselves instead of maintaining group mentalities with no real basis?" This conversation was getting frightening and interesting at the same time.

"Yes, but it requires targeting the right people," Soundwave replied; "Officers and leaders are the best choices, since the infantry tends to be more conditioned. You see, soldiers are intended to be living weapons. Their purpose is to attack the enemy, and nothing else. The Vehicons were an attempt to subvert that maxim, but unfortunately it turned out similar anyway. I could tell you more about that later if you wish."

Bumblebee began to feel contemplative. "Living weapons. Some of the Autobot soldiers acted that way, but I could never accept that behaviour. I just couldn't see any reason to it. Do you think it has anything to do with my development?"

Soundwave's nod was a more direct answer than he expected. "Forged Cybertronians are easier to condition than the raised types, since they effectively come pre-packaged and built for a purpose. The raised by contrast learn through experience from the beginning, which while making them more versatile also leaves them less susceptible to suggestion."

"Which type are you?"

"Forged, as all in the mining caste were," Soundwave suddenly clenched his servos and looked down. "This was never meant to happen. Our movement was based around liberating Cybertron from that system which manipulated the birthing methods so perniciously. Instead our species is nearing extinction all because of a few disagreements over the means!"

The sudden flare of emotion caught Bumblebee off guard, rare as it was for Soundwave to show. He could tell he was in pain, so he clasped two of their servos together. "Hey, don't start acting like me now." he spoke softly, happy to see Soundwave smile at him and become calmer.

"Thank you. This is a topic which claws at my spark as well." They each took a moment to relax and stare out of the window once more, admiring the starry view.

"Would I be allowed to learn some of your past now I've shared more of mine?" Bumblebee edged a bit closer as he asked, starting to feel cold.

A quick nod was his response, followed by speech. "But not here. I much prefer to discuss my past when Laserbeak and Ravage are present," Bumblebee was startled and blushed when he suddenly pressed into him, head looming inches above his own. "Why didn't you say so if you were cold?" Soundwave murmured as he wrapped his arms around his back.

"We were busy talking... " Bumblebee answered sheepishly, cheekplates growing rosy and blushing harder when Soundwave smiled and tightened his grip.

"I have a way to help with that if you wish. You asked me to do it once before." Bumblebee realised quickly what he meant, consenting by wrapping his arms around his neck. Soundwave closed the distance and his mouth was captured in a much deeper and longer kiss than the last time. He embraced the moment and gave quiet moans as he let Soundwave explore his mouth, making sure to sample the spymaster's as well when the opportunity came. Sometimes their glossas would make contact and engage in a playful wrestle, in which Soundwave won all matches for this kiss at least. After continuing for what was probably one or two kliks they separated. He certainly felt warmer after that, though Soundwave held on to him with mischievous intent in his optics. "Hmm, adequate enough. But I think I should be more thorough." He hadn't noticed Soundwave wrap his feelers around him during the kiss, and before he could ask what he meant he was lifted into the air at a short length away from Soundwave as he stood up.

"What? What are you doing?" he asked nervously.

"Something that will guarantee you get warm." came the simple reply as the thick and wide cables enveloped him from neck to ankle joints, holding him in place snugly like a cocoon.

"Th-This is embarrassing!" Bumblebee cried out with a mad blush, though he had to admit it was comfortable. He felt like a cobra or Insecticon's prey like this. Before he could speak again he was cut off by a squeeze all over him, gasping at the relaxing sensation.

"Hence why it will be effective," Soundwave replied nonchalantly as he began; "Don't worry about privacy. The camera is deactivated." The feelers then gave their full attention to their captive, squeezing and massaging him in various ways. They would contract either in specific areas or around his entire frame, all the while slithering across to give each squeeze a different feel.

Bee could only continue to gasp and moan at the sensations, resolving to thank Soundwave later somehow. Compared to before, the feelers still squeezed gently but with much more pressure, taking a more seductive quality in their actions. Two of the feeler tips even seemed content to stroke his feet, making him release whimpering giggles as his massage became a little tickly. He thought Soundwave would look smug, Holding him at the height of his head above the ground helplessly, but he seemed to be pondering something instead.

"What is it you enjoy about losing control like this?" he asked, slowing down so Bumblebee could answer.

"I'm not sure. It just feels good to give it all to someone I trust, like I can be sure they won't hurt me no matter how helpless I am," Soundwave seemed satisfied with that answer, gently releasing Bumblebee and setting him on the ground. His head now reached up to his abdomen as usual, Soundwave stroking it in response to Bumblebee's satisfied beaming. "Thanks for coming to help me." he murmured.

"Of course," Soundwave responded. He checked the time on his chronometer, cross-referencing it with the nearest computer terminal to be sure. "I believe we should head back to our quarters now. You have done good work today."

"Good work? What do you-" he stopped abruptly when Soundwave pointed to the crates, indicating Bumblebee had just managed to finish before he broke down. He replaced talking with a smile after seeing that.

"Do you still want to do this job?" Soundwave asked, concerned in case something like this happened again. The nod he received was sincere, so he left it at that. They walked to the door and prepared to leave the cargo hold. Before doing so Soundwave spoke one more time. "You might wish to hear some good news that recently came to my knowledge."

"What news?" Bee enquired curiously.

"Shockwave is available. He can be called to the ship if you desire it."

His optics widened sharply as he recalled their talk about him a while ago. "Oh, that's right. Shockwave... I almost forgot... "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, all that certainly took a while. It only covered half of the cycle too. This chapter is the introduction to some of the story's more technical aspects. Expect to encounter further mention of military psychology, the differences between raised and forged Cybertronians etc.
> 
> As fun as this was, I wouldn't think it ideal to write this much for a single chapter again. Knowing me though I'll get carried away regardless. I hope it's enjoyable for people to read anyway. I'm not entirely sure how I'd like chapter 6 to work out, but I have some ideas. This story is going to have at least 12 chapters, so once chapter 6 is done I'll be marking that as the completion of part 1.
> 
> Thank you for reading as always!
> 
> Special thanks to 12drakon for providing feedback which went into the development of this chapter.


	6. 家族 (Family)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew, this one took a while. It went through some revisions and edits before I was ready to post. Carrying on from chapter five seemed daunting, but think I've managed well enough. It's roughly just as long too: so much for my previous caution in the last end notes then. I suppose the content just determines the length, and this chapter had a lot of things it needed to follow up on from the previous one. As per usual, I hope you find it enjoyable.
> 
> Kanji 家族 (かぞく-Kazoku) in title means Family.

They were making their way back via a different route. It was shorter and the corridors were almost vacant of Vehicons or other people, much to Bumblebee's satisfaction. This was probably one of the other routes Soundwave had mentioned before. As they walked, he spent much of the time pondering over Shockwave. He had once read an Autobot database on prominent Decepticons, and could remember a bit of Shockwave's entry: apparently he was a cold and emotionless scientist, caring about nothing other than his work and not sparing a thought for morality and ethics. From what he'd seen of the Decepticons so far though, he deemed it likely that the database was biased. Demonisation, as he and Soundwave discussed earlier. He still wasn't sure about the idea of going through therapy with someone he didn't know, though Soundwave had described Shockwave as harmless provided one kept logical around him. He decided to just ask for clarification later.

"Bumblebee: thinking about Shockwave?" his taller partner asked beside him. He still hadn't completely gotten over the monotone in public thing, but it didn't surprise him now.

"Yes. You sure you don't read my mind?" he replied with a grin. Soundwave just rubbed his shoulder with a servo as they walked.

In all, it had taken about seven kliks for them to reach the door to their quarters. Their quarters, Bumblebee repeated in his mind with intrigue. Had he really become so comfortable here? He'd only interacted with Soundwave and his minicons for a few cycles since his suicide attempt, yet he'd grown incredibly trustful and admiring of them in that short time. Maybe it was just a natural reaction, considering they were the only people to have ever directly helped him with his troubles. Soundwave entered the access code and stepped into the room in front of him, the two meeting optics with Laserbeak and Ravage sitting expectantly on the berth. Seeing Soundwave stop by the cabinet and open it, Bumblebee guessed he should interact with the minicons and walked over to them.

No sooner had Bee sat down than when Ravage darted into his lap and began nuzzling his abdomen. "You had us both scared," he purred with his forehead touching; "I felt like running over to you alongside Soundwave." The yellow mech just stared at his legs feeling unsure what to do. More emotional than he had let on, Ravage became jumpy at the lack of response and rubbed Bee's ribs with a paw and his tail, smiling in triumph at the near immediate yelp. "Rub my back or something, will ya?" he spoke up in a cutely demanding tone; "I want to feel that you're okay, not just see or hear." Bumblebee gave a nervous smile, quickly stroking Ravage's back to calm him down.

"Oh, joy. He's going to start again," came a sarcastic chirp from Laserbeak as he perched on Bumblebee's shoulder; "But his thoughts are where they should be. I'm relieved to see you okay now." His next action was to press his fanged beak to Bee's cheek and kiss it, eliciting a flustered blush from him. "What?" the bird chuckled lightly; "Kissing can also be a form of greeting or address in some cultures."

"O-okay," Bumblebee replied steadily, glancing over at Soundwave who seemed to be inspecting items in the cabinet; "Um, you probably already know, but I wanted to talk about something with you two and Soundwave-"

He was cut off from Laserbeak's wing covering his mouth. "Not just yet," he whispered while looking down at Ravage, who was shifting and nuzzling more roughly as Bumblebee stroked him. Glancing back up, he gave Bee a mischievously phrased "Brace yourself." before leaving his shoulder, gliding down to sit on the pillow and observe.

Before he could ask what Laserbeak meant, Ravage jumped up to his face, bringing him down and  
gently pinning him to the berth. "I can't hold it anymore!" he whined excitedly; "I want to just keep you here with me now that you're back! That cute face of yours shouldn't have tears covering it!" He was mainly hugging, but he still couldn't pass up the chance to run his tail over Bee's abdomen. After a moment he decided to nibble at his neck too, wanting to communicate to the vulnerable mech how deeply he cared.

If he had tried to speak it would have been waylaid by his own giggling. Ravage's actions were more vigorous than before, but Bumblebee didn't mind, accepting that the minicon was emotional and allowing him to show affection. He was surprisingly strong, holding him down firmly despite his smaller size. It would have taken a painful amount of effort to push him off. As he relaxed into the moment, he began to notice details that didn't occur to him previously. Ravage reminded him of those Earthen black jaguars in some respects: his frame was entirely jet coloured minus some violet biolights covering him and silvery outlines at the tips of his limbs. His paws were oddly blunt compared to the overall sleek and sharp design, though they had ports on them for what he guessed were retractable claws. The tail was long but thin (and was utter murder on his ribs), easily blending into the background unless clearly displayed. Quite an organic and flexible frame, which likely helped with his work.

Ravage noticed Bumblebee staring, slowly stopping and standing on his four pedes to gaze down at him. "Checking me out, huh?" he teased, the flustered face below him giving all the answer he needed; "I don't mind. You're pretty handsome yourself. It's good meditation practice too."

He was about to react in embarrassment again, but the mention of meditation caught Bumblebee's attention. "What do you mean?" he asked, sitting up as much as he could with Ravage on top of him.

"Laserbeak and I practice too, you know. It isn't obvious because of how lively it looks, but just about anything can be a focusing tool if you adapt it to that purpose." Ravage left Bumblebee's torso to sit by his side, allowing him to sit up fully, then gestured for his counterpart to come over to them.

Laserbeak flew over take his familiar position on Bee's shoulder again, elaborating on the topic now in discussion. "When we spend time in physical contact, most other things fade out of our view. We can concentrate on one another without distractions and fully appreciate the moment," He decided to touch him in case it helped him understand better, scratching Bumblebee's neck with one wing and stroking his head with the other. "When I tickle or otherwise play with Ravage for example, we can often continue as long as we like thanks to how focused we are on each other. Sir describes it as a visualisation exercise."

It made sense to Bumblebee quickly; quite difficult for your mind to wander when one or more people are paying so much attention to you. Maybe it would be good to try out several methods and see what worked best for him. "Thanks, you two," he spoke when his pondering finished; "Soundwave had calmed me down before, but I'm glad to have you to cheer me up and teach me as well."

Ravage leaped in between his legs again, curling up and purring contently, while Laserbeak wrapped both of his large wings around Bumblebee's head completely. "No problem," he soothed; "We're each happy to share our methods with you whenever you like. Heh, which reminds me, I'll have to try working on this sensitive frame of yours myself at some point."

The devious turn of phrase and lilting of Laserbeak's Vehicon-like optical slit sent a shiver down Bee's spinal cord; he was already familiar with how easily the bird's talons could immobilise Ravage, so he had a lot to be fearful and excited about. As Laserbeak's wings left his head a shadow loomed over the three of them, each gazing up to see Soundwave standing opposite with an energon vial in his servo. The cabinet was closed, so Bumblebee deduced that he had finished inspecting it.

"That all seemed rather enjoyable for you," the tall mech commented to Bumblebee as he sat down and retracted his visor; "As can only be expected with these two as your company. No matter how adept I become at solving problems myself, I haven't stopped benefiting from interacting with my symbionts." Soundwave then offered the vial he was holding to Bumblebee, who accepted. He let him take a sip from it before addressing a new topic. "Now then, I believe you wanted to learn some of my background?"

Bumblebee nodded eagerly, remembering his request from before. Ravage and Laserbeak promptly left him and went to sit in Soundwave's lap. "Can't do that without us, then," Ravage said smiling; "We're so connected that an explanation from just one of us would leave things incomplete, or at least make it feel hollow."

"That counts only for when the kitten and I enter the story, of course." Laserbeak clarified.

Soundwave glanced up at the ceiling briefly before he began. "I suspect it is getting late now, so I will attempt to keep it concise. I was forged to be a miner in the city of Kaon, twice in fact, since my original frame was deemed inadequate for the job. My designation back then was R-49."

"You were forged twice?" wondered Bumblebee in confusion; "What was wrong with your original frame?"

"Nothing significant; the specifications merely didn't fit my caste. Under the caste system your frame and your potential were disregarded since castes were assigned before birth. If someone deviated from their caste in any way they would be 'corrected', or otherwise smelted and replaced. Many of us found it nonsensical. Moving on, I initially spent my life in drudgery like my fellow workers, my new, bulkier and 'caste appropriate' frame a source of resentment. Conditions were poor and deaths common, with no room to have many conversations or learn about the world outside of the gladiator games."

Finished drinking from the energon vial, Bumblebee gave it back to Soundwave, who placed it in his subspace to deal with later. "The world you're describing doesn't seem any better from my own experience," he observed; "Were these 'gladiator games' a way to cope for the people there?"

Laserbeak answered him with a nod. "They were duels between two combatants in front of crowds. Some were death matches, but the ones in Kaon were only knockout tournaments. This was before Ravage and I existed, but sir told us a lot about them in our early lives at the compound."

"Compound?"

"A later period," Soundwave clarified; "As for the fighting, I was surprisingly skilled at it despite lacking fondness for the bloodsport. My designation gained large renown in Kaon alongside another: D-16. There was large uproar and demand for us to fight, resulting in a match between us in Kaon's largest pit. It was the first time either of us experienced a real challenge, the match ending in stalemate. D-16 was a charismatic person, and the passion of the match compelled him to give a speech where he denounced our numerical designations and encouraged all miners to assume proper names, leading the charge by declaring himself 'Megatronus'. Like many others, I was inspired and changed my name from R-49 to 'Soundwave' in reference to my original frame."

"Scar-face was good at public speaking from the start," Ravage continued; "He convinced Soundwave to tour other pits with him, where they would engage in more demonstrative matches and speeches. The speeches quickly evolved in their content to calling for a full dismantling of the caste system, an ideal that struck a cord with many dissatisfied people."

"Good recall, Ravage," Soundwave praised as he stroked the minicon; "The movement picked up large amounts of followers, even from outside Kaon. The desperate death battles in Slaughter City ceased as the movement spread there, an event which attracted large attention to us. Once individuals from higher castes gave their support, such as Starscream, Shockwave and Orion Pax, the movement became too prolific for the councils to ignore. Putting it down through force would have caused riots, so we received an offer to make us an official political movement. We quickly made use of the opportunity, naming ourselves 'Decepticons' to mark the occasion. Megatronus even commemorated it on a personal level by restyling himself as 'Megatron'. We chose Iacon as the place from which to give our terms to Cybertron's united governments, receiving accommodation in apartment towers near the council building and 30 cycles to prepare ourselves. It became popularly known as the 'Decepticon Compound' during that time."

"Oh, so that's what Laserbeak was referring to," Bumblebee realised; "So, what was life in the compound like?"

"My time there included some of my happiest moments," Soundwave answered; "I spent much time reading and learning, making up for lost time. It was there that I also met Shockwave of the science caste, who offered to reformat my frame so it better resembled its original state. It is the same frame I have now, and is capable of symbiont production. Shockwave assisted in my first attempt at making one during the third cycle, the result being Laserbeak." He stroked the head of the referenced minicon before continuing. "I also met Starscream and Orion Pax there, whom Megatron was quite fond of. Orion suggested I create another minicon to give Laserbeak company, so on the night of the tenth cycle I created-"

"Me! Ravage!" the feline cried joyfully as he nuzzled Laserbeak; "I bet your life got more exciting after that, birdie."

"In more ways than you can imagine, kitten." Laserbeak replied affectionately.

Soundwave allowed himself a moment to smile before speaking again. "I continued getting acquainted with Shockwave as the cycles passed. Several notable events occured as well, such as Orion's promotion to Optimus Prime at the Iacon public's demand."

"Optimus was one of you?" Bumblebee was bewildered. He'd never been told this by any of the Autobots.

"Yes. He was originally an archivist who documented and promoted our campaign, making him something of an underground celebrity in Iacon. I am not sure we would have been as successful without his input," Soundwave released a pained sigh between sentences. "Everything seemed to be going well; by the twentieth cycle we were all well acquainted and on good terms. Shockwave and I even became intimate in our relationship, though his understanding of intimacy is rather 'unique'."

The last part left Bumblebee intrigued, though he wasn't entirely sure why. "Um, can I ask about that later?"

Soundwave hid his amusement at the meek phrasing and simply nodded, but his face quickly turned more solemn. "After the twenty-fifth cycle things collapsed. Megatron and Optimus were arguing over what to say to the council. Optimus championed slower changes to the system with fewer side effects, while Megatron wanted to implement reforms swiftly to prevent a resurgence from occurring. Neither was able to see the merits of the other's ideas and cooperate. I wanted to intervene, but I refrained because I lacked confidence on the topic and thought I would just cause more arguments. One of my worst mistakes. Optimus soon came to believe that Megatron's hardline approach would lead to another form of dictatorship. Megatron accused him of the same, saying that his status as a Prime had gone to his head and that he would prolong the people's suffering with his slow approach. Optimus split off from the rest of the movement, forming the Autobots, and both factions were called to the council hearing. The bitter arguments ensured no progress was made. The council allowed one more cycle for a course of action to be decided, but reports of ministers and faction members being assassinated started circulating Iacon at that time. Tensions rose to their highest, both sides accusing one another and taking arms to stop the 'oppressors'. The rest is blood soaked history."

Head facing down, Bumblebee's face took a mournful expression. "Why?" he questioned with sorrow-induced calmness; "Why does a war have to start because of that?"

"I still ask that question myself. People can come to blows over the mildest of things, but you couldn't hope to understand the extent of such stupidity without witnessing it yourself. Even then it seems bewildering. I stayed with Megatron out of loyalty to a friend. As the war progressed, I like so many others was corrupted and lost sight of our original aims for a time. I regained my awareness earlier than most after witnessing several traumatic events. I hesitate to consider myself 'lucky', but I wouldn't hold the resolve I do now otherwise."

"One of those events was the killing of Rumble and Frenzy." Laserbeak commented in a hollow tone.

"But let's not go there right now," Ravage quickly jumped in for his partner's sake; "You don't look ready to discuss that yet." Laserbeak nodded and allowed the topic to change.

Soundwave took point and remembered a good event from before. "On a brighter note, I should tell you that the Autobots have agreed to come onboard the Nemesis for a peace settlement next cycle."

Bumblebee's face lit up. "Really? T-thank you!" He gave Soundwave a quick hug, frame giddy and fidgety when he pulled away as other three smiled at his euphoria.

"We may be required to get involved in the proceedings," Soundwave explained; "There will be disruptions to schedule, so don't expect to be doing your job."

He nodded in consideration. "Okay. I hope things turn out better for everyone this time, and I'm sorry I can't talk about my own past as much. It's just so difficult to remember some parts of it."

"That's fine," Laserbeak assured; "We'd be excited to hear anything you want to share. I've always wondered how a raised mech sees things."

"But we'll need to leave all that for later," Soundwave reminded them all; "For now, let us get some rest."

"Alright, but can we recharge with you two this time?" asked Ravage meekly; "I like us all to be together after reminiscing." Soundwave turned to Bee for his approval, following his response when he nodded, and Ravage gave a light growl in appreciation as he pounced on his creator.

"R-Ravage!" Laserbeak cried in astonishment, but calmed upon seeing Soundwave chuckling lightly and enjoying it.

Bumblebee watched Ravage with a smile until he stopped, moving to the edge of the berth and curling up there. Laserbeak followed suit, the minicons waving before preparing for recharge beside one another. "Thanks again," Bumblebee whispered as Soundwave waved the lights off; "I hope things go well with the others once they arrive. They might be troubled by some of the things we've arranged."

"I wouldn't worry too much over it," Soundwave consoled as they lay down; "The Autobots will most likely want to be sure you are safe more than anything else." He pulled the covers over them and snuggled up to him. "Also, have you made your decision on meeting Shockwave yet?"

Bumblebee released quiet purrs from the closeness of their frames. "Mmh, I think I'd like to meet him. I'm more confident about it now I've learned you had a past with him." Soundwave nodded to acknowledge his decision, then pulled him closer and began massaging his small door wings. He let out breathy, silent moans from the sensation, the warmth produced lulling him to recharge in just a few kliks...

..."Mm, aaah please," Bumblebee mumbled in his recharge, shifting a little; "Mmm Please...keep going...I-ah!" He woke abruptly from the intensity of the dream's last part. Looking around the room once, he noticed the lights were on again, but dimmer, indicating the time had hit early solar macrons by now. Bumblebee was about to sit up, until he noticed with muffled shock that his spike was jutting out for the world to see. He'd never seen it quite so thick without stimulation before; did he really get so aroused just from dreaming? He glanced over at Soundwave to check if he was still recharging, barely stopping a gasp when he saw another spike in view. It must have been about twice the size of his own, rising up from the mech's pelvic plating in full view and nearly touching his. Bumblebee became incredibly flustered at the twitches his spike gave when he looked at Soundwave's, moving away and scrambling off the berth with a quiet squeak. Good thing their arms had dropped off each other while in recharge. Bewildered and unsure what to do, Bumblebee slowly walked into the cleaning chamber and closed the door behind him, using the alone time to make sense of what was happening. This wasn't unexpected, right? Soundwave had told him his own spike had been getting aroused during that cycle. Still, seeing a spike other than his own was completely new to him; he felt embarrassed even though Soundwave wasn't awake. And that reaction his frame was having from seeing it...

Bumblebee slumped down against one of the cleaning chamber walls, holding his servos out in front of him. Were he and Soundwave that attracted to each other? He knew that he liked the spymaster, and that Soundwave seemed to return the affection, but he'd never considered crossing the line completely until now. It all seemed a bit fast considering their short time together. Maybe he'd gotten to this point so quickly because of how much effort Soundwave made to take care of him? He was unused to being given affection after all, let alone what he received here. Bumblebee let his arms fall back and stared at his spike, still pressurised. He stayed in that position for half a micron, then gripped the spike with a servo. It wouldn't hurt to deal with it now, right? He looked to make sure the door was closed properly, then began pumping.

Back in the main room, Soundwave formed a faint smile as he lay on the berth. Bumblebee had certainly tried hard to not wake anyone up, and to the mech's credit the minicons were still asleep, but his own senses were too sharp to prevent him from noticing most things. If the soft moans from the cleaning chamber were any indication, Bumblebee had gained the confidence to deal with issues of arousal on his own. A good sign. As for him, he could wait: the arousal wasn't too high to ignore, and he could just deal with it next cycle if it reached that point. Alternatively, he could discuss the topic with Bumblebee so they could work through it together. The peace meeting took priority of course, but it seemed they were reaching a point where they needed to work out what kind of relationship they wanted. He would be more than willing to get intimate with him, cute as he was, but only if Bumblebee wanted it as well. His recovery came first, so if he was uncomfortable with deepening their relationship then he would leave the matter be. Allowing Bumblebee his moment, Soundwave began a body scan meditation on the berth, continuing until Bumblebee returned. No trace of his wakefulness was apparent to Bumblebee, who snuggled against him and entered recharge again quickly. Soundwave decided to get some extra rest as well, smiling contently as the moments passed.

***

The roof of the Nemesis was large, enough to hold around two thirds of the crew if one packed them all tightly. As such, the accompaniment of Starscream, Knock Out and 20 Vehicons seemed rather small in Megatron's view. The space directly ahead of him was empty, to make room for an expected ground bridge. He glanced up, seeing the clouds close above illuminated by the solar system's star. Quite a nice early cycle for a meeting between adversaries. Or perhaps 'morning', as some of the natives called it? No matter. If all went well they probably wouldn't be staying here much longer anyway. He continued to wait patiently, running a system diagnostic to pass the time, until a familiar green portal opened a few metres away. Equally familiar were the four figures who stepped out, arriving just within their agreed schedule.

"My salutations, Megatron," greeted Optimus as he strode away from the closing portal; "We have refrained from an aggressive stance, as per our agreement, so I expect reciprocity on your end. I suspect everyone here is still armed, after all."

"But of course, Optimus," Megatron responded in the confident tone Optimus was well acquainted with; "We wouldn't want our hopes dashed in the first few nanons. Everyone, lock your weapon systems." 22 audible clicks behind him signalled that his command had been followed. He did the same, listening to his arm cannon power down as the manual lock engaged, while to his satisfaction the four Autobots locked their weapons in turn.

Optimus walked ahead of the other Autobots until he and Megatron stood close opposite one another. "I apologise for almost straining our schedule; preparations took longer than expected."

The ex-gladiator just smiled and waved his servo, a gesture he knew to mean 'Don't worry about it' or something similar. Starscream then came forward from Megatron's right, expression seemingly tired and holding four bands of some sort.

"These are identity markers," Starscream explained in a bored tone; "Please wear them at all times so people can distinguish you from the crew or whatever."

Taking the bands in his own servo, Optimus turned around and gestured for Arcee, Bulkhead and Ratchet to come closer. They were understandably bemused upon seeing what Optimus was holding.

"Run a scan on them if you are uncertain." suggested Megatron behind them, Ratchet taking point and wearing one to study it.

"These bands may as well be accessories," the medic concluded after analysing their properties; "My scans indicate no ill effects being produced from wearing this." He turned his face to Megatron, giving a half-glare. "I'm astonished, quite frankly."

"Antagonising you would only damage my efforts here," came the oddly blunt response. Megatron watched the Autobots place the bands on now that their sense of danger was diminished, then turned around. "Let us proceed inside," he told everyone present, heading to the large entrance in front of him with the officers by his sides. The Autobots followed close behind, flanked on either side by the Vehicons. Once they reached the doors to the interior, Megatron ordered the Vehicons to go in first and disperse to await further command. "We have guests," he reiterated on the loudspeaker to the rest of the ship before entering; "Lock your weapon systems to be accommodating."

With less people following him now, Megatron took the Autobots on a route leading to an unoccupied room near his own quarters. "What will happen if this settlement is unsuccessful?" Optimus asked behind him, a question he had wondered over last night.

"Then I will allow you all to leave freely, though we will resume our status as enemies," He briefly checked for shorter routes on a touchscreen, finding one and going down the first hallway on it, before continuing. "Considering the circumstances we are each under though, I am confident a positive outcome will be reached."

"Perhaps..." Optimus mused. If the situation of their species was as dire as Megatron said, making peace would be a logical necessity. He knew firsthand how irrationally people who held grudges could act though, both from his own troops and elsewhere. Arcee was a clear example; hopefully she could keep herself calm throughout this settlement. She would try of course, since she thankfully wasn't fond of her vengeful side.

Continuing on the route, Megatron arrived at the soon-to-be guest room earlier than previously expected. "This will serve as your accommodation during your stay," he informed the Autobots; "It is a larger suite than most, so it should account for all four of you."

"The door will seal behind us, I presume?" Optimus queried with expectant phrasing. He wasn't disappointed when Megatron nodded; they were still technically enemies, so it only made sense to restrict their movements until the settlement concluded.

"I made sure to sterilise everything before you came, floors and all," Knock Out chimed in pridefully; "Feel free to use the buffing tools I left inside. Your frames could do with a little sprucing up."

Starscream was unamused. "Yes, Knock Out, we all appreciate your vital contribution. Now don't you have some work to do?" He spoke his words sarcastically but still sounded bored. Unperturbed, the red medic left, muttering something about jet washing as he disappeared down the corridor.

"Can we hurry?" Arcee rasped impatiently; "The sooner this is over with, the better."

Megatron unlocked the door, revealing to the Autobots a large room with a table for five at the centre. There was an embedded Hologram projector in the table, along with an energon dispenser and network terminal in separate corners. Gaps in the walls gave away the presence of five foldable berths, though the Autobots likely wouldn't be staying long enough to make use of them. Optimus entered first, inspecting the room and giving an all clear. The other three entered one by one, Ratchet keeping his focus in front of him while Arcee gave steely looks to the Decepticons behind her. Bulkhead went last, turning around just before he took his last step in. "We can see Bumblebee after this, right?" he asked sternly. The Decepticon commander only nodded, but it was noticeably sincere. Satisfied for now, Bulkhead took his last step and entered the suite, the door closing and locking the Autobots inside.

"You are acting differently than I believed you would," Megatron grumbled to Starscream upon noticing his demeanour; "Is something bothering you?"

"There are matters I am eager to discuss with the seekers, so everything else is a nuisance to me at present." The former naval commander had perked up slightly, as was typical when he received the chance to talk about his people.

"Tribal issues, then?" wondered Megatron with a smirk.

"I wish you would refrain from using that phrase so often. But anyway, my people are getting excitable over the potential of this settlement, even more so than when Soundwave brought that ex-scout onboard as his pet. I need to discuss courses of action with them depending on its outcome."

"Oh? I wasn't expecting you would take to peace making with so much enthusiasm."

"Keep your praise. I still have no love for the Autobots," Starscream downplayed; "But the seekers have long awaited a chance to stop fighting. My duty as their leader is to seize the opportunity now presented. The tribe comes first, as has always been our maxim."

"The flying nomads who shunned caste and lived on their own terms," Megatron reminisced; "And it's all too appropriate that you, a former military caste member, have led them all this time. Though with your temperament I'd dread to think how you would act without such responsibility."

Starscream smirked, turning to walk down the corridor. "In another universe, we're probably at each other's throats." he speculated in amusement as he left.

Now alone, Megatron went over the rest of his plans for the cycle. Remembering he was to meet Soundwave and Bumblebee on the bridge, he set off there, sending a message to Optimus that he would be back in half a macron.

*** ***

The bridge was a hectic place, bustling with Vehicons tapping away at terminals and moving around constantly. Certainly not somewhere Bumblebee felt comfortable, but he trusted he could handle it with Soundwave there to help him. He stood at the corner of Soundwave's workstation near the bridge entrance, watching the communications chief in action as he sorted through camera feeds and network files at blinding speed. Two of his feelers were plugged into ports under the side terminals for further efficiency. All in all, Soundwave looked a little...charming? He allowed himself a brief smile at the description.

"Bumblebee: nervous?" Soundwave asked. The monotone didn't make him flinch; it was losing its surprise factor now, not that either of them minded.

"A bit, but I should be fine," he reassured; "I'm more concerned over the settlement. Have they arrived yet?"

Soundwave displayed the camera feed for the guest suite on a side terminal, showing the four Autobots conversing around the table. Bumblebee fixed his optics on it joyfully, relieved to see them all safe. "They're all okay then...thanks, I wasn't expecting you to show a visual while working."

"Multi-tasking: common in work. Little effort required with practice." The visual was left in the monitor's corner, in case Bumblebee wanted to look longer.

"Right. I should've known you'd be used to such requests. Will Laserbeak and Ravage be coming to see as well?"

"Symbionts: cleaning quarters. Will arrive here once finished."

From what Bumblebee understood of their behaviour, it was only natural that the minicons would be interested in the settlement, if only to watch his reunion with his former comrades. How were they going to react to his lacking an insignia now? He shook his head and dismissed it for the moment. One thing at a time, as Soundwave instructed him before they left their quarters. That way he wouldn't undergo so much stress.

Though remaining focused on the monitors, Soundwave could still notice Bumblebee staring by his side at the work he was doing. "Interested?" he asked, implicitly offering to brief the yellow mech on some bits. Receiving a nod, he displayed two files he just finished on the main terminal. "General work: split into three areas. One: monitoring ship activity and people through cameras, motion detectors or other means. Two: maintaining the network and files stored on it. Three: managing the communications array. Soundwave: can perform each task manually or wirelessly, though use of terminals is preferred."

"Is that because you can connect your cables to them?"

Soundwave nodded. "Feelers: allow faster processing. Direct interface: increases performance greatly." He stopped his typing and unplugged, seemingly finished, then brought Bumblebee's attention to a text file written in a peculiar language.

"I've never seen symbols like that before. Is this an old writing system?" He was no linguist, but he could tell what he was seeing wasn't Basic script.

The words appeared on his visor rather than being spoken, startling Bumblebee briefly.

It was hardly possible to hide his surprise, though he made sure to whisper. "You made up your own language just to further protect your files? Clever." This level of dedication must be why Megatron valued him so highly.

He guessed Soundwave was using text to keep this part of their talk private, so he refrained from speaking again and expressed his interest with a nod. 

Quickly closing the file and logging off, Soundwave stepped away from the terminal and looked over at the bridge doors. "Megatron: should arrive now. Expect racket." His small partner gave a mild snicker at his statement just before the doors opened, the familiar silver mech striding through along with the minicons. They must have met on their way here.

"So, I guess Optimus will be wanting you to ensure everyone gets a fair deal. Do you think he'll demand giving rights to nanites?" Laserbeak joked as they entered.

"Ha! He'll probably want to guarantee the liberties of the very microbes colonising our frames before he's satisfied!" Megatron bawled in mirth. The door closed behind them and they each turned to face Bumblebee and Soundwave close by.

"Good to see you alright, Bee," Ravage acknowledged as he walked closer to them; "Hey, have you taken any looks at the Vehicons recently?"

"Not particularly," Bumblebee replied; "Is something happening with them?"

Ravage smiled. "A lot of them like you now; we noticed changes in their behaviour last cycle. Granted, their expressions are difficult to read without practice, but you should know that they've started to enjoy having you onboard."

It was a pleasant surprise for Bumblebee. He didn't think many of them would enjoy his presence, him being a former enemy after all, but Soundwave had hinted to him before that there was a peculiar aspect to the Vehicons distinguishing them from more typical infantry.

"Pets are better received than prisoners, it seems," Megatron commented, Bumblebee smiling bashfully at the thought; "Now then, I will be returning to the guest room in half a macron to begin the settlement. The proceedings will likely be less agitating for the Autobots if they have physical confirmation of your safety, hence why you are here with Soundwave. The four of you will be accompanying me there."

"When am I supposed to go in?" Bumblebee asked.

"You can enter during the discussions or after them, whatever you are most comfortable with," Soundwave elaborated in his own voice, which he seemed to be more comfortable using when enough familiar people were around; "The same courtesy is extended to Laserbeak and Ravage."

The three addressed mechs nodded. "We'll go with whatever you choose." Laserbeak told Bumblebee.

Bumblebee smiled. "Thanks. I appreciate the company."

Soundwave took a thoughtful stance. "That reminds me, we need to contact Shockwave as well. Bumblebee has given his approval to meet him."

"Then why not now?" Megatron offered; "We still have twenty five microns left."

"Now? Um, okay..." He wouldn't mind meeting Shockwave here, but it felt a little sudden to Bumblebee.

"Are you certain?" Soundwave asked, noticing his unease.

"Yes...Yes. I want to meet him now." he consented more firmly. It seemed as good a time as any.

Moving back to the workstation, Soundwave traced Shockwave's comms signal and contacted him. It could sometimes take a while due to how far Cybertron was, but no difficulties were encountered this time. A beeping noise indicated his call had been received, so he stepped away to allow Megatron to speak.

"Shockwave," he addressed; "Can you hear me?"

"Yes," a voice played through the audio system. It was deep, but subdued and calm. "I am still awaiting to be assigned elsewhere. If there is nothing that needs my attention I will begin a new project here."

"I have something for you," Megatron informed him; "We have a mech onboard the Nemesis whose mental condition is unstable. He once made a suicide attempt, but was stopped by Soundwave, who has been caring for him ever since. Gradually he is recovering, but relapses are likely without proper psychiatric attention. He has experienced one already."

A brief pause met Megatron before he was given a response. "You wish me to conduct psychiatry work with this mech then?"

"Yes. He has already consented to meeting you."

"May I learn the prospective patient's name?" Shockwave asked.

"Bumblebee," Another pause occurred, this time longer and creating an unnerving atmosphere. "Er, I am trying to make peace with the Autobots at present." he added to make sense of the situation.

"Very well," Shockwave agreed after a moment; "There are adequate resources for the task in my laboratory. I can bring some now if the therapy is to begin immediately."

"Not yet," Megatron told him; "For now it's best that you simply get acquainted. A settlement is occurring, so there won't be a chance for therapy yet. We would appreciate you coming to meet him now; we have some time before we leave."

Shockwave did not answer verbally, but the call stopped and a space bridge portal suddenly appeared near them in the room. A large frame plodded out of it, darkly shaded like Soundwave's and of similar size, though purple instead of blue and with wider armour skin. What stood out though was the single, large ruby optic in place of a face. For a few nanokliks Bumblebee was entranced.

"Please be more conscious of how you give information," Shockwave admonished Megatron as the portal closed; "For a moment I doubted your logic." He swiftly turned his attention to Bumblebee, striding towards him and Soundwave before Megatron could respond.

Ravage sprung towards Shockwave suddenly as he walked, climbing up his pede to his neck and curling around there. "I missed you, Shocky," he murmured, though as usual the scientist paid no heed and kept focus on his objective.

Shockwave could notice Bumblebee acting nervous as he approached, staying close to Soundwave for protection. Hypothesising that his electromagnetic cannon was causing some of the worry, he transformed it into a second servo for better appeal. He stopped opposite the patient and his caretaker, gazing down at the small frame and beginning analysis. "Shivering detected throughout frame; a large and abnormal amount, accompanied by twitches in the faceplate. Excessive reaction; indicative of high anxiety and lack of emotional stability," His optic emitted a more intense red light for a moment, illuminating Bumblebee's frame. "Nervous system scan indicates irregular spiking of emotional processing centres, a possible contribution to the acute somatosensory system. Structural damage detected in the same areas from gross electrochemical buildup, likely attributable to frequent past trauma. Conclusion: high probability of severe anxiety disorder or a similar condition."

'He can tell all that just from looking at me?' Bumblebee was awed by the display; they hadn't even spoke yet and Shockwave had already given his verdict. He was still somewhat unsure, but a gentle squeeze on his shoulder from Soundwave steadied him. Remembering this was a close acquaintance of his, Bumblebee smiled up at him in gratitude and took a small step forward.

"Greetings," the violet mech spoke, his calm tone inviting; "I am Shockwave." Ravage leapt off him to stand near Laserbeak and observe.

"Bumblebee..." he introduced himself shyly; "So, you're going to be my, um, psychiatrist?"

"Yes," came the simple reply. "I am informed you have already begun a recovery process with your assigned caretaker. Is this correct?" A nod was given in response. Shockwave sought confirmation, turning his head to face Soundwave who also nodded. "Then the additional input should be of aid as I administer your treatment. We will need to wait until next cycle to begin, as I understand you are involved in a settlement with your former faction."

So, Shockwave already noticed his lack of an insignia. Not surprising considering his analysis before. "What kind of treatment are you referring to?" Bumblebee asked.

"Psychological disorders are most well resolved through psychological methods. As such, your treatment will involve firstly gaining insight into the nature and causes of your condition, then addressing the outstanding issues until you have stabilised. This can be done using a cortical psychic patch alongside a suitable cognitive behavioural therapy. Are you satisfied with this?"

Bumblebee gave it some thought. He couldn't be sure what would happen if he let another person access his mind, but he trusted Shockwave would know what he was doing with the patch. He did create it after all. "Okay, I accept." he agreed, facing up at him.

"Your consent is appreciated," Shockwave acknowledged; "Any further discussion of this should be done privately, lest others than ourselves become privy to sensitive information. I will notify you if I am available to speak with again this cycle."

"It may take one or more macrons for the settlement to conclude," Soundwave speculated; "I will send a message when it finishes. In the meantime you may wish to form a suitable schedule to manage your time here."

"A logical course of action," Shockwave concurred; "I shall remain on the bridge for now to file a report on my recent endeavours. The results of this settlement will likely impact on my length of stay here, so I will refrain from seeking accommodation until then."

Megatron checked the time on his chronometer. "We have only three microns until it starts," he informed the four mechs who were accompanying him; "Shockwave, I will brief you on recent events when we next speak."

"Acknowledged," he responded; "I will cross reference with Soundwave and the network later to ensure the accuracy of your statements." His words earned him a light chuckle from the silver mech. Shockwave turned around to access a terminal near Soundwave's workstation and make his report, exchanging glances with the spymaster and his charge. "Presumably the Autobots will wish to reunite with Bumblebee. Will the environment be safe for the patient?" he asked.

"So long as he is accompanied," Soundwave answered; "I will allow him out of the guest room if he becomes distressed during the talks, and he may also wait until the discussions have finished if he wishes."

"Suitable precautions. Then I shall keep you no longer, Soundwave. I await our next opportunity to converse." Shockwave ceased conversation, turning his attention to the terminal.

The lack of personal interaction between them struck Bumblebee as odd considering what he'd learned of their past. For mechs who once behaved intimately with each other, Soundwave and Shockwave were acting very professionally. Then again, they both seemed to have a mature work ethic, so they likely prioritised their jobs in public. Before he could ponder further, he noticed Megatron walk towards the bridge doors with Soundwave and the minicons following. He quickly joined them, staying behind Soundwave with Laserbeak and Ravage as they all exited the bridge. Soon the main event of the current cycle was going to start; he could only hope his reunion with Optimus and the Autobots went well.

***

The wait felt longer than it was. Optimus had spent some time in idle chatter alongside the other Autobots, but he was now busy making use of the room's terminal in his restless state. He scoured through what he could of the ship's database, absorbing all relevant information that could be useful during the talk. It surprised him how seriously Megatron was taking their meeting, that he would allow his adversary some limited access to Decepticon Intel. The data he read through seemed to confirm Megatron's statement about extinction; there were damning statistical records showing major population declines over short periods since the war's beginning, on virtually all planets with a Cybertronian population. The vast majority of those worlds were now lifeless wastelands, mirroring the condition of Cybertron. He could only access authorised files of course, but the amount was large and unbiased, with detailed logs affirming that the collected information was accurate. The quality and meticulous care taken in making them could only result in the files being valid, he decided. Even now his archivist training had some relevance. "So much for the colonisation effort, then," he spoke out loud solemnly as he turned the terminal off; "The violence of our war has poisoned every place we settled. I had thought our species was less impulsive than this."

His words were heard by the other Team Prime members at the table, who turned the focus of their conversation to him. "Huh? Were you reading just now, Optimus?" Bulkhead asked.

"Yes. From the files I have studied, it appears that the Cybertronians here on Earth, Autobots and Decepticons together, are the only significant population left in the galaxy. On every other planet the migrants have self destructed from excessive warfare. We are all that remains." The expressions he received were a predictable mix of shock and sorrow.

"Frag." Bulkhead whispered, unable to find another mode of expression. He looked down at the floor and rubbed his head. Arcee clenched a servo, but relented from anything physical and started pacing around instead.

Ratchet was shaken too, though he masked it well, folding his arms and processing Optimus's words calmly. "You're certain this data is accurate?" he questioned just to be sure. There were many times he wished Optimus would be wrong about things, and this was one of them, but of course he nodded. He rarely erred when evaluating files.

Making a short sigh, Optimus strode over to the table and sat down, servos under mouth in a stance of reflection. "I wonder if there will be much discussion at all now. Megatron has not slandered or manipulated any part of this, and I have nothing to hold against him."

"Yes we do!" Arcee snapped, standing next to a wall and no longer capable of containing herself; "Our home world is still wrecked because of him! The cons still massacred us with their ambushes, their tox-en attacks and whatever else I wasn't there to see!" She turned round and punched the wall.

"I had my part in escalating the conflict Arcee, and I ordered similar atrocities against them at every step of this war. Do you not recall my command to use the experimental plasma Bombs on the Velocitron colonies?" His voice had a firmer and sharper edge than usual, a tone specially adapted to addressing outbursts like Arcee's.

"Worst. Order. Ever," Bulkhead reminisced with a shudder; "I'd never seen something so remorseless till then, and that's coming from a wrecker."

"Roughly a billion casualties, several civilians and even unfortunate Autobots," Ratchet elaborated, his memory of the event vivid; "The only time the Decepticons ever issued a surrender too. Ugh, to think before that I used to urge you to be tougher."

Arcee's expression went from angered to pained. "Okay, I get it! You were just as bad! But I still can't put it behind me. Our friends would still be alive if it wasn't for this war with the cons. If it never happened Cliffjumper would...Tailgate would..." She began despairing, drooping her head down and going silent.

Bulkhead brought a servo to his face. "Just had to remind me of Jackie, didn't you?" he grumbled bitterly. Ratchet meanwhile just groaned, running a system diagnostic to distract himself from the moment.

Optimus had a mental stumble for a moment, but eventually developed some advice. "Losing friends is among the most dreadful pains war can inflict; even now I still mourn the passing of Ultra Magnus. But I would disgrace his memory if I let the anguish from that consume me. To prevent further loss, further pain, is precisely why we are here for this settlement."

Arcee slowly raised her head again. "Guess I'm no better than her, in a way..." She sat back down next to Bulkhead, the two briefly touching servos and then calming down.

"Still got it, haven't you?" Ratchet huffed, noting how Optimus always found something appropriate to say; "So, when are we actually going to start? In a few more kliks I'll be getting cranky."

"They may have difficulties onboard. If so I could-" A noise from the other side of the door made everyone alert. "Ah, I hold my peace." Optimus concluded as the door opened.

*** ***

He felt more uneasy each moment, the anticipation making him jittery. The walk had been pleasant enough, but actually standing outside the room threw Bumblebee off balance. How were they going to react when he entered? Would they be angry? Sad? As per his habits he shook his head quickly, though of course it didn't stop his mind overthinking.

A stroke to his head rekindled his awareness. Bumblebee looked up to find that it came from Megatron, oddly enough. "Now I'm hardly as perceptive as Soundwave, but that shaking makes your mental state obvious to anyone," he rumbled in an affectionate tone; "Some advice: overanalysing a situation usually throws it out of proportion. What you think and what actually happens are often very different. It's a lesson I should have learned a long time ago."

The words sounded a bit funny spoken with Megatron's growly voice, but that didn't stop Bumblebee appreciating them. "Thanks. You don't seem as bad as people say."

Megatron gave a small chuckle. "It is a fairly recent development, though apparently my behaviour was similar in the past before the war." He walked closer to the door, waiting there until everyone was ready to go in.

Soundwave and the minicons stood patiently by the wall, so Bumblebee stepped closer to join them. "You're definitely a good advisor," he praised; "I'd like to go in, but can I be the last please?" He didn't want to make the atmosphere highly emotional at the very start. The immediate nod was pleasant, so he guessed Soundwave shared in his caution.

"I'm sure it will be fine for you," Laserbeak trilled below them; "Seeing you is the first reason they came anyway; that alone should indicate that they care. Besides, the discussions will likely be more pleasant with your company." Bumblebee grinned appreciatively, not having thought of it in such a way.

"Watch out." Ravage said abruptly and playfully to him, aware of Soundwave having a change in demeanour. Before Bumblebee could enquire he was covered by long arms and pulled close. It was embarrassing since they were in public, but he nonetheless relaxed into the other's abdomen. It was quite effective at raising his mood before he entered.

Soundwave released him after ten nanons, walking to the door alongside Megatron. "Wait here until we call you." he instructed.

"Okay. Good luck." Bumblebee responded, standing at the wall next to the door. The minicons stayed outside with him.

"You too." Soundwave watched Megatron enter the access code, then entered the alongside him into the presence of the Autobots.

"Greetings once again, Megatron," Optimus acknowledged once he entered; "Is all prepared for our discussion now?"

"I see everyone's been getting comfortable," Megatron quipped, but quickly got to the point; "Yes, we are ready now. Soundwave will be providing input as well." The communications chief promptly walked in, pressing a switch underneath the table to release three retractable chairs from it.

"I didn't know it did that." Bulkhead muttered.

"Autobots: checked terminal?" Soundwave asked, glancing at the item in question.

"Yes," Optimus confirmed; "You have my gratitude. The information will be most useful. That aside, may I ask why you have pulled out three chairs instead of two?"

"Why, for a third participant of course!" Megatron answered; "Or spectator, depending on his wishes. I believe he is part of why you are here?" The knowing and astonished looks that followed were more satisfying than any verbal answer.

Soundwave walked to the doorway, gesturing for Bee to come in. He nodded, feeling nervous but entering regardless, while the minicons stood by with Soundwave to watch.

Wide optics and faces met him, though they looked happier than he had imagined. "Bumblebee!" cried Bulkhead, rushing out of his seat and capturing the startled mech in a bear hug.

"Um, B-Bulkhead, I..." He warbled and trailed off, too bewildered to form words.

"Y-you're here, you're alive. I-I thought you were gone," He was half babbling, shivering a bit and not relenting in his tight hold, though Bee didn't mind. "I'm sorry, kid. I'm sorry we didn't help like we should have. I wish I'd made more effort to talk or something...then maybe you wouldn't have..."

"It's...it's alright, Bulkhead," he consoled, steadying himself enough to speak; "I'm not angry with any of you." He wasn't certain what else to say, so he just relaxed for another moment until Bulkhead released him. He guessed the surprised faces being directed at him were because of his repaired voice.

Laserbeak watched from the door with interest. "Good call to have him wait before coming in." he commented to Soundwave and Ravage. Megatron meanwhile took a seat opposite Optimus, watching Bumblebee walk further in towards the remaining Autobots.

Arcee, Ratchet and Optimus stood, but remained stationary and let Bumblebee approach. He came to Arcee first, whose face was a mixture of sorrow and happiness. "Good to see you're still around. Had us all forlorn, you know," She placed a servo on his shoulder. "Looks like your voice is back, huh? Didn't think the cons would allow something like that."

Bumblebee became shaky trying to respond. "Arcee, I...I'm sorry. I should have thought of you all more before I did it. You had it hard as well." It was a pang of guilt that he kept feeling. Soundwave had told him it wasn't realistic or productive, but it was one of those thoughts that nagged him.

Contorting her face briefly, Arcee steadied herself and produced a smile, squeezing Bee's shoulder gently. "Bee, don't lay my grievances on yourself; I'll deal with those in my own time. You have enough trouble already. As bad at staying calm as I am, I want these talks to go well for your sake now I know you're okay."

"There is no excuse for it: we neglected you," said Optimus, stepping closer; "We could have done more, even if we were constantly on mission." 

Her servo lifting off him, Bumblebee stepped away from Arcee and over to Optimus. Unexpectedly, the Prime knelt down and cuddled him. "I thought, I thought I was becoming a burden to you all," he explained shakily, becoming emotional; "Every cycle I would just hold you back with my fears."

Optimus stroked his head. "I am sorry. I originally assigned you to my team because of your troubles, hoping I could assist you somehow. But with all the tasks that needed performing there was never the chance," He stilled briefly to look at Bumblebee's frame. "Your insignia is gone."

The former Autobot froze. "I, I..."

The Prime's grip tightened. "Shhh, I understand. I learned shortly after enlisting you that you were conscripted. There's nothing shameful about your decision, and we all support it. You should never have been dragged into this conflict."

"We didn't think it appropriate to comment on it when you entered," Ratchet contributed, coming closer; "We've all suffered one time too many by now. Your well being is more important to us than any affiliations."

"Thank you." Bumblebee responded. Optimus loosened his grip and stood up, allowing him to face Ratchet completely.

"Don't mention it. I'm getting too old to be barking much longer anyway, not that I take that advice most of the time." Bumblebee snorted slightly at the self aware statement.

Footsteps behind them caught their attention, the five turning to see Soundwave and his minicons opposite them. "Has this transpired better than you expected?" the spymaster asked Bumblebee in his own voice, shocking the Autobots. He acknowledged Bumblebee's nod, then faced Optimus.

"You are the person that contacted us?" Optimus could recognise the voice from the message. He had never heard Soundwave speak outside of monotone before.

"Yes. I happened upon Bumblebee during his suicide attempt and brought him here. He has been under my care ever since."

Bumblebee turned to face Optimus and elaborate. "I was scared at first, but he and his symbionts have kept me safe here. We've discussed my condition together and worked out some coping strategies. I'm also going to be getting therapy soon."

"All that in just a few cycles?" Optimus smiled at Soundwave. "I see. Then you have my sincerest gratitude for keeping Bumblebee away from harm." Ratchet and Arcee stared, perplexed.

Bulkhead walked up to Soundwave. "Um...thanks. For taking care of him." he managed after a moment of unease. Soundwave nodded and took his seat next to Megatron, the minicons resting on his legs. Bumblebee sat on the third chair beside him.

"Well, now that everyone's mood is lightened, what say we begin our discussions?" Megatron could hardly hide his satisfaction at how mellow Optimus looked.

"I would be happy to, but I don't think there is much to say," As he sat back down with the other Autobots, Optimus uploaded the data he collected from the terminal to the table's holo projector. "Having browsed the files on the network, I cannot be in doubt over your statement of our impending extinction."

"But we still-" Arcee stopped herself, noticing Bumblebee stare at her worried. "I'm sorry. Let's see this through." Ratchet placed an arm over her, helping her settle.

Ravage nudged Laserbeak in the moment of silence. "Isn't she the one who was partnered with that mech?" he whispered.

Laserbeak took a strained expression. "Yes, that's her." Naturally Soundwave noticed their demeanour and stroked them in understanding, the minicons relaxing again on his thighs.

Optimus sighed briefly. "All points considered, I have little option but to agree to make peace with you. It is pointless to carry our conflict further than this," The other Autobots remained silent, seemingly expecting the outcome. "However," he cautioned; "We will still need to find an appropriate method of implementing this alliance." He was now almost certain Megatron's wishes were sincere, but there was still the danger of a fallout over methodology if it wasn't discussed and planned first.

"Excellent, Orion!" Megatron praised. No reaction from the name this time, but he was too elated to care. "Then we should begin planning immediately. Knowing us we'll snap in the first few microns of the process otherwise." The former archivist gave a mildly amused grunt, straightening himself on the seat in preparation.

For his part, Bumblebee was ecstatic. Ravage noticed and leapt from Soundwave's lap to his, getting comfortable as the discussions began. The event lasted for just over a macron and covered several different topics. It became quite technical, and Bumblebee couldn't understand it all, but they were mainly talking about organising a state and restoration project on Cybertron. It involved a lot of resource planning, the main objectives being to revive the natural energon springs and resuscitate the ecosystem. While it was mainly a scientific task, a political structure was still necessary for the survivors. Optimus and Megatron would handle that area, recolonising a suitable area and forming a government, while people like Ratchet, Shockwave and Soundwave would spearhead the restoration. Bumblebee mostly just spectated, but it was an engaging talk and he couldn't help suggesting a few things. Soundwave in particular was lively, probably making up for lack of past intervention, which amused everyone since he wasn't known to talk so much. They ended by drafting a charter for the new state: it declared an official end to the war, unifying the remaining Autobots and Decepticons under an alliance with common liberties and a reprieve for all war crimes against one another. It would need to be reviewed with the other officers' input before it could be fully implemented, but for now everyone seemed satisfied. All arrangements made, each person in the room stood up and prepared to leave.

"Well, I should think that this will suffice as a preliminary," spoke Megatron in a placated tone; "We will likely need an Earth week to prepare for departure. What are your plans in the meantime?"

"We will return to our base and gather the resources we have," Optimus replied; "Then we will bid farewell to our human company and return here for the journey."

"Very well. I will relay the results of this settlement to the crew and have you enlisted as honorary members. You may remove those arm bands now." The Autobots promptly did so and gave them back to him, Megatron placing them in his subspace for later.

Optimus exchanged farewell gestures with Megatron, walking towards the door but stopping briefly next to Bumblebee and Soundwave. "Will you be staying here?" he asked his former scout.

"Yes," Bumblebee affirmed quickly; "We'll be discussing my recovery more up here, so it would just disrupt things if I return with you."

"If that is your wish. Then we will check on you again in a week's time," He shot a quick glance at  
Soundwave. "Continue keeping him safe." he urged, receiving a firm nod from the dark mech.

Most of the Autobots then exited the room with Megatron, exchanging waves as they left, but Ratchet stopped briefly as well to get something off his mind. "You mentioned therapy," he recalled from earlier; "May I know from whom?"

"Shockwave," Soundwave answered bluntly for Bumblebee.

"Is...Is that truly wise?" Ratchet cautioned.

"I've already met him and consented," Bumblebee explained; "Soundwave has a history with him, so I should learn how to interact with him easily enough. He hasn't shown any reservations either."

"Alright," the medic accepted hesitantly; "I'll still want to be kept informed about your time with him, though. Goodbye for now." He left abruptly upon finishing, expecting Arcee would yell at him if he didn't hurry.

With everyone gone and the door closed, Soundwave retracted his visor and offered Bumblebee a cuddle in their privacy. He was met with eager acceptance and knelt down so their faces were more level, the two mechs wrapping arms around each other while Laserbeak smothered Ravage on the table. "You seem much happier now." he observed in delight.

"Yeah," he agreed; "I didn't think it would go so well. Just the pleasant reunion would have been fine, but with a successful settlement on top of that I feel like I'm overflowing." Soundwave huffed affectionately at his statement. His head was stroked by thin fingers, Bumblebee purring happily into the larger mech's shoulder. "What do you think of my chances with Shockwave?" he wondered after a moment.

"He can be challenging to comprehend for most, but rest assured that he will remain dedicated to your therapy throughout. He values his work more than other matters, so the ending of the war will likely be satisfying for him. With my presence he will have further impetus to help you as well."

"I guess he'd be happy to assist someone his old partner takes a liking to," A bashful expression suddenly overtook Bumblebee. "That reminds me, there's something I...well, I've been wanting to say something to you since last night, but I'm a bit scared to."

"Ooh, is this a confession?" Ravage speculated excitedly, causing the yellow mech to blush and earning a disciplining squeeze from Laserbeak. He was kept trapped in his older counterpart's wings, but allowed to look ahead and observe.

Soundwave chuckled deeply, tightening his hold on his smaller partner. "I think I understand your intentions, little Bee," he murmured playfully into his audials, producing a shiver; "Similar thoughts have passed my mind as well in your presence. Don't worry if you can't find the words; it isn't something that needs to be said, only felt."

"Thanks. It's just that whenever I'm with you I keep wanting to get closer, and not just like this. It's like I want to become part of you or something," He shivered again in the cosy warmth enveloping his frame, locking optics with Soundwave and reducing his voice to a near whisper. "Would you, um, would be willing to, to be intimate with me?"

Soundwave suddenly stood up while holding Bee, sitting on the edge of the table and straddling his small legs around his waist. "I very much would," he murmured; "But if you wish to deepen our relationship, we need to discuss limits first."

"What sort of limits?"

"Only one for now: don't become attached. If you start feeling as if you can't live without me, we need to stop. It would defeat the purpose of your recovery if you began feeling as if you needed me, or that you couldn't act independently."

"Okay," Bumblebee accepted. He wasn't sure how he could manage that in his condition, but the therapy and Soundwave's mindfulness teachings would hopefully strengthen him enough for it. "Could we stop and then restart later if I'm more stable?"

"Perhaps. I would need to determine how stable you were before we reapplied ourselves, however. If it raises your confidence to know, I wouldn't have accepted your offer yet if I didn't think you were stable enough already." Bumblebee beamed at his statement and cuddled more closely.

Laserbeak chirped to draw Bee's attention. " To put it simply, it's damaging to 'need' your partner. But that doesn't mean you can't still 'want' them. Ravage and I can teach you from experience." Bumblebee nodded in comprehension, Laserbeak releasing Ravage and sitting close by with him.

"Other limits will depend on our preferences as the relationship develops," Soundwave expounded; "So, do you accept under these terms?"

"Yes," Bumblebee consented. The sudden kiss Soundwave gave him to seal their decision was unexpected, but he relaxed into it nonetheless, enjoying the feeling of being wrapped around the bigger chassis. They separated after a micron, a small point of worry crossing Bee's mind. "Will Shockwave disapprove of this?"

"Doubtful," Soundwave reassured confidently; "In fact, he'll probably consider it a great aid to your recovery provided we manage it well. For scientific reasons, he often compels people to release tension whenever it arises."

"So, it wouldn't affect your relationship with each other?"

"We have little time for such things now, with all the work Shockwave does. He advocates polyamory besides, so there shouldn't be any issue." He took Bumblebee off his waist upon seeing his smile, the smaller mech sitting beside him.

"Well, guess you're part of the family now," Ravage said happily; "Hey, Soundwave, do you think it's worth giving him our link program?"

"Yet another thing Shockwave would urge me to do," he chortled mildly; "Well, Bumblebee, would you be interested?"

"Um, Yes. Yes, that would be nice," he accepted. Laserbeak and Ravage came towards him and cuddled briefly, eliciting a laugh from him. They each stood up from the table and headed to the door, preparing to leave for their quarters. "Thank you, Soundwave. I wasn't sure you'd be interested."

"I wished for you to bring up the topic first, that way I could better ascertain your readiness." He reactivated his visor, opening the door to the scarcely populated corridor.

A point of interest crossed Bumblebee's mind. "Hey, you and Shockwave acted very professionally on the bridge. I was wondering if you act any different in private."

Soundwave allowed himself a brief snicker. "If we see each other again in a less public environment, he'll likely pin me to the wall for a few microns." Bumblebee gave his own snicker at the mental image, the four mechs beginning their walk to their quarters.

"You know," Bumblebee stated as they walked; "I really enjoy being your 'pet'."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And with that, part 1 of this story is complete! I'll be working on some offshot stories to this before starting on part 2, so this won't be updated until those are posted. They'll be set between parts 1 and 2, during the time between this chapter's end and the departure to Cybertron. Just to warn, they'll likely take a more erotic angle than the main story, exploring the character relationships more personally and intimately. Expect some Explicit ratings.
> 
> As for part 2 itself, it will likely get quite scientific. It's main content will include Bumblebee's therapy with Shockwave and the Cybertron restoration project, so the language may become more technical than part 1 in some places. New characters will be introduced as well.
> 
> I'd like to take this moment to thank everyone who's graced this story with their time. For a long while I wasn't sure I could make this work, but the responses to it have been more positive than I imagined. I should be going into the offshots and part 2 with better confidence now. Thank you once again, I cannot state enough how much I appreciate this story being read.


End file.
